Everything But Mine
by Death Can't Be Trusted
Summary: The screams,scent of blood will always haunt him. Even as Light moves on and makes a name for himself at Whammy's,he still feels lost. L has an attraction to him,but Light is too heavily guarded. Will friendship prevail,and love sprout and survive?
1. The Butler Man

Death: I really didn't want to do this. I already have enough stories that are unfinished, and I really want to get back to work on them. But this idea couldn't leave me alone, and so I wrote it out. This is strange for me, the first chapters are usually short. Yet for some reason I couldn't stop writing it out until I knew it was right to end it at where it is now. Anyway, I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

**Chapter 1** The Butler Man

=3=

Screams echoed in his head, never giving him a moment of peace. He'd never be able to forget the screams. The thick scent of blood from those screams would always stick to his body no matter how many times he washed. The last words his father had spoken to him were to take his sister and hide. The guilt of doing what he was told while their parents were slain would forever come back and haunt him, robbing him of what little sleep his body managed.

And yet somehow, through all of this, they were going to make him take a test from some old man with the simple appearance of a butler. The boy sat in the given chair with distant eyes.

"Excuse me, Light-kun, you understand English don't you?" The butler man sat opposite of him.

The boy simply shrugged.

"You can understand me, right?" Butler Man pressed again.

He hesitated for a moment, but nodded.

"Good. I'm going to hand you a series of tests of different subjects. A lot of the questions are more advanced for an eight year old, but I want you to answer as many as you can. The first test I'll be giving is math." Butler Man handed over the test packet.

"Here is your scratch paper and pencil. If you want another piece of scratch paper then raise your hand. You can circle your answers in the test booklet but you can't show your work on the test. Obviously there are no calculators allowed. You have two hours to complete the test." The old man instructed.

Light took hold of the pencil and opened the test to the first page. First look at the first few questions almost made him snort. But he restrained not because he wanted to, it was natural for Light to be polite until he was given a reason not to. Not to mention Butler Man was several years older, so he didn't have a choice in the matter.

'_Always respect your elders.'_ His mother always reminded him.

Eyes narrowed at the thought. His mother wasn't here anymore. Light quickly shoved the thought and emotions aside. He was supposed to be taking a test. And so the boy began to circle the answers, quickly moving through the first grader questions.

As he progressed, not once did Light reach for the scratch paper. He circled his answers with quick precision. A few times the boy paused to think over the answers. But overall Light didn't doubt himself. And he still didn't reach for the scratch paper.

Unbeknownst to the old man, Light had gone to the library in his community whenever he could and checked out advanced school subjects. The boy had grown tired of the boring subjects at school, and secretly advanced himself through self learning to cure his boredom. His parents never knew for Light kept the books hidden and never turned them in late so that a notice wouldn't come into their mail.

Before either of them knew it, Light was done. The boy quietly set the pencil down neatly and closed the test booklet and politely handed it back. Butler Man took it, glancing at an expensive watch on his wrist.

'_Amazing…he finished the test within an hour and ten minutes. That's fairly close to _his_ time, an hour and eight minutes.'_ But the elder man still had some doubts. This boy could still be guessing the answers out of pride. After all some of the math questions went as far as trigonometry.

"Good work, son. The next test is science. Would you like to take a break before continuing?" Butler Man gathered the next test booklet and a new pencil.

Light shook his head.

"All right, you have the same amount of time. Two hours." The elder handed the test booklet and pencil over.

Light picked up the pencil and opened the booklet. To his surprise, the first page was in the subject of biology. The boy looked up at the man he dubbed Butler Man in surprise. It was the first emotion that had slipped through. Even then the shock of given a test better suited for him was shown only for a few moments. The moment the surprise had shown itself, it was gone.

The distant look appeared once more. Light glanced back down at the test. With more determination the boy breezed through the questions. He didn't know what these tests were for, however Butler Man wanted something. It probably would have been best if Light listened to him at the beginning.

It was too late for questions now. He was in the middle of taking a science test. And once again Light never reached for the scratch paper just a few inches away. Once again there were a few times he paused to think over the answers. The highest Light managed to reach in the science department was chemistry. At one point he looked up some terms of physics, just enough for a basic understanding.

However even with this kind of information stored in Light's head, it didn't do much help as the questions advanced further and further into physics. Light had struggled a bit through the chemistry section, but he was able to pull through. But physics was a whole new different level.

So from there Light did what he could with his deduction abilities from what little understanding he had of physics. He thought he was doing fine, if not a little slower than usual. Then he came to a question that he did not know the answer to.

No matter how many times he read the question or the answers, Light had absolutely no idea how to answer it. To mock him further it so happened to be the very last question in the booklet. Light wanted to scream in frustration. His hand began to shake as he did his best to control himself.

Then the screams and smell of blood invaded his senses. In a panic Light flipped the test closed and shoved it away. Butler Man did tell him to answer as many as he could. It hurt him not being able to answer the _last_ question, but since it was only one question maybe he could let this one go.

Butler Man, who was almost done going over the math test, stared at him with surprise. For whatever reason the boy had a bad reaction to not figuring out the answer to the last question, and it surprised him that the boy let out a strangled whimper as he shoved the test away.

'_If he's this upset over the science test, I'd hate to see his reaction to the English test… However his time was still almost matching _his_.'_ And so to allow the boy to calm down he decided to choose a different test next.

"Good work, Light-kun. The next test is history. Do you want to take a break or shall we continue?"

The boy hesitated. Then he extended a hand towards Butler Man.

The old man understood that the boy wished to continue on to the next test and handed it over with a new pencil.

"Once again you have two hours." Butler Man told the boy.

The boy silently took hold of the new pencil and opened the new test booklet.

=3=

Watari observed the boy with new found interest. From the beginning Light was distant and remained quiet, never responding. He had been worried that the boy was still in shock. In a way Light still was, but Watari concluded that the moment the boy set eyes on the questions a small part of his normal self returned.

What really caught Watari's attention was the boy's ability to finish the tests in a pace that rivaled L's. Thus far Watari had only see one other person who could come close to L's timing, but Light's time had only been a minute or two off while the other was merely five to seven minutes off of L's record.

The difference from five to seven to a minute or two was staggering. And Light had trouble with a few questions, Watari knew. Light was still a young boy, not even ten years old, so it came to no surprise that the boy would pause and think over his answers.

If Light were to have no difficulties, then surely his timing would either match or beat L's. There was no doubt in Watari's mind that this boy would have a bright future in Whammy's House. However, there were a few setbacks.

One, Light has been closing himself from the rest of the world. It was evident from his behavior that the murder of his parents left a horrible emotional scar. Watari knew the reason why, he had read the file before he entered the police station where the boy's father once worked.

Two, Watari feared what would happen if he took Light to Whammy's. The boy would either come out of his shell, or clam himself up even more.

According to Matsuda, who had worked with Light's and Sayu's father, Light had been a bright child. He had no trouble getting along with others. He got good grades and always looked out for his little sister.

However, there were a few exceptions to Light's politeness to strangers. It was Aizawa, another detective who worked with Chief Yagami who gave Watari the warning.

Aizawa was also a father, so he noticed things that the others who worked with the chief didn't. The few times that the children needed a ride home Aizawa was always the one who volunteered, his daughter was around Sayu's age so he wasn't bothered by the fact he could pick both of the chief's kids and his daughter. It helped that his daughter and Sayu went to the same preschool.

So he developed a routine. Pick up Light from his school first, and then pick up the girls. But on one peculiar occasion Aizawa had to wait. Raito would usually stand at the front of the school waiting for his ride. However on that day, he wasn't there. So, Aizawa figured Light was running a little late.

Ten minutes later, Aizawa grew frustrated. He flicked the keys and killed the engine and got out. Aizawa began wandering around the school calling out for Light. In the middle of it he heard shouting, and what sounded like a fight.

Aizawa ran towards the shouts and came upon a crowd of boys surrounding the two who were fighting. One of the boys was Light who leapt at his opponent with a yell. Aizawa gathered his wits and pulled the boys apart and brought both of them to the nurse's office.

Later it was learned that the boy Light had fought with made an attempt to bully him that day. Light took it the wrong way and instead of telling a teacher he decided to handle the bully himself. In the end the boy had a broken nose, a black eye and a limp while Light walked away with nothing but scratches and a couple of bruises.

From that day onward the boy who had fallen victim to Light's attack always had a limp as he walked. And the boy will probably have a limp for the rest of his life. The boy had been showing promise to become an athlete in soccer; it had been that boy's dream. But now he may never get that chance because of his own choice to try and bully the 'smart boy'.

Yet Light didn't apologize, and never did.

Now that the boy was clamming up, Watari had a few good ideas who would be possible roommates with Light that will ease him out of his shell, but to the rest of the orphanage Light might have a bad reaction. It wasn't like Watari couldn't trust Light, but for the fact he couldn't trust some of the other children at Whammy's.

Children are children, always making jokes of others. But Light certainly didn't think himself as one, and it didn't help that he always took everything too seriously. If anyone rubbed him the wrong way the boy will see that person as an enemy. That is something that will have to be taken care of.

How to take care of Light's behavior would be a problem. The boy is too smart for his own good, so setting up this boy's behavioral problems and fixing them will be tricky. Oh well, some other day Watari will have to figure it out.

They were almost done with the testing. Light had passed the math and history tests with flying colors. The grade on the science test had been a little off, but still high up there. However, on the English test Light was slipping.

About halfway through the boy threw it to the floor.

Watari had silently collected it and returned to his seat. Boys will be boys, the elder reminded himself as he restrained a chuckle from making itself known.

'_We'll have to squeeze in some anger management classes in his schedule.'_ Watari concluded.

=3=

"It's decided. This boy will come with me to my orphanage. We will be leaving tomorrow." Watari announced a few hours later.

"But…Light-kun should stay here! I know this was a favor for the chief, but to move now is too soon for the boy!" Matsuda objected.

"I am sorry, but he has to come with me. For several reasons I cannot tell you where we'll be going. And I have more grave news. Sayu-chan will have to stay here. I do not see potential in her as I do with Light-kun." Watari glanced briefly at the siblings.

Sayu was sleeping on her brother's shoulder while Light stared at him blankly. For a brief moment there was a hint of anger in those eyes.

"What? You're separating them? Sayu needs her brother!" Aizawa argued.

"Light will be in good hands. From what I can see Sayu-chan is too young to realize what had happened. She will be better off here than with us. However, Light-kun has a very advanced mind and he knows every detail in the murder of his parents. I can assure you, our orphanage can offer everything he will need to recover. He barely shows any signs of trauma, and that is what disturbs me. So if you will please, allow him to come with me, for his own sake." Watari pleaded with sincere worry.

At the mention of every detail, the others tensed. They had no idea that Light knew what had happened. The boy never said a word when they found him in the closet holding his dear little sister. A few of the men glanced at Light.

Out of curiosity Watari followed their gazes. And for the third time this day, the old man was shocked.

In Light's eyes was a deep heated hatred. The warm honey color had darkened to an almost red, nearly giving Light the appearance of a cursed doll with his pale skin and soft hair.

'_This boy will be trouble.'_ Watari thought. _'However, if we do this correctly, then we can turn this boy around. He has incredible potential.'_

When the detectives looked away from the boy, his eyes dulled into the distant mask he wore since the day his world was turned upside down.

=3=

The next morning Watari was helping the boy pack. The children had been staying with Aizawa as a temporary foster home. The fate of Sayu was still going to be decided, but for now she will remain within Aizawa's house. It will probably be for the best for the next few months.

Sayu knew Aizawa and his daughter. Although she couldn't say their names right she recognized them through the times Aizawa picked them up from preschool. A sudden change in a young girl's life such as the death of her parents, and now being separate from her brother, Sayu will need the comfort from people she knew.

Light, however, will have to learn how to open up once he arrives at Whammy's. Watari knew it will be difficult, but nothing is ever impossible.

"You can bring a few of your clothes. But you can't bring any pictures or anything that will trace you to Japan. I will allow you to bring one personal item, but I will have to approve it first." Watari told the boy.

Light was neat as he folded his chosen clothes. He was careful to put them into the suitcase, making sure they wouldn't be wrinkled. When the boy was done Light sat on the bed as he held a framed photograph.

Watari knew what the photograph was. It was a photograph of the Yagami family. The time frame was fairly recent, perhaps a few months before everything changed. The elder man showed some sympathy.

"It will take some time, but you will get used to Whammy's House. For safety purposes you cannot bring that picture with you. However it would be for the best to leave it with Sayu-chan, don't you think?" Watari tilted his head.

As usual Light remained silent. For a few moments they remained still. With no more hesitation the boy nodded. Watari smiled kindly.

"Is there anything personal you would like to take with you? A stuffed animal or a book, as long as it's in English, perhaps?"

For another moment Light stared at the photograph. Then gently the boy set the frame beside him on the bed and stood up. Light glanced around the guest room, which had most of the stuffed toys and books he had brought with him.

Watari observed the boy with slight curiosity. There were cute stuffed plushies around the room. It wouldn't surprise the elder man that some of them were Sayu's.

Light reached for a small plushie of a panda. Around its neck was a red scarf, and a cute pink tongue was sticking out of its mouth. Light came back to the bed with the panda on his lap, and the photograph in hand.

"Well, let's go. I believe it's about time we leave." Watari announced.

=3=

They had finished a silent good bye breakfast. It would be the last meal Light will have in his home country for a long time. And, it will probably be the very last meal he'll ever have with his little sister, the last remaining family he had.

Through the meal, Sayu was happy. And because of her care free nature, Light too cracked a smile now and then. But they all knew that the smiles were forced. It was the boy's way of showing his little sister a memory that she should cherish. The final moments with her brother.

Once they were done, Watari carried Light's suitcase into the trunk of the rented car. As he closed the trunk, Light stood by the passenger doors, holding the panda and the photograph.

"Nii-san, where you going?" Sayu asked, sensing something was wrong.

Light stared at his sister. And for the first time warmth of a normal boy seeped through his honey colored eyes. This was his goodbye.

"Sayu." Light whispered.

Watari, Aizawa and his wife stared at the boy with wide eyes. It was the first time Light had spoken in a week, since that fateful day.

The girl tilted her head and blinked.

"Here..." The boy handed her the photograph.

Sayu took it, staring at the figures in the photograph.

"Mama…Papa…" Sayu whimpered, tears forming on the corner of her eyes. "Where's Mama and Papa?"

"They won't come back." Light answered.

"Then…Nii-san will stay, right?" Tears were falling now. Sayu then tried to reach out to the panda, but her brother stepped away.

"Nii-san! That's Sayu's panda! Nii-san will stay with Sayu! And Sayu wants panda!"

Light shook his head. He was now holding the panda close to his chest, as if it was the most precious thing he had. Watari came closer and put his hand on Sayu's tiny shoulder.

"Sayu-chan. Your brother has no choice but to leave. His last wish is a trade. He wants you to have this photograph, to remember him and your parents by. In return, he wishes to keep something that will remind him of you. So that when he feels lonely, he'll have something that once belonged to someone from his family. Please, allow him to keep the panda." Watari said in a gentle voice.

Sayu stared at Butler Man with wide eyes. She wiped away her tears and lowered her gaze to her older brother, who still clutching and squeezing the panda into his chest as if his life depended on it. Sayu sniffed, and reached forward. Light closed his eyes as the screams and smell of blood haunted him once more.

Then just as it came, the screams and scent of blood vanished. Light warily opened his eyes to the sight of Sayu's bright smile and her small hand on top of his head. She was petting his hair, just like their father used to do.

And for the first time since that day their parents died, Light cried.

=3=

Light woke up to Watari gently shaking his shoulder. They had to travel in multiple of planes to reach London. Through most of it Light either slept or remained awake during the whole flight. Because of the difference in time zones his body had yet to adjust, therefore he fell asleep the moment he sat in the car.

Holding the panda bear close, Light stepped out of the strange vehicle. He stared up at the eerie black gates and the large estate that will be his home for the next ten years. Light understood that he was put into this orphanage because of his high intellect, and his ability to absorb information and store it into his head like a filing cabinet. He was to become a member of Whammy's House, and if possible become a letter.

To graduate as a letter, meant that Light will be free. And he will be granted the opportunity to fight crime, and to use his intellect to help the mastermind, the greatest among them.

L.

Light had no idea what to think of that person. He'd never met L, after all he'd just arrived at Whammy's. However, Light wasn't so sure if he could ever work in groups. The boy had learned early on in school that he did best working alone. And thus Light never made any friends. He saw no reason to, but according to Butler Man he'd have to make at least one friend at the orphanage if he didn't want to be picked on.

'_Let's see them try.'_ Light narrowed his eyes.

"From now on, you have to abandon the name your parents have given you. I know this will be hard. But your identity has to be kept a secret in this place. Do not worry, I won't tell a soul of your true name. And in return of abandoning your name, I will give you a new one. A name that you will call yourself in Whammy's and it will be a name that shields your true name from the rest of the world." Watari told the boy.

"What's my name now, Butler Man?" Light snorted after a moment of silence.

Startled, Watari gaped at the boy. After a moment the elder smiled, letting out a soft chuckle. He had to say, this boy was very bold. It could have been because of the effects of little sleep that Light wasn't so afraid to let his guard down. He was too tired to hold up the mask. And for just a little while he wasn't afraid to show his true self. A normal eight year old boy, meeting the world head on as if it was another test he had to complete. This was an interesting boy indeed. Watari smiled.

"Your new name shall be Kinship."

=3=

Death: I know, not a great title. After all, the title of this story is named after a song by Backstreet Boys. But it was all that I could think of that will fit this story's plotline the best. And I couldn't help but nickname Watari "Butler Man", Watson was already taken.

1) In this story's timeline, Light was born in the year 2000. Therefore he's growing up with a very modern era in a very early age compared to the storyline in Death Note. With this in mind, I think that Light would be able to read and understand advanced subjects even at the age of eight. He is a prodigy after all, and developed a good sense of the world around him.

2) For a long while, because of the trauma of the murder of his parents, Light will be out of character compared to what he is in Death Note. How effected his behavior and mind will be, is going to be shown in each chapter and how he progresses. This is only the start of everything, but later on he'll be older. The next chapter will be more about Light's experience in Whammy's House, and who his roommate will be. I'm sorry to say this, but L won't make an appearance til probably chapter 3 or 4.

3) Why was Light renamed Kinship? It's because of the panda bear that he exchanged for the Yagami family picture. Watari thought that he should honor Light's strong love for his little sister, and to his parents even though they're dead, therefore naming him Kinship.

Anyway, I'm done explaining things. Please click the review button below!


	2. A Name Is Who You Are

Death: I think this story is coming along nicely. I mean plot wise, so hopefully I can finish this story before the summer ends. I already have major plans in the next few chapters xD

Disclaimer: I will never disgrace Tsugumi Ohba-sama and Takeshi Obata-sama, the real creators of Death Note. So, therefore, I own nothing. Though I wish I had Light's panda that he's attached to. But I do have a White Mokona! xD

**Chapter 2** A Name Is Who You Are

=3=

Names are what a new born baby is given by their parents. They are what set one person from another, the very definition of that person. Therefore, every name has a meaning of some sort, whether it is something simple or complex, it was chosen by the parents for a reason.

Light often wondered why he was named 'Light'. Why would his mother, a Japanese woman who grew up in Japan, give him an English name? No, it wasn't a name. It was actually a nametag of something.

So, why would his mother name him after an inanimate object?

Actually, light isn't an object, but something that gives people hope. Each day that the sun shines, humans take advantage of the light that helped them survive. In the very beginning of civilization, humans realized that the sun was the seed that helped them live. It was the sunlight that fed their crops, and through their crops the humans advanced, and began to learn how to survive on their own.

And, gradually, over a long period of time, the humans didn't seem to appreciate the sun. Over the thousands of years humans became too comfortable with the dangerous planet that was their mother. With technology advancing, and light bulbs lighting up the starry skies, humans had forgotten that the light was their sole reason for living. It was the beginning, the light.

Sachiko Yagami always had a dream, a dream that stayed with her since she was a young girl. She had a dream, that someday she will grow her own garden. She was one of the few that woke up in the morning with a smile, because the sun gave her hope. Hope that she will live this day. She never took advantage of the sun and its powerful light.

When she gave birth to her first child, she and her husband, Soichiro Yagami, they smiled at their little boy. Although Sachiko wished for a little girl, she was still happy with the boy. When she first discovered that she was pregnant, she instantly fell in love with the child. And so she wanted to keep the gender of her first child a secret until they were born.

She wanted to name the child Hope.

However, as soon as she held the little boy in her arms for the first time, she knew that the name didn't suit him. Sachiko could tell, just from the first few seconds of knowing her son, that the boy was too stubborn. A few hours later she had evidence to back up her theory, for the boy didn't want to take a nap, even though he was only four hours old.

Sachiko smiled at her husband lovingly.

Why don't we name him something special? Those were her words, and her husband nodded. Soichiro could see that his boy was special too, and he would agree with anything that his wife wanted to name him.

And so, Sachiko named her little boy Light.

It's not like he hated his name, no not at all. But the first day he went to school with high hopes, some of the other kids didn't understand his name. And so, Light was immediately the outcast. The lone wolf, the weird one, the quiet one, the one who always knew what the answer was, and later he would be known as the smart kid.

It was because they casted him aside without even knowing him, that Light began to learn how to fend by himself. He learned to leave the greedy kids who wanted all of the toys, and to ignore the bratty kids who did nothing but gossip. Through the first year of his life, Light was bored.

But, that all changed when the teacher began to teach the class how to read and write. Suddenly, Light wasn't so bored anymore. He caught on how to read and write faster than the others, and so he started visiting the school library to expand his mind. Through the library, Light visited places that he'd never seen or heard of.

And because of this, Light started to advance in school subjects just out of plain curiosity and boredom. Since then, the boy began to appreciate the name his mother had given him. And the more he appreciated his name he gained enough confidence to accept himself the way he was.

Now, however, Light was being forced to give up his name. The name that his mother had given him, a name that made him to what he was today.

To throw away his name, Light Yagami, did not suite him. The boy hated doing this, but he had no choice in the matter. He had no home, no family, and no country. To rebel would not only be rude, but it would accomplish nothing but failure.

So in time, the boy will learn to accept this new name, Kinship. However that doesn't mean he won't cast away the name his parents gave him. No, Light will not do it. He figured that it was enough for him to keep his family close in mind, to always remember those days that were filled with warmth.

Instead, the boy was going to lock away his name. Lock it away in a safe, and never open it. Light Yagami is a name which will never be forgotten by him. But it will never be whispered, or said in a loving way. That was what hurt the boy the most.

=3=

The boy wasn't sure what to think of his new name. He understood the meaning of his new name, but he wasn't entirely sure if the name suited him. But still, Light kept hold of the name as if it was an extension of him. To the boy, Kinship was nothing but a new piece of clothing.

As he followed Butler Man into the grounds of the orphanage estate, he could feel the stares of the other children that were playing outside. Light didn't like to be stared at, and picked up the pace to be as close as Watari as possible.

Although he wished not to show any weakness, he was alone. The only person Light could trust at this moment was Watari. And he knew that Butler Man had enough influence to decide whether a child would be brought into Whammy's or not, so no one would dare make a move towards the old man.

A low chuckle sounded from Watari. Light frowned, but didn't complain.

"It's all right, they know better than to come onto a newcomer. They're merely curious about you. We only receive about five newcomers every three years or so as the oldest children move out and live on their own. You're the first newcomer in about four years, so they're eager for a new face." Watari smiled thoughtfully.

Light didn't respond, but he still soaked up all the information he was given. He made sure that the panda bear was tightly close to his chest. Light noticed that a few of them were starting to grow curious about the stuffed animal. If they were as highly intelligent as he was, they would try and use this against him.

Soon they had arrived at an office on the first floor. Light glanced a little around the office with curiosity. The office was neat with a lot of bookshelves. The bookshelves were stuffed with books of different sizes.

'_It feels more like a personal library than an office.'_ Light thought as he continued to stare at the books.

"Ah, you must be the new boy Watari has told me about." A voice snapped him out of the staring.

Light lowered his gaze on another old man with receding hair and small glasses over a big nose. At the same moment the boy wished he could run out of the office, but knew that would be rude.

"My name is Roger. I am manager of Whammy's when Watari isn't around." The old man turned to Watari. "Have you already given him a new name?"

"Yes. I've decided Kinship should be a good one." Watari gently patted the boy's shoulder.

"That is a good name." The old man smiled.

"However, I think this boy should be evaluated during his stay here."

"You want him to stay in that room when he first arrives?" Roger frowned.

"No, not that room. He'll immediately stay in his roommate's room like any other child here. What I'm saying is to have the teachers keep an eye on his behavior. He's usually quiet, but the cause of it is the emotional trauma. And if he's provoked enough he will fight." Butler Man elaborated.

Roger nodded in understanding.

"I'll get to work on informing the teachers. Do you have a roommate in mind, Watari?"

"From the start I was thinking of a couple but now my mind is set." Watari smiled.

Light did not like the smile.

=3=

"Your roommate goes by the name Music, Mu for short. He's ten years old, and he's currently the closest one to your age. Everyone else is either five and under or thirteen and up." Roger told the boy.

Earlier Watari had to check up on someone, so he left Light with the other old man. The boy didn't mind _too_ much. What he did mind was why both men were so hush hush about the reason why Watari had to leave. Light didn't bother to pest them with questions. If they didn't want to tell him then there's no reason to ask questions.

Plus, Light had other things to worry about.

'_My roommate is called Music? Really? What kind of orphanage is this that renames the children with simple names? And I thought Kinship was bad enough already…'_ Light frowned.

"During your stay here, you must speak in English. You must not speak in your native language, not while you remain here at Whammy's anyway. I know you have some difficulty with English, which is why we're going to fit two English classes in your schedule. Your roommate, Music, should inform you of all the information about the daily schedules." Roger explained.

'_Two English classes?'_ Light absolutely hated the idea.

=3=

"Music, I've brought your new roommate." Roger knocked on a door.

From the other side of the door Light heard some rustling as if someone was desperately trying to clean the room in four seconds flat. After a few moments the door opened to reveal a boy a little taller than Light.

The boy had dirty blond hair and green eyes. Normal, Light thought, until he saw the rather large headphones draped around his neck, and a faded out 80's rock band shirt. Light didn't understand the words, for they were faded and it didn't help that he had trouble reading in English. Hearing wise the boy was ok, however he had difficulty reading and understanding the language seeing as how he had thrown the English test Watari had given him to the floor.

And there was also the fact that he'll be given two English classes. Although Light thought it was absurd, but he had no say in the matter. Plus, maybe he could bear with it and learn as quickly as he could. The faster he learned, the quicker Light will advance and two English classes will no longer be needed.

"Hello! I'm Music, some call me Mu." The soon to be new roommate grinned.

Light didn't reply. He just stared blankly at the other boy.

"Music, this is Kinship. Kinship is still healing from some emotional trauma, so he doesn't talk much. I was hoping that you will be able to help him out of his shell." Roger introduced for Light.

The grin Music wore disappeared. He no longer seemed as carefree as before.

"…He's not violent, is he?"

"No, so long as he's not provoked. From what I've seen so far Kinship is shy, and he's a little scared of his new surroundings. Oh, don't look at me like that. I've been managing this place for many years. I know how to catch all the little details." The old man smiled kindly at Light's mock glare.

The small boy huffed and looked away, as if he was letting the matter go. Music's smile came back.

"And he's cute too. At least he knows when to give up." Music reached forward to ruffle the shorter boy's hair.

Light pouted, but didn't complain.

"I trust you will tell him all that will be expected of him?" Roger pressed.

"Sure, sure, I've been wanting a new roommate for the past year now! It's been so lonely without anyone to talk to when I'm cooped up in here." The blond laughed heartily.

Inwardly the younger boy knew that this was going to be a long day.

=3=

"So, you're Kinship? That's a unique name. You must have been something special that you'd be given a name like that." Music commented.

The boy shrugged.

"Huh, Roger wasn't kidding. You really are quiet." Music tilted his head. "Don't worry I won't talk you to death. Oh, and I'm sorry but at the moment Whammy's is going through some financial issues. So there's only one bed in every room in this entire estate. It shouldn't be a problem now, since we're both still small, but it will if we have any random growth spurts in the future."

Light blinked.

"Trust me, there are a couple of roommates on the floor above us that have this kind of trouble. They're older, somewhere in their late teens, and rather tall. With this small bed, well, they fight every other night." The blond sighed with frustration.

"So…why won't we move to a different room?" Light suggested.

Music grinned. "So he can talk! And I've been barking up that tree for months, but there's hardly any room for me or those boys above us to be moved. Before I start explaining how this place works, you can sit down if you'd like."

Light nodded in thanks. The young boy sat down in a chair that was next to a desk covered in never ending stacks of paper.

"Oh, don't mind those. They're music sheets I've printed from the computer room. I'll have to move them somewhere else." Music said.

"Anyway, the rules here are simple. Don't wander off the estate, treat others with respect yadda, yadda, yadda, all of those lame rules. However, there are a few that are absolutely important. One, we must never ask others their background information such as where they lived, who they lived with, what their names used to be, and how and why they arrived here." Mu started with the simplistic rules.

The shorter boy nodded to show that he understood.

"Next, I have to tell you how our school system works. We have two semesters, one fall one spring. Just like a normal school, right? Well, there's a catch. Each semester, depending on our grades and all, we'll be taking classes that suit our needs. For example, I'm advanced in the music class. Therefore I'll be attending the Advanced Music, but then the next semester they'll switch music class with, let's say, a language class. They usually give us four classes in the winter, then six in the spring. I have no idea why they did this, but it's their rules."

Once more Light nodded for the other to continue on.

"Then, during the summer, we only have one or two classes. The one we _have_ to take has to deal with criminology. I'm sure Watari told you what exactly this orphanage is doing, right?"

The younger boy nodded.

"Good, I don't feel like explaining all of that complicated stuff. So, depending on what the teachers say what our specialties are, we'll take classes of criminology that helps us hone our special skills and help us get better. Meanwhile the extra class is something you can choose, so long as you never allowed your grades to slip lower than a C. If your grades do slip, then you have to retake that class that you were struggling with. That includes others if you were slipping in more than one class."

Light frowned at the thought. It would be tough luck if someone was too overconfident and didn't do anything with their low grades and had to pay for it in the summer. Not that he had anything to worry about. He always had good grades with little effort needed.

"As you can tell by my name, my specialty is music. I love any kind of music from the good ol' rock an' roll with Elvis, the classics of Beethoven, the ever awesome Beetles, to Red and whatever you can think of in the orchestra. I love any kind of music." Mu grinned widely.

Light was tempted to ask if he ever heard of _Sairin: Kata Tsubasa No Tenshi_.

"So, Kin, you wouldn't mind if I called you Kin right?"

The shorter boy contemplated. Kin was already better in his mind compared to Kinship, so he nodded in acceptance.

"Good. I was gonna call you Kin even if you did mind. So, what's your special ability?" The blond tilted his head.

Honestly, Light had no idea. The confusion must have been shown on his face when Mu continued on.

"Oh, so you don't know? How'd you do with the tests Watari gave you?"

"Passed."

"With good grades and timing?"

Light nodded.

"Then that's probably why. But the longer you're here, they'll be able to notice where you're strongest at and they can work from there on what to do with you. You'd have to be incredibly smart or have some strong talent they needed in order to get into this place." The blond shrugged. "I can't really give my opinion on what they saw in you until the scores of the tests come around. This, luckily for you, won't be until late December. You've just narrowly missed the summer testing."

'_That's good I guess. It means I won't have to take another English test…'_ Light almost felt like smiling at the thought.

"Now that that's all and done with, shall I give you the tour of your new home?" For whatever reason Mu seemed rather excited, but it didn't bother Light too much. He did live with a little sister, after all.

However, the young boy didn't like the term 'new home'. Eventually Light will feel comfortable enough in this odd place, but he'd never call it home. Especially when they forced a new name on the boy as if they just bought a new horse from an auction.

Light was not their property, nor was he a tool for them to clean and sharpen for their own uses.

Even so, the boy held back his enraged emotions and curtly nodded.

=3=

Death: And the plot slowly thickens! Trust me, the next chapter will be much juicier. L will make his appearance after all xDD And there's gonna be some interesting plot twists, so expect a few things that you'd never think would happen (sadly, yaoi isn't one of them. For a while Light is gonna be a kid)

1) _Sairin: Kata No Tenshi_ is translated into _One Winged Angel_, its an epic theme song of Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII. There are essentially two versions, the orchestrated and the metal. If you're curious about listening to either of them, look them up on youtube.

So please help this bored writer to continue by clicking the lovely Review button and worship this story! Or...just give me your opinion and if you'd like, guess what's gonna happen xD


	3. Fight Or Flight

Death: I apologize for the wait. To make up for your patience I added a surprise or two to this chapter xD

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Please enjoy!

**Chapter 3** Fight or Flight

=3=

Fear is a subconscious tug in the human brain. The mind becomes more aware and cautious of their surroundings and events. There are many causes of fear: trauma from past experiences, watching horror movies while the parents stepped out of the house, or a friend was playing a joke with over exaggerated facts.

Some people worry too much over their fears and within a week their life has already gone downhill. Thus the doctors categorize each fear, calling them phobias and prescribing strange pills to their patients if their phobias are too extreme for the body.

However, fear isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's natural to be afraid of predators that can easily kill humans such as lions, tigers, elephants, crocodiles, pythons and sharks. Being afraid is the key to adrenaline, the body's survival tactic to take a stand or run away.

To say Light had never been afraid is an outright lie. The boy may never admit he'd been afraid, he holds too much pride in showing weaknesses. Some say he's too young for such a high amount of pride, but considering the circumstances of his high intelligence, how can a boy _not_ hold a lot of ego?

In a world of competition, Light had to grab a hold of something that gave him the advantage. He was a small boy, rather scrawny, not so great in strength compared to the other boys at his school. So Light became the lone wolf. A lone wolf that would bite if provoked, but had the advantage of curiosity.

Curiosity was what drew Light to books in the first place. And thus, his knowledge expanded. With such a high understanding of how the world worked, Light started to relay such information to anyone who tried to bully him. His tactic was to talk them to death and get them bored enough to leave him alone.

But being afraid of bullies was not what Light called _true_ fear. To him it was like taking care of a pest problem in the house, only the house was the school playground and the insects were the bullies. And sometimes Light had to keep up the act for several days on end before the bully has had enough of his talking.

Even then some of the other students began to realize that he wasn't talking nonsense. Not only was he alone with no one to call as a true friend, Light was smart. He was years ahead in education compared to the others, and he didn't have any help from teachers.

The other kids became jealous. And the most common events that come with jealousy are more bullying for being a nerd or the brats who try to force him to finish their homework. As if Light would tolerate the brats, let alone do their homework.

What really bothered the boy though was being branded. Everyone would leave him alone because of his name, and his hair being auburn brown had been another slight issue. Once word got around that Light was smart, he'd hear whispers from the other kids when they thought he couldn't hear them.

They'd call him the _nerd_ or the _cheater_. Being branded such things while at the same time Light was the son of a very well respected detective was not something that a boy like him could recover from. To make a living while he was branded by society Light thought that being called a nerd was true fear. He understood with the extreme cases that those who were called nerds would continue to live alone and misunderstood.

No, true fear was _that_ day. It was on that day that Light learned a harsh lesson. The world was violent. And anyone could be a victim, even if a family of a chief detective would be the least likely to be targeted.

At least, that was what Light had thought. But now the boy realized that people have a taste for revenge, and the family of the person who caused havoc to their lives was the easiest target.

From then on, Light saw the world as a fragile place. A lonely, dark place where there was no room for love. This was why Light took his little sister's panda with him. So the memories of that life would remain fresh with him, to keep all the love his family gave him close to him.

He had nothing else to hold on to.

=3=

It had been about a week and a half since Light first moved into Whammy's. At first the boy was tense. He was in an unfamiliar territory, and in a country with different manners and culture. The others had realized early on that Light wasn't in any condition to make friends or polite conversations. They each had an understanding what he was going through, so most of the other children left him alone to give him time to adjust.

Mu, however, made sure to check up on Light as much as possible. The blond knew that the lone wolf types were always easy targets by the older children. To Mu it didn't help matters if his roommate rarely talked. It was an impulse for Mu to step in for the victims, no matter the situation or who the victim was. In a way the blond was doing what any heroes of justice would do, but to Light it would someday be Mu's downfall.

But the hero complex was an admirable trait, one that Light couldn't ignore. Although the boy criticizes his roommate's impulses, it is still something to admire. If someone caught Light's attention, then there was a good possibility that person would become a friend. This was probably Watari's and Roger's intentions, but Light couldn't blame them.

What the boy did despise were his first two classes. They were English, with the same teacher and classroom. So Light wasn't only stuck with the most hated subject, he also couldn't go anywhere when it was time to leave for the next class. This didn't help the boy not liking English one bit.

The schedule is four classes as Mu had explained, so the day starts with two and a half with the first two and then lunch. After two hours of free time and eating lunch are the last two classes in the schedule. By the late afternoon the day is over and the children can do what they wish.

Light actually looked forward to these classes after lunch. Third period was chemistry with a nutty science professor who made the class fun. Although Light had already taught himself chemistry, it was still noted that he had some trouble in the test Watari had given him. Plus the boy had never put his knowledge to the test with labs or from a proper professor than a complicated school book in the county library.

As an added bonus Light was the only child under fourteen in the class. None of them had given him trouble yet, but they all kept an eye on him to see if he could keep up with them. So far they've seen a nice surprise in him. Some of them had admitted to taking a liking to him in the class.

Then fourth period, this was Light's favorite class. This class didn't have an actual name yet, it was still in the experimenting stages. But on his schedule paper it said Self Defense Class. At first Light was confused, but on the first day he was told that each month a professor that specializes in certain self defense techniques teaches the class.

This was a class assigned to the children who were still exploring which they were best at in the physical education realm of the orphanage. There wasn't much property on the estate for major sports, so both Watari and Roger decided to try a more controlled setting for a while. Apparently this class had been one of the few that had survived.

And this month concentrated on jujutsu, a generic martial arts from Japan that use indirect force. The most common techniques are joint locks or throwing their opponent down. However Light understood that jujutsu was to use an attacker's form against him or her and then attack at their weak point.

Jujutsu was a simple means of knocking a number of opponents out of your way without causing too much damage. A good example of this is in one of the popular super heroes, how Batman easily knocks down thugs without breaking bones or any damage to the surrounding area. Although Light would rather use direct techniques, he still had fun in this class. And it was a way to vent out all of his anger from the English classes.

However that still doesn't mean Watari or Roger will get away with his schedule. The whole reason why they gave him two English classes in the morning and then two fun classes at the end of the day was so he wouldn't be angry when school hours was over. By the time the Self Defense Class has ended, Light is too tired and sore to be angry at them.

Oh well, one day. One day when Light has the chance he'll take it. Maybe he could fling food at them or something. Now that brought a smile on the boy's face. That'll work.

=3=

Today was a regular day, and although Light had gotten lost a number of times he was starting to get a feel around the orphanage. So the boy was loosening up a bit, not so tense or sending glares at anyone who came too close for comfort. He was even starting to feel a little normal in this still strange place.

Light had already dealt with the English classes, so the worst part of the day was over. Now that it was lunch, the boy headed off to the kitchens in the first floor. It was a routine he built up. Go to the kitchens for his lunch, eat what the cooks gave him and then head to the library down the hallway. The cooks were all women who had a soft spot for cute things, and the first sight of Light they awed him anytime he came by.

They treated him nicely, and they didn't seem bothered that he didn't talk much. In fact they were the ones who did all of the talking while the boy just nodded and accepted their free lunch and small treats. Many times they compared him to a little lost kitten (which didn't bode well in Light's opinion, but he didn't want to be rude about it and lose the free lunch deal).

Light entered the kitchen as usual and one of the cooks gave him a bright smile.

"The little kitten is back!" One of the women announced.

"Hello there, hun! How are you today? I hope you like sandwiches. We've got a bunch of them today." Another woman cooed.

Light only nodded with a small smile. The women awed at his adorableness while one of them gave him a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The boy accepted it with a bow to show his gratitude, at which the women cooed at him more. The one closest to him patted his hair. Light pouted, but didn't protest.

Once they stopped giving him their attention Light quietly left the kitchen. As he made his way to the library the boy ate his sandwich. He had to say – it wasn't half bad. Although the boy had sandwiches that had lettuce, tomatoes and other strange stuff served from the cafeteria at his previous school Light had never eaten a peanut butter and jelly.

'_I guess I could get used to this, however odd their choice of food and beverages are.'_ Light thought as he finished the last bite of his sandwich.

And just in time. In front of the boy were the doors to the huge library. Light eagerly walked in and headed straight to the foreign language section. Even though he couldn't speak in his native language, there were no rules about _reading_ the language he was most comfortable with.

Besides, reading books in Japanese helped Light grow accustomed to this new environment. Combined with the books in Japanese with the panda bear, brought a strange sense of calmness to the boy. It was as if he hadn't left home whenever he took a book into his hands, or went to bed cuddling the stuffed animal to his chest.

Of course there had always been a slap of reality once it was time for third period or waking up to start the day. The first few days were exceptionally hard for Light to adjust. However with a little nudge to the right direction from his roommate, the boy was slowly and gradually getting over it.

But today was different. Light knew something was off however he couldn't identify what it was. So he brushed it off as a bad feeling, or just him being paranoid again. Once he grabbed a book and sat down in his favorite chair and began reading the bad feeling went away.

Or at least at first it did.

It came to no surprise that a few minutes later, someone sat in the empty seat next to him. Light ignored the newcomer, not even granting the stranger a side glance. The boy grew accustomed to people randomly sitting next to him in an attempt for small talk. Light didn't care in the slightest, and never spoke in return to the curiosity of others.

"So, you're the new kid everyone's been talking about." A rough, male voice spoke. "You're quite small for being eight. Then again I have abnormally long limbs for my age."

Alarms went off in Light's head. The screams and scent of blood started to flood his senses. Light tensed as the episode began, doing his best to remain as calm as possible. Slowly the boy raised his gaze from his book to the older boy.

The coppery aroma invaded his nose like a tidal wave. It hit him with so much force that his calm façade faltered. The calm, collected mask he had carefully sculpted was cracking from just one look at an older boy. And a rather odd looking boy at that.

Just as the elder said, he had extraordinarily long and thin limbs. He had a plain long sleeved shirt with a pair of pants possibly two sizes too big and obviously made many trips to the washer machine. The elder boy had pale, almost unhealthily, pale skin that contradicted with his unruly dark hair.

What really got to Light, were the eyes. The scent of blood became unbearable, and the screams seemed to grow a higher pitch in his head when his honey brown met crimson.

'_Those eyes aren't human…'_ Light cringed when the other leaned closer. The boy wanted to scream and run, but the other's gaze made him freeze like rabbit being cornered by a starved wolf.

_"Yue."_

For a few moments Light didn't respond. It took some two minutes for the boy to realize that the teenager had whispered, almost too quietly into his ear, in Japanese. He could practically _feel_ the other's smirk next to his ear.

"_Yue. That is your name, is it not? Certainly beats Kinship, in my opinion."_ The older boy chuckled, a sound that sent shivers down the boy's spine.

Abandoning all rational thinking, Light threw the book he had been reading straight into the other's face. Somehow the creeper fell to the floor with a loud thud and an undignified yelp. The boy took his chance and ran to the entrance of the library.

"Hey! Get back here! I only wanted to play with you, little robin!"

'_Robin!'_ Light didn't have time to dwell over the nickname as he nearly skidded into the wall opposite of the library doors. He was so frightened that he hadn't realized he was running so fast.

He heard another shout from the older boy, and the screams in Light's head increased in volume. Frightened and confused the small boy darted out of his attacker's lunge. He was pretty sure other children nearby were shouting, but Light wasn't paying any attention. All he wanted was to stay away from that boy. He wasn't one to believe in the supernatural; however the boy believed that there was seriously something _inhuman_ in that strange boy.

Light was just about to turn a corner when he was suddenly grabbed around the waist. The boy let out a shrilled scream that echoed throughout the building. A pale, spidery hand immediately covered his mouth. Upon contact the boy bit the palm of his attacker's hand, now thrashing with his arms and legs.

"Ow!" The older boy withdrew his now bleeding hand, his hold around the smaller boy's waist lessoning just a bit.

But the weakening grip was enough for Light to squirm and wiggle his way out of. The moment he fell to the floor, the boy sent a hard kick to the other's stomach. The teenager flew back into the wall with a grunt.

From here on, Light didn't know what was going on. Suddenly hands came out of nowhere and grabbed him. Still in his blind panic the boy struggled, biting into flesh if hands or arms came too close to his face. Light didn't register the words that were whispered to him, the words of comfort were not taking effect in his brain.

It was as if someone turned off the sound. Light couldn't hear anything beyond the screaming. He wasn't sure if it was his screaming, but the screams that haunted him was all it took to keep on struggling. The scent of the older boy's blood mingled with the blood of his parents, the scent that had never fully gone away. The combination of his attacker's blood and Light's screams confused him from reality and the horrors he had witnessed.

Then he felt a pinch in his neck and within seconds his world went black.

Watari hated to resort in using a sedative drug on a promising student, however he had no choice. It didn't take a genius to figure out that there was no sense of calming the frantic boy down using words or comforting gestures. Something had set the boy into a blind panic, and being grabbed by other children to prevent further injury to both himself and the older teenager didn't help matters.

The elder man cradled the eight year old into his arms, mindful to be gentle in case Light had any unforeseen injuries. Once the boy was secure, Watari sent a worried glance to one he suspected was responsible for all of this.

"Beyond, I want you to head straight to the nurse's office. Once you're patched up, stay there until I come and get you. We can discuss your punishment with Roger later." Watari stated firmly before taking his leave without giving the trouble maker a chance to protest.

=3=

Light woke up several hours later. It took his groggy and slow mind to realize he wasn't in the bed he had grown accustomed to the past few weeks. This bed was softer, more comfortable compared to the one in his bedroom.

The boy lazily opened his eyes to the sight of a medium sized room. To Light the room seemed bigger than his own, but not by much. There was certainly more space for the queen sized bed he was currently occupying.

Slowly Light sat up. His limbs felt heavy, and even though whatever was given to him wore off he still felt calm. However this type of calm seemed somewhat forced. It wasn't the kind he felt whenever he read a book in Japanese, or cuddling with his panda.

"Welcome back from the dead. You were in such a deep sleep I've wondered if you would ever wake up." A smooth voice spoke.

It was then that Light realized he wasn't alone in the room. Sitting with his knees tucked awkwardly to his chest, sat another teenager. The younger boy tilted his head, he recognized this stranger as the one who frightened him. But there was something different about this young man.

"…Who are you?" Light asked, not immediately realizing he had spoken in Japanese. One couldn't blame him, for he was drugged with a sedative and probably something that made him calm. Although his mind was fuzzy, Light was still able to conclude that this side effect was not from the sedative.

The other boy finally turned his gaze at Light. Instead of an intimidating red gaze the boy stared into a pair of soft, yet still firm, dark grey eyes. For the first time in weeks Light felt secure. It seemed as if those eyes were looking straight through him, and for once the boy felt that he was finally being accepted and understood.

"Oh? You saw right through me, it seems. Many thought I was Beyond, he's the rude one you met, while others thought he was me. It's a game, you see. No one has been able to see right through our playful and harmless scheme. So tell me, how did you know I wasn't the one who attacked you?" It was the older boy's turn to tilt his head curiously, eyes unblinking.

Light blinked. He could name a few reasons, but it was probably expected of him to back them up his logic with evidence. But the elder misread his silence as stubbornness.

"I've heard you hardly speak. I suppose now that I've met you in person, I can see that it's true. How about we switch to your native tongue instead? Judging by your class schedule, you have trouble with English." The elder concluded, thumb now lazily tracing his lower lip.

To say Light was surprised was an understatement. He had been itching to talk in his first language, but was forced to refrain due to Watari's rules.

"E-eh? A-Arigato…" Light furrowed his eyebrows when he realized he didn't know the other's name.

"Eru desu. Hajimemashite! Soshita anata wa…?"

_I'm L. Nice to meet you! And you are…?_

The boy's eyes widened. He wasn't hearing things, was he?

'_Eru? Could he possibly be…?'_

"Eh! D-demo…nai…watashi wa anata ni watashi no namae o iu koto ga dekinai! Soshite, anata wa hontōni Eru desu ka?"

_Eh! B-But…no…I can't tell you my name! And are you really L?_

"How rude." The teenager pouted. "Of course I am L, I don't lie. And at least you're showing some promise. You guard your name well."

Light was now officially confused. What was with the sudden change of subject? And what did he mean, 'some promise'? That hurt. It was a low blow to the boy's pride.

"You still haven't answered my question. How did you know that I wasn't B?" The supposed _L_ pressed.

The boy nervously bit his lip. He wasn't sure if there was any way out of this other than telling the truth. What bothered Light was opening up to this teenager, when he hardly knew him, and was calling himself _the_ L. It was the most well known name in Whammy's, a name that was looked up to with admiration among the other children.

"I…I don't hear the screams, nor the smell of blood. You don't remind me of the horrors I saw." Light answered truthfully now switching back to English.

"And that's what you thought of, when you met B?"

The younger boy nodded. He thought that by now the questions were over, but L surprised him with another.

"Dakara watashi wa anata o omoidasa seru nodesu ka?"

_So what do I remind you of?_

Although Light felt safe around this young man, he felt his protective walls building up around him. He did not like to be questioned, not when he feels like he's being poked and prodded as if he was some new specimen. These questions made him feel uncomfortable and he didn't understand why L kept switching between two languages randomly.

"Anata ga…Anata wa panda omoidasa seru."

_You…you remind me of a panda._

Another pout made itself known on L's face. But this pout was different, sort of more like a kicked puppy. Something bubbled up inside Light's chest, starting first in the chest. The bubbly feeling then worked its way up to his throat. And then he was unable to stop a smile being formed, soon went into a giggling fit that was followed by laughter.

It was the first time he had laughed in approximately two years.

=3=

Death: I am unsure if the grammar is correct, I kinda had to use Google translate in order to get those sentences. I just wanted to experiment with writing a different language in a fanfic. I doubt this'll happen again though, unless I feel like throwing in more _Arigato_, which means 'thank you'. And maybe even _Ashiteru_, which means 'I love you'.

Anyway, yes, Beyond Birthday makes an entrance. His part is probably a bit rushed, however I feel that it still works somehow. But I get the feeling most people would be more excited that L has met Light xDD After all, this is only the first step for these two to fall for each other x3

Oh! Before I forget, L's name in Japanese is _Eru_, since he only goes by a letter it's short and if said really fast it sounds like _L_. Also, for those of you who don't know what _Yue_ means, it means 'Moon'. And initially Light's name in kanji is written as _Yue_. If you have seen Death Note the Movie, with the part where Misa tilts her head cutely when she first sees Kira and asks, "Moon?", that there is a perfect example. Which makes me wonder how they read Raito from Yue...

So! Please leave a review! I appreciate the feedback, comments and opinions x3


	4. One Mistake Was All It Took

Death: Phew. Well so far the college life is doing okay, however in the next few weeks I have a feeling that things will be busy, busy, busy. So busy I'll be too tired to work on the next chapter. I've been so nervous, I managed to let it all out on this chapter and thus, I was able to post it faster. As a bonus I made this chapter really long! And the plot is finally going along its way that I wanted.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Please enjoy!

**Chapter 4** One Mistake Was All It Took

=3=

Although Light never had anyone to call a friend, he understood the concepts of friendship. For anyone to be his true friend, they have to first accept and understand him for who he was.

Since Light was socially awkward, it was difficult for him to keep up a conversation. He truly didn't understand how to act or what to say if anyone earned the title of friend. Light can understand how others thought and acted, however it may take some time to accept someone for who they were.

But that doesn't mean someone can easily become his friend. To fully understand Light, they first had to accept his competitive streak. The boy was very competitive, and it was hard to keep it under control. Light's competitive behavior hadn't made itself known yet, since he'd been forced into unfamiliar surroundings and strange people.

Light had clammed up, and it was one of the reasons why his behavior had been quiet and polite. This mask of politeness was always there. However there are instances where his stubbornness gets in the way. Light couldn't help that he would act on his competitive side, for the results always made him feel less of a freak.

But there was a chance that once the boy has grown used to this new environment, he won't be so clammed up. And Light knew that he would cause more problems to Roger and Watari, even when he didn't mean to. But this was just a part of the boy, and a side he preferred over the scared and frightened side he had been for the past week and a half.

Light knew that the polite mask was always there to stay. Whatever kind of person he was, there had always been a polite and out of the way side to him. It could have something to do with the way he was brought up, but Light believed it was more from seeing his parents set a good example.

Like any other son the boy looked up to his father. Soichiro was the only person Light admired, and even though he was dead Light still admired him. His father had been strong as well as loving and doting towards his family. Soichiro had been the kind of man Light always wanted to be.

Then that day happened.

Seeing his father's body lying on the floor, covered in blood made an impact on the young boy. He was too young to see his parents that way, and he knew it could take years to recover. Somehow Watari knew this from the first moment they met.

He didn't know how Butler Man knew. The old man just knew, and that was enough for Light to follow through the elder's plans. From the first day Watari knew there had been some problems with Light, and he was setting up a plan in hopes to set things right for the boy.

Light didn't like the idea of being fixed, however. The boy was never one to enjoy being helped, he would rather work his way through his problems by himself than receive any kind of help. There were a few times with the homework that Light had trouble with, but he refused his mother's help. He was that stubborn.

But for now Light will indulge with Watari's wishes. Who knows, maybe this will be for the best. However, if there something went wrong then Light will do everything in his power to mess everything up. He wouldn't use violence, or drag others to his problems. No, the boy would just use the simple action of disobeying.

After all, that's what children are best at.

=3=

Watari walked into his room and paused. He had specifically told L not to walk in and interact with the unpredictable eight year old boy. Just as he was about to scold the teenager, the old man realized that Light was actually _smiling_.

It wasn't forced either. The smile on the boy's face was genuine. This had been so unexpected that the elder man stood where he was, watching as the boy he thought of as a son taught a potential child how to play chess. The image before Watari brought a fond smile of his own.

"So, Kinship, are you enjoying your stay at Whammy's so far? Besides the Beyond incident, I mean." L inquired.

"Well…" The boy lowered his head.

"Hm?" L tilted his head.

"I'm still trying to adjust. But I'm starting to like it here…a bit." Light answered, he couldn't really lie to L. He was a worldwide detective, so there was no point in lying or avoiding his questions.

"I see. You miss your family, and the life you had with them. I know what that's like." L raised a thumb to his lips. "However that doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy your stay here. Whammy's a safe haven for children, as well as giving them all the opportunities to live the life they wish. Every child here dreams to do something. What do you dream of, Kin?"

The question surprised Light. For whatever reason he didn't feel uncomfortable with the personal questions anymore. It could be because there was something about L that made him feel safe. Though to be honest, Light had never thought of what he wanted to do.

Watari used this moment to set some different varieties of snacks on the table. He had been listening quietly while preparing the snacks in the kitchen. Watari had prepared three sets of trays on a tray stand, one side with fruits and small sandwiches while the other side offered numerous sweets.

Once the snacks were served, Light instantly took the chance to avoid answering and grabbed a sandwich. Even L was distracted, the calling of his favorite sweets were too strong.

"Thank you, Watari." L said before stuffing a cookie into his mouth.

"Arigato!" Light quickly added.

The urge to scold the young boy about speaking in his native language swelled in Watari's chest. However this was his bedroom, with a shared compartment with L's own room, so they were practically safe. Plus Watari wouldn't put it past L for encouraging the boy to speak in Japanese either.

"Any news yet about B?" L asked as he covered his cookie with some chocolate sauce.

"He'll be serving detention by cleaning the kitchens for the rest of the month."

A smile made itself known on the boy's face. However the smile was short lived.

"And Kinship, you'll be banned from the library for the same amount of time. Although there were no injuries from when you threw a book at B's face, you did however cause damage to the book." Watari ignored the boy's pout.

"Normally I don't grant such punishments, however this time I made an exception. The damaged book was a gift from one of our own professors, in fact he wrote it himself. Sometime in the near future, when he's back to teaching a semester I would like for you to formally apologize to him in person." The old man held his ground against Light's glare with a firm stare of his own.

For a moment or two the child and grown up didn't look away. Eventually the boy gave in and humbly looked away from the scrutinizing gaze. It wasn't as though he was ashamed, but for the fact his stubbornness was taking form once more.

"Kinship, I'll have to applaud you for that. You continue to surprise me, and that is quite hard for someone of your age to pull off. You're the first to ever hold your ground against Watari." L commented, gathering up more sprinkles for an almost overly frosted cupcake.

"Eh? But what about you? You're just as stubborn as I am. How can you not hold your own ground against him?" Light furrowed his eyebrows.

"I don't have to. I merely take his suggestions while formulating some plan on how to take down a criminal. It is important to hear all angles of an investigation. Who knows, you just might find the answer in the most unexpected places." L shrugged off.

"So…what's it like to be a detective?" Light curiously glanced up at the older boy.

"Tiring, but thrilling. It takes a lot of work, but it's just the kind of work I prefer. I'm merely taking a small break for now by visiting Whammy's. It is important to check up on the children and see anyone who has the potential to become the runner up to be L. Why did you ask?" The panda boy stared at Light, as if challenging him to answer.

The boy tensed. He only asked in comparison of his father's work. Before that day, Light had planned to become a part of the department in some way or another. He had shown some interest in criminal profiling or maybe even somewhere in the forensics field.

However Light heisted because he was not allowed to share any information of his background. Although he felt safe with L, Watari was there. Also there could be a possibility L might misuse the information.

"I was just curious." Light saved himself from explaining more with another bite of his sandwich.

L's stare was hard and calculating. The boy resisted the urge to flinch.

"That's twice now that you've avoided a question. People try it once, and many only go that far with me. You're either incredibly brave or you're trying to hide something. I can see that you're stubborn, and you carry a lot of pride around you. However your eyes betray you, there's a very small flicker of guilt when you lie. So I detect a little bit of both from you."

Light gulped. L remembered the question about his dreams? He thought the older boy had forgotten that question after stuffing his face with enough sugary treats that the scent overpowered Light's nose. Apparently he had underestimated the older boy.

"…The answers to both of those questions relate to my background. I can't and won't tell you those answers." Despite what his logical side demanded he surrender, Light refused. L was slowly worming his way into the boy's head, gradually earning himself a spot as a friend.

Even if the boy's chances of becoming a friend in L's eyes grow slim because of his answer.

"…Once more, you've caught me off guard. I'm beginning to think I've found a friend in you, Kin."

Light blinked. Did he hear that right?

"But I still like to know those answers. So maybe sometime in the future, once you've graduated from Whammy's I can try again. If we're on equal grounds, you might be able to willingly trust me more." L grinned from ear to ear, as if he _knew_ that it will happen.

Somehow Light felt that it will too. But that doesn't mean he wouldn't put up a good challenge.

"You better not cheat and ask Watari about me. I won't immediately answer to questions, as you've already seen. And that's the same with people calling my name for my undivided attention. I like to do whatever I please. I am not as obedient as I claim to be, and you saw right through my mask. I have to say that's a first." Light smiled back, feeling quite satisfied with the challenge he set up.

"Me, cheat? Normally I would, however I will make this an exception. But I will conduct this little challenge of yours like any other investigation. In the meantime, would you like to spend your lunch time with us for the rest of the month? Now that you're banned from the library, I imagine you'll be quite bored. Plus, I'd like to know more about my first friend." L suggested playfully.

"Sure. And you don't have to worry. I don't plan on telling everyone you're here. I can be selfish sometimes." It was not a statement, but a promise.

"You're young, I think you have every right to be selfish."

And that was how Light made his first friend.

=3=

L watched his new friend leave with a sudden longing. When Watari had told him not to interact or even show himself to Kinship, well the young detective was curious. He of course knew that the boy had some sort of break down that turned violent. But despite his appearance L could take care of himself quite fine.

If there had been any danger all L would have to do is hold Kin down on the bed. The boy was eight years old and quite small too. Though it wasn't the boy's fault, it was rather that the fact he was Japanese. L had suspected Kin as such the first moment he entered the room, however it wasn't confirmed until the boy spoke the language.

And the boy was interesting. He may have a lot of ego, but that was what drew L in. He had never seen one so young hold so much pride. And yet he found it surprising that the boy wasn't too happy about being at the orphanage. L loved it here, and so should every other child that comes here.

"Watari, I would like to make a request." L spoke softly.

"Yes?"

"I would like for Roger to keep an eye on Kin's progress. I sense that he just might be the one."

"Even if there's a possibility that something might be wrong with him? From what I saw when he had his break down, there is a very good chance he has some psychological issue. It would be best if he's tested as soon as possible." Watari was concerned, but even he couldn't deny that the boy had potential either.

"I'm afraid I will have to disagree. All that boy needs is a few anger management classes, as well as some martial arts classes during his entire stay here. That way he could vent out his anger through physical exertion. So long as those classes stay with him, he should be fine. If he's tested too quickly, and too young, I fear that we've lost our chance with him. To point out that something is wrong with him may have a major impact on his pride." L countered, stacking up sugar cubes.

"And you believe that will happen?"

"I'm sure you've noticed this too, but Kin is all about pride. If he's guided properly and efficiently, then he will be a great asset for us. However if something were to go wrong, I can see that he'll take it too seriously. He has the potential to become L, yet, at the same time he has the potential to become the greatest opponent L would ever face."

As if proving a point, L flicked one of the sugar cubes of his tower, causing the cubes to tumble and scatter on the table.

Watari nodded gravely.

=3=

For the rest of the month the boy's behavior changed drastically. He was becoming less stressed and quiet. He was slowly growing out of his shell and joining in conversations. It all started in the classes, but soon Light was comfortable enough to speak outside the classroom to other children.

However none of them were as interesting as L. As promised the boy never spoke of L's presence to anyone. He didn't even tell Mu, who had been nosey as to where Light had been taken to when he had been knocked out. When the blond figured that his roommate wouldn't tell him any details, Mu reluctantly dropped the subject.

So each day during lunch, Light would show up in L's room for another game of chess. Each day seemed to vary on who would win. One day it'd be L, the next Light was the one who proudly said "checkmate". During each visit the winning seemed back and forth, like some mental tug of war between two bright boys.

And while L learned more about the boy, Light secretly began to understand the strange boy. He understood that L was rather lonely with his job, which Watari took notice and offered the young man a break to visit Whammy's. And so Light took it upon himself to use this small window of opportunity to make the other smile every day until it was L's time to leave.

Time had flown by so fast that neither had noticed that the time for L to leave had almost arrived. One day, while they were playing chess, Light noticed something.

"Your favorite pieces are the white knights." The younger boy stated.

Surprised, L tilted his head, not expecting such an observation. During each of these games L had always played as the white pieces, while Light the black pieces. The younger boy didn't seem too bothered at all with the arrangements.

"Oh? Why would Kin–kun think that?"

"Well, the obvious. The knight pieces move in an _L_ shape, and they can move backwards and forwards. The knights can take up on defensive or offense tactics, and you have no problem switching between the two. However if we compare this chess board and its pieces to the real world, then there's more to the knights."

"Please explain." L encouraged, reaching for the tiny panda cookies with chocolate filling.

"Think of the pawns as everyday people, the castles the countries, the bishop the head of justices department, and the king and queen the head of the said countries. The knights resemble L, and his future successors. In medieval times the knights were the carriers of justice. They followed the orders of a noble or the king in the name of justice, or in that time, God. Now let's say this stray pawn," Light motioned to a random black pawn. "This pawn becomes a criminal, a dangerous criminal that posed a serious threat to the bishop."

As emphasis, the young boy moved the black pawn closer to a white bishop, ignoring the rules of chess. L didn't question or correct the boy's moves. He was watching intently, albeit curiously.

"And since the bishop is the head of the department of justice's, they need someone to immediately take down that threat to keep order in the government." L tipped over the black pawn.

Light frowned. "True, however, what if the bishop can't defeat and catch this threat? What will they do then?"

The younger boy picked up the black pawn, setting it back into a standing position.

"Since this is the department of justice, they can't turn to the public for help. If the people see their protectors crumble so easily, it will create chaos among the government. And they can't turn to their leaders either, politics cause a major negative impact on investigations and confuse the real facts with lies. So," L moved one of his knights closer to the black pawn. "It is up to L to take down the threat before any real damage takes effect."

"Exactly. L is the symbol of hope, and acts accordingly to justice and carries out all acts to ensure the people are safe. In saying so, L happens to be the modern knight in shining armor." Light smiled proudly at his statement.

"A knight in shining armor…I never thought of myself that way. But I suppose it suits me rather well. However I feel that's only half of what L truly is." The older boy mumbled the last bit to himself.

"How so?" Light furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"L is merely a vigilante. Although essentially, yes, L is comparable to a loyal knight in shining armor, however, knights are loyal to only _one _leader. The knights are never loyal to the people. It's true that the knights protect the people, but as you said earlier, they follow the orders of a noble or a king." L picked up a black knight between his forefinger and thumb.

"There are two sides to L, and one of them is that L is never bound to one country. And thus, L is never bound to one major leader of a country. Think of this side as a vigilante, working only if there's too many innocent people involved or thousands upon thousands of money is at stake. You can call this side of L as the Dark Knight." L said as he set the black knight next to its white counterpart.

"On the outside, L is protecting the people as knights should. But on the other hand L is free to take up on which cases to solve. It doesn't help that I've never shown my face, so there are a lot of people who fear me and distrust my methods. Like any other vigilante, L will be hunted down despite all of the good L had done to the world."

"That's what successors are for." Light added.

"Yes, and that's why this orphanage was established in the first place." Both boys turned to meet the gaze of Watari.

"It's almost time for us to take our leave." The elder reminded the detective.

"Nani…?" Light's eyes widened at the discovery.

'_No, he couldn't leave.'_ The younger boy thought frantically. He finally had someone to really talk to, and now L was being taken away from him.

"I apologize, but my break is over." L confirmed.

"You're leaving now?"

"In a few minutes, yes." The elder boy nodded gravely.

Light had scrambled to his feet so fast L nearly jumped. The boy nearly tripped over the leg of his chair, but managed to regain his balance. Before he ran out he shouted with horror and panic.

"Don't move yet! I have to get something!"

L stared after the running boy with wonder. Kin had always been so composed and he thought he'd never see the boy so frightened. Glancing up at the elder, L silently hoped that they could at least wait until Kin came back. Watari let out a weary sigh.

"All right, but he has five minutes."

Light somehow made the way to his bedroom over the flight of stairs. Upon opening the door the boy paused, inhaling gulps of air. Luckily Mu wasn't in the room, so there wouldn't be much of a distraction. Light scanned the room quickly, and found the object he had been looking for.

The boy quickly grabbed what he came for and left, making sure to close the door behind him as he ran back downstairs. The flight down was easier than going up, but he didn't know how much time was left and Light nearly barreled into a few walls and corners as he weaved his way around the orphanage towards L's room.

The moment Light entered the bedroom he stopped, almost kneeling over gasping for breath. In seconds L was by his side, sitting awkwardly in his usual position.

"You didn't have to run upstairs you know." L made an attempt to comfort the boy, however it didn't seem to have any effect other than receiving a heated glare.

"Are you…kidding me? I had to make it in time…in order to give you…this." Light held up the object he had been holding towards the elder boy.

L blinked at the offered object. There in the boy's hand, was a panda bear.

"You're actually going to give me this?" L pondered aloud.

"Of course! Once you go back to your job, you'll be lonely again. You need this more than I do, so take it. This way you'll have something to hold on to." Light smiled brightly, his honey brown eyes glow a gentle golden.

Something tugged in L's chest. He didn't know what this feeling was. He was never one to read emotions too well. But he understood that this was a rare sight, and he shouldn't turn down an offer from this boy. And carefully L took the stuffed panda with a growing smile.

"Thank you, Kin–kun. I'll keep this panda safe, and I'll treasure it as my favorite strawberry cheesecake."

"L…"

"Hm? Yes, Kin–kun?"

"…Has anyone ever told you that you're weird?"

L pouted, at which Light began to laugh. Soon L joined in on the laughter, his free hand gently ruffling through the younger boy's auburn brown locks. Light pouted at the gesture, but he found it rather soothing. L's touch reminded the boy of his father's, and that made him that much happier.

"But seriously, promise me that you'll come back someday." Light said with a grin.

"I will." L smiled fondly.

Watari watched from the sidelines with a gentle smile of his own. He had never expected that almost a month after arriving at the orphanage Light would give up his precious panda over to L. It was a fond situation that the elder knew the boy will turn out all right.

=3=

It had been difficult for Light to go on without L around. But within no time the boy began to spend more time around Mu, who had become his friend too. It was hard to see the two separated on their free time, the two went everywhere together.

And before Light knew it, time flew by. Days grew into weeks, weeks turned into months, months gradually turned into years. Every day L would be on his mind, always hoping that his best friend would come back and visit. During this time, Light had unknowingly started to earn a name as a possible successor to L.

In truth Light didn't want to be L's successor. L had been his first friend, and he wasn't sure if he'd feel comfortable taking up his friend's position as the world's best detective. It was probably due to his hatred to become L's successor, that he hadn't realized that he had become a runner up as a successor.

Then something changed.

While Light had just turned fourteen, his long time roommate Mu, now sixteen, gave him the news. Mu was going to leave Whammy's for a plan that had been set for him to be in the computer forensics field.

"Why? You're two years younger than you should be to leave!" Light protested.

"I know, and I'm sorry. Apparently I zoomed through my credentials and earned myself an early plan. I know what you're thinking, I can't cancel this plan. I mean, this only happens once in a life time! _Once!_" Mu hissed.

"All right, all right, I get it." The younger teen let out a sigh.

"So…we're still good?"

Light rolled his eyes. "Sure."

"Thanks, babe." The blond grinned, pausing in his packing to give a small peck on his roommate's forehead.

It had become a habit of Music's to give Light little kisses on the cheeks or forehead. And that was as far as Mu was allowed to go, as Light ensured that they wouldn't go so far. True the young teen had grown rather fond of the blond. However he didn't love Mu enough for a kiss on the lips or anything further.

What they shared was on the borderline of brotherly love.

But that did not mean Light did the same in return of his roommate's affections. For reasons only he knew, Light was not particularly the touchy feely type. The young teen was rather the more observant type than affectionate and didn't have a weakness for cute things like Mu did.

Now Mu was moving out. Light was starting to feel that now would be an exception. Deciding it wouldn't be much of a bother, the young teen got up from his seat on the chair towards the blond. Brushing away all nervousness, Light gently pecked his soon to be leaving roommate's cheek.

Mu paused, blinking several times. Then the blond cracked a broad smile.

"I guess that's your way of saying goodbye, isn't it?"

Light didn't respond.

"Well, I better get going. Oh, and Roger wants to see you. Actually he wanted to see you…about five minutes ago." Mu quickly walked out of the room, expecting a rather overreacted shout.

"_What!_ Why the hell didn't you tell me? Mu!" Light yelled.

"Your lovely screams are music to my ears, Kin." The blond laughed, dodging a pillow that was thrown at him.

"See ya in the near future Kin!"

"Yeah, sure, and you owe me!"

"I'll make it up to you some day!"

And a roll of his eyes, Light made his way to Roger's office. The teen walked in with a young boy with white hair and pale skin that rivaled L's. Light paused when the thought processed through his mind. The boy was hunched over and twirling a strand of curled hair between his fingers.

"Ah, glad you've finally made it Kinship." Roger said, however Light wasn't paying too much attention.

The teen was too focused on the pale boy between them. Dark, round eyes stared up at the teen with an unreadable expression. Those eyes were identical to L's, but held a dull and blank stare. L's eyes had a little more emotion, especially when he's calculating what's going on through someone's head.

"You needed to see me, Roger?" Light looked away from the boy to the old man.

"Yes, I wanted to introduce you to your new roommate. This boy is Near. He's in league with you and one other boy, Mello, as L's successors."

For a few moments Light stared unbelievably at Roger. He was on the path as a successor? When did this happen? Why wasn't he informed? Light knew he was excellent, but he never thought that he'd be good enough as L's successor.

"Kinship?"

Light tensed, eyes narrowing dangerously at the old man.

"I'm sorry, but I refuse to be in the competition to be L's successor."

They made a mistake. And now was the time for Light to act upon it. The teen will give it everything he's got in order to get his message across.

Children are best at defying grownups after all.

=3=

Death: Yes! It is now the beginning of Light's teenage years. Again I feel that this seemed to be a little rushed, but I just really wanted Light to move on from a child to his early to mid teens. I don't want this plot to drag on, I wanted this to get under way. The last thing on my mind is if this lasts longer than the Last Shisou Vampire, which I still have to **_really really really_** update...

So! Please leave a review. Although I enjoy all the Favorites and Author/Story Alerts, however my goal is feedback! I love reading reviews of you guys and it helps me keep going with my stories. And I promise I'll do what I can to make room to work on my stories while I'm adjusting to college. Thank you for reading!


	5. Behind Those Eyes

Death: I apologize for the wait. First semester of college and was just adjusting and would've have finished this sooner if it weren't for my english class. I worked on a very good essay, one that took four weeks. And I got an A on it! My first A on an essay.

Wanna know the best part? The subject was about epidemics, and mine was about Death Note. Yes, Death Note. It was very fun writing it.

Disclaimer: I think it's obvious that I do not own _Death Note_. That right is solely on Ohba-sama and Obata-sama.

**Chapter 5** – Behind Those Eyes

=3=

Change, Light had realized, is the major factor of life. Some change can be good but others not so much. Light learned a harsh lesson about change; change can't always be prevented.

This shock of reality changed his views as well as his values. Light no longer saw himself as a prodigy compared to when he was in school. His pride as a prodigy was still intact, but his values were no longer about himself. In fact the first few weeks at Whammy's Light didn't have any idea what his values were.

Until he met L.

L opened a whole new world to Light, giving him a different view of life. Light's values shifted from himself to the people around him, the people who were closest to him. L and Mu were the two main catalysts of Light's change of values and views of life.

L had been the first catalyst, with his ability to wiggle his way into Light's head and interpret what's going on. His ability to do so helped L have some understanding of the child that held so much promise. L didn't know the full details of the horrors the boy had seen, and he didn't need to, for the screams and blood Light had willingly informed him was enough.

Although L helped Light out of his shell, he couldn't remain at the orphanage forever. Light understood, L's work is very demanding and he rarely takes breaks to begin with. The boy was selfish when it came down to knowing L as L, but not when it comes down to the elder boy's work. He respected L enough not to be too selfish. But when L left, this was when Mu came into the picture.

Mu was the second catalyst because of his persistence to remain by his roommate's side. Even some of Mu's values have been borrowed into Light's own world. He didn't have the hero complex Mu had, but he did share some of the same sentiments to the weak. L changed the boy's views while Mu changed his values.

All of this wasn't intentional, just to note. Light's family, especially his father, was his world. Therefore, Light shared the same values and thoughts as his father, Soichiro Yagami. He shared the same sense of justice, the same views of the world, and the same values of work. However for some odd reason Soichiro Yagami's values of his family did not, in fact, become part of Light's world until _after_ he was taken into Whammy's House.

It wasn't that his father neglected such values. Light knew his father loved his family very much. But it was the _examples_ Soichiro had been expressing unknowingly to his son. Light only saw his father late in the afternoon or dinner time during the week. There were times when his father wasn't home for the weekend, or didn't even come home for long periods of time when he worked heavily on an important case. From the eyes of a child, Light only saw that perhaps, to Soichiro, work was more important. To be more bizarre, Light's understanding wasn't negative as most children would have reacted.

But it was all the facts Light put together himself. He made an assumption, which by this age he didn't understand that not all assumptions are correct. He didn't understand the values of family until after he lost his own. Vengeance reared its ugly head, and although it had been unfortunate that it happened to a brilliant child with a loving family, Light would have never learned that such values of his family were important in life.

Somehow L understood this, and he found it incredibly sad and ironic. He gently worked around Light's ideas of the world, getting to know what was going on inside the boy's head. At first he may have been slightly manipulative, but once he actually got to know the boy, he started to see a friend in Light. And when L was removed from the picture, Light turned to Mu as his source of comfort, which L knew it could very well happen. Mu unknowingly took L's place as the start of Light's recovery process.

Looking back, Light realized that L had been very sneaky. He had been sculpting the boy towards perfection, nudging him to the right direction. And it all happened because L had been simply _curious_ of the boy. Watari had spoken well of the boy, he told L that the newest addition had incredible potential. And because of his curiosity, L found himself a friend.

And now Mu had left. Light knew it would happen at some point, but what really bothered him was the fact he was labeled as a possible successor to L. He was the runner up, the first of the three children at Whammy's that were competing to become L's choice, L's backup, and L's successor.

Not only did Light feel incredibly pressured from all sides, he was frustrated by the fact Roger didn't consult him if he even wanted to become a competitor to become L's heir. And to add salt to the wound, his new roommate was a mere _child_, one of the other two competitors. Light would be watched by a competitor, when he felt calm and relaxed when he was in his room. He felt his privacy was going to be invaded and he had no say in the matter.

Change could be a good thing. However, this change in his life, Light absolutely loathed. It was as if he didn't have a voice, when in fact Whammy's House was perfecting him to have a voice, a powerful voice that should be used. What was the point to be perfected, when he couldn't even use his voice at Whammy's? It was as if he was mute, as if time decided to turn back to the days he rarely talked.

It was time he decided, to put the abilities they helped him polish into use.

=3=

Both Roger and the boy, Near, stared at the teen in shock. It was safe to say that neither expected Light to refuse what the orphanage was raising brilliant children for. Many children couldn't handle the pressure, but none have ever, _ever_ blatantly refused. No child especially ever said no to the offer at Roger's face.

But Light held his ground. His intense gaze met Roger's confused and surprised expression. The teen was silently setting his point on the table, and boldly challenging the head of the orphanage to do something about it. And they both knew that Roger could do very little in this situation, Watari and L had warned the elder man about Light's sensitivity and high amount of pride.

"Well, then, I'm sorry to disappoint. It is L's decision, he has the last say as to who could be his successor. He told me specifically that you came first, followed by Near and then Mello. I cannot allow you–"

"Then let me ask you something. How long did you know that I was L's first choice on the list?" Light interrupted, eyes blazing with anger.

Roger gulped.

Out of all of the questions, the old man dreaded that one the most.

"About a week."

Light raised a brow. "How convenient, for if memory serves me right, that's about the same time Mu was given the opportunity to leave Whammy's early for a special plan. So why didn't you consult me about this decision a week ago?"

"…"

"So, what, you sent Mu off so I had no choice but to become this boy's roommate? Is that it? Without Mu, you thought I'd be a lost puppy, am I right?"

Near tilted his head up for a better view of the teen before him. Roger vaguely noticed this, act of interest. As of yet the boy had never shown any interest in other children. He wasn't a mute Kin had been, Near would speak only when spoken to. The boy spoke softly, answering questions from teachers and if he was in the mood, the nagging questions of other children. But he never spoke his own opinions. If anyone asked what he thought, Near would clam up.

'_At least there is some hope that this could be the right decision.'_ Roger thought.

"However it may seem to you, that is not the case."

Light narrowed his eyes, a dangerous glint in those eyes sent shivers through Roger's body. Just what exactly had he gotten himself into? Before the old man could ponder over the situation further, the teen turned and left. Even as the door closed behind him, the room felt about ten degrees colder than it should.

Long moments of silence passed, both still in shock over what had just happened. Near was the first to recover.

"Well that turned out just splendidly, Roger."

The old man only gulped.

=3=

Word spread quickly of Kin's refusal. Many were shocked that someone would even carry out such an action. Some of the children tried to ruffle the teen's feathers, but one look and his reputation to be violent put an immediate stop to the confrontations. That didn't stop the whispers in the hallways, or in the classrooms just before class.

Everywhere Light went, he'd catch whispers of disappointment. They all thought he was a freak, and treated him as such. No one would speak to him. When he happened to sit down at a table or some patch of grass outside the others would move away. It happened even in the classrooms, which made group work frustrating.

It got so bad Light decided to just skip all of his classes. In a way he'd kill two birds with one stone. He'd avoid the stares, the whispers, and the awkward behaviors of the other students while at the same time he carried out his plan of rebelling. But just to be on the safe side Light would show up on test days. To the professors who kept an eye over him were amazed he passed the tests even though he didn't show up in class.

He didn't mind about the social status change, either. He was used to such treatment. He can tolerate being alone, Light preferred it that way. It still hurt his pride about the social change, but he can survive without it.

And despite his refusal, Roger wouldn't cave. Light was immediately moved into the same room as Near. Their bedroom was on the first floor near the kitchen, with better furniture and actually made for two people. There were even two beds on either side of the room with a bedside table between them.

Light found the albino kid even more infuriating than the other children. The boy never spoke, and when he did he spoke softly with a stoic expression. His round eyes always followed him whenever he was within the vicinity. Those eyes unnerved Light the most.

They were too much like L's.

But there was one major flaw between Near and L. Unlike L, Near's eyes were expressionless, vague. L had an intense determination in his panda eyes while the boy's were blank. Although they were the same shape and color Light didn't see Near as L. He didn't fall for the trap.

Light couldn't stand those eyes. He didn't like how they followed him when they were in the same room. He didn't like how they remained solely on him, never straying. So the teen made a goal to avoid Near as much as possible until curfew. After a month this goal had easily grown into a routine.

When he caught even a glimpse of white hair and pale clothes Light would immediately walk back the way he came from. In a way the teen had become paranoid of the sight of the boy, yes, a _simple boy_ – Light had no idea what had become of his mind.

At the time Light questioned what was wrong with him a strange event occurred. He happened to walk by an empty study room, on his way towards the library. The door was slightly ajar, and just as he walked passed he heard strange noise. Curious the teen paused and discreetly peered inside.

Honey brown eyes widened at the sight of Near on the floor. A blond girl was pulling at the white hair, and Near tried to squirm away for enough distance for a kick at the girl's stomach. But the girl was almost twice his size. The best Near can do was scratch at his attacker's face, which has done nothing to phase the bully.

Before Light could even debate whether or not to help he pushed through the door and tackled the blond to the floor with a loud thud. The kid shrieked in surprise. But her reflexes were quick as she tried to claw at his face. The two rolled on the floor as they tried to gain the upper hand on the other.

Light didn't know what was going on. They were just a mess of limbs and a failed attempt of wrestling. The kid swore colorful words that would give Roger a heart attack if he heard them. At some point the blond sent a flying kick that missed. Instead the foot connected with a bookshelf which in turn knocked down a vase.

At the sound of shattered glass the pair froze. The three strained for any sign of running footsteps. Distant voices from down the hall were heard. Quickly Light and the girl pushed each other away, disgusted. Their eyes met, silently agreeing that this will have to be continued later.

The blond was the first to get up and scram. Light limped to the door, grabbing Near's tiny wrist and dragging the boy out of the study room. The brunette wasn't quite sure where he wanted to go. He just knew they had to get away from the study room with the broken vase.

When they finally stopped Light realized they somehow made it to their bedroom without any witnesses. His leg was hurt after all. It would be suspicious if he was seen limping about the same time the vase broke. And he was sure everyone heard their fight, which probably wouldn't help in their case either.

Once they stopped to catch their breath the teen let go of Near's wrist to sit down on the edge of his bed. That was when Light thought over the even that had just happened.

'_What the hell was I thinking? I don't like this, this – this _boy_! Why did I do that? Damn it, Mu rubbed off on me more than I thought.'_ Light resisted the urge to smack himself.

With a sigh the brunette laid down on his bed. What's done was done, and there was nothing he could do about it. And what's more he has an injured leg, probably a bad bruise, and that he couldn't defeat a little girl.

That hurt the most.

"I don't know what to think of you. I find you annoying, and yet I had the impulse of coming to your aid. You're so puny. Unless you have some kind of weapon I can't see you pull off any defense techniques. If you don't want to be bullied then I suggest you have at least one friend. Someone who will jump in and put a stop to the bullying, it's best for children here are safer in numbers." Light spoke, not caring if Near heard him or not.

"Trust me, I've been there. I used to be like you. But I took it to the next level and never spoke a word. I may have spoken a few times to my roommate and maybe Roger too, but overall I wanted nothing to do with this place. I still don't, actually. But I've come to bear it and move on."

'_What am I doing? Why am I even telling him any of this?'_

"Now that I've been named as a possible _replacement_ I feel that I've been tricked, used, and betrayed. It's as if they're only using us as lab rats to replace L if anything ever happened. When I came out of my shell I thought that I can shape my own future. Instead I've been walking straight into their hands, like a puppet."

Unaware, Near was sitting on the floor twirling his hair. His eyes studied the teen as he listened, soaking up each word and storing them into a nearly empty "Kinship Cabinet" in his head. All this time Near could only gather that Kin was Asian with a very high amount of ego. His behaviors, likes, dislikes, interests, etc. are almost unknown to the boy.

But in this revelation Near came to a new understanding of his roommate.

"You feel trapped, and so you're secretly planning how you can use your abilities to your advantage and make them realize you're serious. For the past month I've been puzzling over why you would refuse to become L's heir, especially when you're his first choice. You hold a lot of pride, so it couldn't be because you're afraid or shy. But now I believe I have found the answer to the puzzle." The boy spoke in a flat tone.

For once Near wasn't speaking softly. Blinking several times Light sat up to meet the boy's calculating gaze.

"In the past you met L. I assume you met him in person and not through the monitor checkups he has every month or two. You hold a lot of respect for L but at the same time you see him not as a goal, or a phantom you can never grasp, but as an equal. He took an interest in you and in return you met him in the flesh. L is who brought you out of your shell. Is that why you feel betrayed? That you made your first friend, who may have guided you like a puppet master just so you can be the perfect puppet?" Near asked, staring unblinking at the teen.

The brunette tensed at the chosen words. Near not only struck a chord that pulled at his chest, but he actually hit the mark. For a moment Light thought the boy was taunting him. But the way he questioned the teen seemed to be out of curiosity, not mockery.

At the realization Light relaxed his muscles. His honey brown eyes narrowed, darkening into a brown as he tilted his head.

"You're trying to analyze me. That's why you've been watching my every move. You're trying to figure out my habits, my behaviors, and how my mind works. I'm sorry, but you've only breached the tip of the iceberg. If you want to understand me then we have to trust each other. I'll be willing if you are, but if you're not then I'm afraid you'll have to carry on without finishing this puzzle. And this will be the only chance I'll give."

For a few moments they stared in silence. Light found it hard to keep eye contact with the boy's cold gaze. His stubbornness helped him stand his ground, not to succumb in the urges of looking away.

"Very well, I agree on your terms. But I would like to add a few of my own. We learn to trust each other on our own pace. We are both stubborn and sensitive, not the best combination between the two of us." Near twirled a strand of his hair between his fingers, his voice a softer tone once again.

"That works for me." Light shrugged.

"Then the first thing I'd like to tell you is that we'll probably be questioned about the fight earlier."

The brunette blinked. "What makes you think that?"

"I left my unfinished puzzle on the floor. And Mello is often the culprit of bullying me."

Light's eyebrow twitched.

'_Just my luck. I help a kid and in turn I'm going to be a person of interest.'_

=3=

Death: Soooo...anyone caught immediately that the blond Light mistook as a girl was actually Mello? I thought it was clever xD Even I mistook him as a girl when I first read the manga in what seemed like long ago x3 Then I read how they referred Mello as male. That was a shocker. I blame his hair and thin body.

Yes, Near actually has a sense of humor. I think that under all of that blunt child-like act, he has some humor about him. Plus, he's a child in this time period, not 15 when he's first introduced in the manga/anime. I thought that he'd probably be a little more open if he knew someone personally and thus trusted them more, or if someone like Light caught his interest. I hope he's somehat in character though, I have trouble with Near and sometimes Mello. Matt is easy, he just sits there smoking or playing on a DS or PSP. Which is stupid in my opinion, the character least known about and he's the easiest to write compared to the two runner ups as L's successors. And I even have trouble with L sometimes.

Oh, and the title of this chapter is named after a name of a song. It's _Behind Blue Eyes_ by 3 Doors Down. Good song, and I didn't have any idea what the title of this chapter should be so maybe in the future I'll use title of songs that suit the chapter well. Heck, the title of this story was named after a song anyway. I thought I should start turning it into a theme.

Anyway, I hope you like. And I hope this was worth the wait, school comes first even if I wished it were not so. So without further ado, please click the lovely review button!


	6. Disturbia

Death: I apologize for the long wait. It will take some time to update some of my other fanfics, since I spent a lot of time on this one. On word doc this was thirteen pages long, when usually a chapter is around eight to ten pages or so. Meanwhile, I hope you enjoy.

Yes, I named the title of this chapter after the song _Disturbia_ by Rihanna.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

**Chapter 6** – Disturbia

=3=

Over the years at Whammy's House, there had been rumors that gradually transformed into stories. Most of them were not comical, or met with a happy ending. To Light these stories were melodramatic and, at the time, exaggerated facts.

As a serious individual by nature Light paid no attention to the rumors of gossip from bored children. He thought they were idly chattering about anything and somehow warped their ideas into a story that was made up. Light preferred to keep up a performance, one that strived to show everyone that he was different than the other children.

His reasons, however, were a little selfish. He secretly sought to succeed the courses in order to apply for a job, namely a forensic artist. He wasn't sure what category to choose from, hence there are four, but Light was starting to lean towards the image modification category. This category specializes with manipulating a photographic image of missing children or fugitives and compile what they might look like at the present time.

Light only took an interest in this field because he wanted to compile his own image of his little sister. Although it'll be difficult from using her face just from memory, but his memories were sharp. In a sense the teen has photographic memory, but it was a talent that made it known only with people who were very close to him.

And Japan was always his home in his heart. Over time Light began to miss what once was. He knew he couldn't brood over those early memories of his family, thus he took upon studying in order to busy his mind. In a way he was killing two birds with one stone. His drive to have the perfect image while distracting his mind from old memories.

And thus, he found rumors to be annoying. He needed to know all of the facts presented to him before adding his own input. If it was just someone stating their own opinions more than actual facts, Light will tune that person out and forget about the conversation altogether.

When Mu had still been his roommate, he made it a mission to know all of the rumors going about at Whammy's. Light didn't know how many times they butted heads over what to talk about, when all Mu wanted was to tell Light about the latest rumor while the latter wanted nothing to do with them.

Eventually, Mu got the message and stopped bringing up the latest rumor when they hung out. And for that their friendship grew stronger, now that Light didn't have to tune out even his only friend at Whammy's.

But there was one rumor that managed to reach his ears. At first, he paid no attention to it. This was one of the few rumors that forever circulated around at Whammy's and became a story.

The story starts with the first generation of the orphanage. It first started with A and B.

A was supposedly a brilliant boy with a good future ahead of him. He was the first to be recommended as part of the Backup Program. A was shy, as most children were, and loved to spend time in the library studying. He studied endless amount of books from within the library, no matter the language or how old the books were.

Then there was B. He was the odd one. He always smiled awkwardly in a creepy sort of way that drove everyone away from him. Apparently he had a thing for strawberry jam, and no matter what other food he was given B will pile enough sugar that would have surely given him diabetes. Somehow B was never diagnosed with that condition, how that was no one would ever come up with the answer.

So as an outcast B also began to hang out in the library alone. He didn't necessarily read books, though. Instead he would just sit in a chair, knees to his chest, and simply watched. He watched the other children, unblinkingly, and devoid of any expression.

And within a short amount of time only A and B were the only ones who hung out in the library. It was during this time that these two came to be known as friends. However, with his only encounter with B to count on, Light didn't believe that those two were simply _friends_.

As described from the rumors, A became less talkative. He had grown more withdrawn, and apparently easily frightened. If anyone would even so much as tap his shoulder A would jump with a startled expression. Light didn't know if that was fact or exaggeration, but he had a hunch that something was wrong. And that something, he guessed, was B.

What happened next was the clincher. A was gradually starting to lose sleep, therefore his grades faltered. At some point it became known that he wouldn't be applicable to become a backup. So before he lost his assigned letter, A committed suicide, dying with what little dignity (if any) he had left.

From that point on the responsibility fell on B's shoulders. At this time, it was noted that B was colder, more blunt, and maybe a little more sadistic. He would smear his toast and coat it with large amounts of jam, and whatever amount that fell off he used as a sort of finger painting on the table. Of what he wrote or drawn with jam on the table, no one knew. And this part of the story Light wasn't quite sure if it was true at all (although he wasn't entirely surprised if B ever did such a thing).

And for whatever reason B would sometimes break away from his routine of sitting in the library and sit anywhere that met his fancy. Of course he still watched the other children, but he went to whatever place at random and never seemed to develop a routine the other children could predict. With given time, the other children at Whammy's grew to ignore his presence completely.

A few times B would show interest in a few of the other children, namely the ones that showed potential. B had the ability to analyze everyone, studying their personality, how they interacted, and how well known they were in the orphanage. If there was gossip of someone who was new and relatively better than some of the older children then B would immediately know.

Then B would secretly follow them. And when he was finally confident enough to know that they weren't just beginner's luck but actual potentials to L, B would make a brief encounter with them.

Whatever was said, no one knew. The children he talked to never spoke a word of what happened. And to make Light even more uncomfortable, all of the potentials he talked to had dropped from potential to average. All except for one, the last potential child B had encountered, Kinship.

Light never spoke a word of what B said. And since he didn't talk anyway, no one bothered to pester him with such questions. Not even the great detective L, who if he wanted to then he could have gotten the answers out of him. However L found a friend in Kin, and decided against the idea in an effort to keep their friendship alive.

Anyway, sometime later, about a year or so, B escaped. He found a way to escape from the orphanage and was never found. Whammy's House couldn't file a missing person's report, as B was too similar to L in appearance and it would be too dangerous (this was Light's own theory, as the other children came up with strange and fictional ideas since they've never met L as L).

The next part of the rumors was what caught Light's interest in the first place.

About the same time he was adjusting with his pale roommate that rumors spread that B was a criminal.

There were no details given, other than that B had become known as BB, or Beyond Birthday. BB challenged L as a criminal, and failed miserably. He was caught and placed into some isolated mental facility with a life sentence without a chance of parole.

When Light heard this news, he walked straight to his room. Once he knew he was truly alone and no one down the hallway, he let out a series of laughs. And Light didn't even know what he was laughing for, or at, or why. He just laughed until his lungs hurt, his insides threatened to spill out, and tracks of dried tears smeared his cheeks.

He laughed so hard he didn't notice the soft footsteps of his roommate, who silently followed him to the hallway, leaving in a fright. And later when Light calmed down he started questioning his own sanity. He didn't know what it was about BB's story that he found so damn funny.

=3=

A year passed quickly for Kin and Near. They gradually adjusted to being in each other's presence, and with the elder teen to prevent Mello from bullying Near their trust deepened. There were times that Kin and Mello would fight physically rather than words of insult.

And no amount of punishment would stop them from starting fights. It was evident from the first time they had detention, after the last day of detention they released all of the tension on each other. It was inevitable, everyone soon realized, considering their personalities.

Kin was the image of perfection. His pride was endless, and he would meet every insult and challenge head on. Kin had a foolish sense of pride and stubbornness that Whammy's did not enjoy as a quality among the children. But the depth of Kin's stubborn pride was not known until now, and it was too late to change him. Once children were in their teens it was harder to control and discipline them.

Mello, although not a perfectionist, he too carried a lot of pride. He was quick on his feet, both physically and mentally. So even though there was about a four year gap between him and Kin, Mello was able to keep up with his rival. The fact he had serious anger issues and was stubborn as a bull didn't help matters at all.

It was apparent after the first few months that although they threw punches and wrestled to the floor, there weren't any serious injuries. Yes, there were some bad bruises, an occasional limp, some scratches, some hair pulling, and a few unfair and uncalled for bites, and rarely there were swollen cheeks. And yet they still walked away with hurt prides, and spent the next few days to a week to recover from their injuries. The moment they were completely healed they fought all over again.

Their fighting became so frequent no one bothered to intervene. Near even started to consider Matt, Mello's best friend, as an acquaintance. They only spoke to each other during the fights, usually Matt doing the talking as he fiddled over his handheld game devices and a small opinion or input from Near.

When a year passed, both Matt and Near felt that their roommates actually _enjoyed_ riling each other up.

They even came up with enough evidence for this claim. When Kin and Mello couldn't find anything else to fight over, they simply used childish insults or any form of excuse to launch a punch at the other at any given moment. Near secretly began to wonder if somehow, in some way, those two would end up being friends. Unless they already did, which is unlikely, they simply didn't acknowledge or admit that this just might be a strange form of friendship.

When Near shared his thoughts of this on one cold February day, Matt only laughed.

"I think they secretly realize that this is ridiculous, and subconsciously they are friends. But they're too stubborn to give up and surrender. I wouldn't be surprised if the only way for them to accept the fact they're friends is if L decides to intervene." The gamer commented with a grin.

Near managed a small smile in return to the statement. That would be true, for Kin saw L as an equal and a close friend. If L insulted him just enough of his behavior, it would shed some light to Kin that he was not the perfectionist he crafted himself to be. And Mello would most likely bow his head as L explained his disappointment to him. It was clear that the blond idolized L as a hero.

Although they knew it would happen eventually, Near and Matt secretly hoped that the fighting and the rivalry would go on just a little bit longer. The drama and the idiotic behavior between Kin and Mello was their only entertainment as of late.

But then a strange event occurred, one that would forever change all four of them. It was a series of subtle changes, actually. The first was shortly after Near spoke of the strange friendship that Kin and Mello would never admit. Roger had requested a sitting with Kinship.

Kinship sat nervously before the old man in the office with the personal library behind the desk. It was strange, in Kin's mind, that the last time he had been here was a year before. And since that last visit the teen went through a major growth spurt. Kin was now long limbed, but he was also well proportioned despite his very long legs.

He was quickly brought out of his musings when Roger cleared his throat.

"Yes?" Kin inquired, blinking.

"As I was saying, I've had enough of these reports and the sounds of your fights with Mello. I spoke with L, and we agreed that you are taken off as a potential heir."

Kin's heart skipped a few beats. Did he hear that right? Had he finally reached his goal?

"At one condition. You have to show us that you're serious. You are to start attending your classes again. I know you have an interest in forensic art, mainly the image modification category. I've scheduled an appointment of someone who specializes in that field that may take you on as an assistant and pupil. He will be coming by in a few weeks, so you have to work hard on this. Do you understand?" Roger gave him a long, hard stare.

Despite the stare that would make anyone else flinch, Kin smiled. "Yes, I understand."

"Good, you are dismissed."

The teen got up and turned to leave. As he was halfway out of the office he glanced over his shoulder.

"Oh, and Roger? Thank you."

Roger blinked, clearly taken aback. After Kin's harsh treatment towards just about everyone the past year he didn't expect the politeness to make a sudden comeback. But it was apparent that Kin was not at a complete loss of his emotions. This shed some hope from within the elder, as he worried Kin's potential would be forever wasted.

"You're welcome." Roger replied, to which the teen nodded and left.

As the door closed, Roger had a sinking feeling about this decision. He hoped that L knew what he was doing with the troublesome child.

The second subtle change was Kin's behavior. He no longer sought Mello out as a means to rile him up and obtain the upper hand. He even completely ignored all of the insults thrown at him by the blond. Instead, Kin was studying and working twice as hard.

Now, because of his boredom, Mello started advancing out his bullying on other children. Or at least he tried to, but they didn't pose enough of a challenge to him compared to Kinship. And Matt was no help with finding a replacement.

None of the others gave Mello the thrill. They gave up too easily. They all backed down at almost an instant he was up close and personal. No, they were not like Kinship at all.

Kin pushed back. He was stubborn, he met Mello's challenge halfway and gave him a fight. Most of the time there was no clear winner, but to the blond it didn't matter who won or not. It was the thrill he was after. The thrill of riling the teen up, the thrill of just fighting to keep his ground against Kin.

And in his boredom, Mello spoke of these very same thoughts to Matt.

"Matt…you're good at keeping secrets, right? I mean, of course you are. You've never told anyone that I stole most of the chocolate from the kitchen." The blond tilted his head.

The redhead simply nodded as he continued to tinker with his PSP. It had recently been acting odd. The PSP kept freezing up every three to five seconds or so. And thus the game genius decided to operate surgery on it to figure out what was wrong. Pieces of the device lay scattered on the table around Matt's area of where he sat.

"Well, I'm tired of just sitting around here, ya know? I mean, no one else gave me a challenge. No one around here stands up to me. Well, besides you, you just bear along with it, but that's beside the point. Anyway, what I'm getting at is, well, I'm starting to actually miss the fights with Kin."

Matt paused in his tinkering. Two things were bothering him. One, Mello was rambling – _yes rambling_ – and two, he just called Kinship by his nickname. As far as the gamer knew, only Near was allowed to call his roommate _Kin_.

The redhead steadily raised his head to meet Mello's questioning gaze. There was something in his blue eyes, a small plead for help, and Matt gave it a chance to bring up Near's theory.

"Mells, have you ever wondered if, by even a very small chance, that you and Kinship are friends?"

Mello tilted his head, slowly eating a bite of his chocolate as if he was considering what he was told.

"…Am I friends with him? I don't know anymore. I mean, he's just…damn it! I get so frustrated whenever I'm around him, and yet, I can't avoid him! It's like, I want to be around him and yet at the same time, he makes me so damn frustrated!" The blond slammed a fist on the table.

Matt merely sighed. It was clearly too early to even suggest such a thing to Mello.

"Or maybe…maybe I get so frustrated, because that…_that_ _albino bunny is with him all the damn time._"

The redhead's eyes widened at that. Of course, why didn't he think of that? Mello always hated Near. And lately the fights Mello had with Kinship had been more of habit than serious rivalry, was only because Mello couldn't stand the sight of Near.

And the way the blond spoke, it was as if he was suddenly aware that he was helpless. He didn't have any form of entertainment, no one to actually talk to. Well, of course there was Matt, but they both knew that the gamer was not the most fun individual to talk with. Unless of course they were to talk about video games, but Mello had no interest in them.

"How about this, if there's no one else who would fight back, then we can start planning how to separate Kinship and Near." Matt offered, knowing that if he didn't present a good distraction the blond would end up doing something stupid. Again.

For a moment Mello considered the option. Then he nodded as he took another loud bite of his chocolate. Relieved, Matt let out a mental sigh as he went back to his tinkering with his baby.

The third subtle change was slower. Over the course of the next few weeks, of Kin's time to prepare and impress the new guest, Near was spending less time with his roommate. Now that Mello seemed to be leaving them alone, there was no threat of bullying.

Although just to be safe both the pale boy and teen agreed that they slowly go about their own ways. They heard that Mello was scouting for victims that filled in the gap of entertainment Kin had given. So just in case the blond didn't find any replacements Kin and Near didn't completely cut each other off.

However, the other children began to notice the change. And they also noticed that Mello didn't seem to know the changes that were beginning to take shape between Kinship and Near. And to four individuals, it was a chance that was too tempting to pass up.

And thus, on the very same day the new guest was scheduled to arrive, the strange event occurred.

=3=

Light woke up early, mainly from his excitement of the chance that he knew he would take later on today. He had already practiced in his head what he was going to say, and how he would impress the guest that was coming.

But as he woke up, he felt that something would be different. There was just the smallest scent of copper that hung in the air. With a quick glance around Light realized that there was no blood in the room. And no Near for that matter, either.

The teen furrowed his eyebrows. Usually the paler boy would be asleep in the middle of his tower of toys or curled up in a tight ball on his bed. Reluctantly Light pushed his worry out of his mind and headed for the shower.

When he came out half an hour later, clean and still a little damp, Near was still nowhere in sight. Still pushing his worries aside the teen began to change into proper clothes that he had planned to wear today for the special occasion.

Maybe he was building a tower or an army of toys in the study room. But as he thought of this, the scent of copper grew stronger. Light opened his eyes, his body tensing.

Something was wrong. Light didn't know how he knew, he just knew. Something had happened to his roommate. Quickly the teen put his shoes and jacket on, and began his search for Near.

Light first checked the kitchen and library, as their room was close to both. There was no sign of the pale boy. Still worried the teen went around to the study rooms. When he peeked into the fourth one, Light was starting to panic.

The teen bolted towards the last study room, not caring of the 'No Running' rule. As he rounded a corner Light ran straight into Mello and Matt. The pair yelled in surprise as they fell hard on the floor in a mess. The teen silently cursed as he opened his eyes to see that they were a tangle limbs.

"What the hell, Kinship! That freaking hurt!" Mello was the first to complain.

"Someone's elbow is digging into my ribs." Matt said as he tried to squirm his way out of the human pile.

"Oh, sorry Matt." Light lifted his arm to allow the gamer enough room to get up.

When the teen was distracted, Mello took his chance and grabbed for the outstretched arm. Light tried to yank his arm back but it was too late. The blond crawled on top of the teen's back and trapped both arms by the wrists as if Kin was being arrested.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't bash your head into the floor." Mello hissed.

Light squirmed in his hold in an attempt to free one of his wrists. The blond had a tight grip, and it didn't look like Matt would be able to reason with the blond.

"I don't have time for this! I have to find Near, so let me go!" The teen yelled in frustration.

Surprise filled the air. Mello and Matt glanced at each other. They had actually been looking for the pale boy without success. And if Light wasn't with Near then something happened.

"We've just searched in that area you were running towards. There's no sign of Near." Matt informed.

Light tensed as his mind processed what he'd been told. If Mello couldn't find his roommate, then something was definitely wrong. The blond was an expert of finding and locating Near.

"Get off of me, Mello! I have to find him, I have to find Near. Let me go this instant!"

The blond tilted his head at the odd behavior of his rival. Kinship had never shown so much fright before. Usually the teen was calm and collected. About the only time he'd betray any emotion was when they fought.

"Mells let him go already." Matt said.

With a scowl Mello reluctantly released his rival's arms and crawled off. The teen quickly scrambled onto his feet with a frown. It was clear that Kin was not happy of the turn of events. Matt decided to put their heads together, otherwise there'll be another fight between his roommate and Kin.

"Ok, so Near is missing. We already checked that half of the orphanage, where have you searched Kinship?" The gamer motioned to the area he and his roommate had just come from.

Light frowned. "All of the first floor, and some if not all of the area I've just come from."

"That only leaves one location. The grounds outside the building." Mello peered outside of a nearby window.

If possible Light seemed more agitated from the news. There was no reason as to why Near would go outside. If anything he avoided leaving the main building as much as possible. And today there are clouds outside with the heavy smell of rain to come. No, there was no chance of Near wandering about on Whammy's somewhat spacious property.

But there wasn't really much of a choice when Near was nowhere inside the orphanage. By now the scent of copper was less subtle and more noticeable, and Light could hear just the faintest of screams from within the recesses of his subconscious. The last time he smelt or heard such horrors were many years passed, when B made his first and last move on him.

Light couldn't brush off his fears anymore as he ran down the stairs, barely registering the footsteps of Mello and Matt following close behind. Although Light found Near to be odd, too antisocial, and sometimes annoying, he had grown to accommodate with the albino boy's strangeness and actually considered him as a younger brother.

The three of them burst outside with tremendous speed, almost tripping over their own feet along the way. The three of them examined their surroundings. For an orphanage, Whammy's had a large amount of land. And they make use of the land with a good sized greenhouse and a garden. Both of them were taken care of by the children, of course supervised by an adult or two.

On the other side of the greenhouse was a shed, to store the tools needed for gardening.

"You two, search the greenhouse. I'll check the shed." Light sprinted his way across the grass without waiting for a response.

He heard Mello yell obscenities behind him, but the teen paid no mind to the words. Light only focused on his task, as he opened the shed to find it empty other than shovels and other various tools to garden with. The teen backed out, eyes quickly scanning the area around him.

Panic was taking full hold of his body. The scent of blood hit Light full force, just as the clouds above released the pent up rain, falling hard and fast. As he stood before the shed, the teen's clothes were soaked within seconds. Light didn't care, as his eyes suddenly focused on the bomb shelter that had once been a basement.

It had been a normal basement that was permanently closed off, and during World War II Roger transformed it into a shelter to survive the bombings. Once the threat of the war was over, the shelter was once again locked and never opened again. But there had been whispers, whispers that the key to open the door from the outside into the shelter that Roger had kept hidden, disappeared.

"Oi, Kinship! He's not in the greenhouse!" Mello informed loudly.

The screams became louder in his ears, and Light reached for a shovel and ran toward the bomb shelter with lightning speed. The pair followed the teen despite the heavy rain, panic also settling in them as they realized where Kinship was heading towards.

"Near? Near! Are you in there? Can you hear me? Near!" Light pounded against the wooden bomb shelter door.

Despite the screams reaching a higher pitch and instead of fresh rain he could only smell blood, Light was still able to hear a faint shout from within. He couldn't make out any words that were spoken, but he was still able to recognize Near's voice.

"Near, step back! I'm going to tear through this! Mello, Matt, go get tools to help me open this." Light instructed firmly as he began attacking the doors with the shovel.

Within minutes the three boys tore through the wooden doors, not caring about splinters in their fingers or the fact they were soaked to the bone from the rain. Light nearly fell down the stairs on the way down, for it was dark and in his blind panic he didn't bother to be safe. The teen found Near curled up at the bottom of the stairs, cold and frightened.

"K – Kin…" The boy stuttered as Light took off his suit to wrap around Near in an attempt to comfort him, despite it being wet and cold.

"I'm here, you shouldn't talk. We're taking you to my room." Light assured his roommate as he gathered Near up into his arms while going back up the stairs.

=3=

Some thirty minutes later Light had Near changed into a new pair of clean pajamas, some bandages and band aids around his fingers from clawing at the wooden doors, as well as wrapped in several blankets while Matt was making hot cocoa in the kitchen. Mello for the most part just sat on the teen's bed, being rather quiet. Light didn't bother the blond, as he focused more on the bundle cuddling close to him.

Light was slightly bothered that his wet clothes were damping Near's bed, but as long as the three blankets protected him Near should be all right. Speaking of, the boy was still shivering even when hugged by warm blankets and cuddling close to Light for extra warmth. The teen grew concerned about the shivering. But on a lighter note Near's shivering wasn't as bad compared to when they first brought him inside.

The door opened to Matt with a tray of four cups of hot cocoa. The redhead offered the tray first to Near and Light, who the teen politely accepted with a curt nod. Mello didn't bother waiting for his offer and simply reached for the nearest cup. Matt felt the urge to scold his roommate, but just this once he'll let it slide. They were guests in a room of Mello's rivals, after all.

"So, Near, what happened? Or is it too early to ask such a question?" Matt, surprisingly, was the first to inquire about how Near ended up in the bomb shelter underneath the orphanage.

The small boy blinked, hesitating for only a moment.

"Four bullies whom I do not recognize. I believe they are the newest edition to Whammy's, and if my hunch is correct I am their first victim. They've braved upon this act of stupidity because they no longer feared Mello. With him out of action, I suppose they thought it'd be all right to have their own fun." Near whispered, twirling a strand of his hair.

"It was an opportunity they thought they could get away with. How long were you in there?" Light wanted to hunt down the four individuals and punish them. But he had to remain calm, for he was needed here right now.

"Since late last night, I believe."

"Would you be able to identify them when presented a photograph?" Matt questioned, preparing for the numerous amount of questions they will have to answer to Roger.

"I can try. But if I cannot identify them by photographs I can at least figure them out through their voices." Near nodded.

"Good. We'll try and work this over with Roger tomorrow. He's probably asleep now." Light said.

"Do you really think he'll listen to us, though? I mean, he normally ignores whatever it is I have to say." Mello spoke calmly for once.

"He'll listen if it's all of us. Especially if it concerns Near, since he's one of the potentials. We have enough evidence, with his injured fingers and the fact he can remember their voices." Light assured them.

After the conversation ended silence was welcomed in the room, for the boys didn't know what to say right now. They weren't exactly all friends, but one couldn't say they were enemies either. Three of them worked together to help the fourth, so maybe they were acquintances. They drank their hot cocoas at their own pace, Mello finishing his within three minutes flat. Matt was the second to finish, as he set his and Mello's cup back on the tray. Near drank his slowly, as if savoring the warmth it provided into his stomach.

At some point when Light took a sip and nearly flinched at the cold substance. Careful not to make a face, the teen set his cup to join the other three, unfinished. It wasn't that he didn't like the hot cocoa, but he had spent most of the time of silence calming his senses.

The smell of copper still hung in the air, although very faint due to the chocolate drinks. His ears were still ringing from the screams, but they too, grew faint and very distant. To distract his mind Light thought of L. He thought of how the detective was doing, and whether or not he remembered him or not. He wondered if L held onto the stuffed panda he had given when he left what felt like an eternity ago.

Light was beginning to miss L, and to distract himself he paused in his ponderings by glancing over at the clock. He then realized it was now twelve fifteen at night. It was past curfew for the boys, and Light didn't feel up to all the drama of them being caught. How did the time pass so quickly? With a sigh, the teen turned to the two guests.

"It's late, you guys can stay if you want."

The pair nodded, evident they were tired. With some help the three pushed their beds together. The beds were too small for two people, but put them close together and they can hold up to four people, if a little squashed. And thus Light somehow ended up in the middle with Near cuddling to his right, and Mello and Matt huddled to his left.

Just as he was falling asleep, Light realized that he had forgotten completely about the meeting that Roger had scheduled earlier.

=3=

Death: There you go. I needed this chapter to be long in order to set up the next chapter, in which some very interesting events shall take place. And although I don't want to spoil the surprise, but it will take a while for me to update again, and since it is almose Christmas, L will make an appearance again in the next chapter. I won't reveal how or why though xD

Meanwhile, I hope this doesn't seem rushed. I finished this around one in the morning, and have been working on it for some time. And I just really wanted this chapter to be done so I can work on the next one, for it'll shift the plot on where I want it to go.

So, without further ado, please click the lovely review button. Happy Holidays!~


	7. Flowers For a Ghost

Death: Happy New Year! Well, it's actually New Year's Eve, but still. I thought I'd update this just before it's 2012 where I live. Actually it's not until the next eight hours or so, but still, I'm updating! Just thought it'd be a nice gift.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Title: _Flowers For a Ghost_ by Thriving Ivory. The song is often mistaken and titled as "Only Human" thanks to YouTube (which I don't own btw).

**Chapter 7** – Flowers For a Ghost

=3=

All actions come with consequences. And all consequences come with some form of punishment or another. This is what L understood, and to him it was one of the most important lessons Whammy's could offer to their children. L knew this lesson, and he understood it.

However, L found it unfortunate that one of his potentials will have to learn it the hard way. From what Roger had told him, Kinship didn't show up for the meeting. Roger didn't bother looking for the boy, and he insisted about severely punishing him for making a fool of himself. L refused to take that action, for reasons Roger could not understand.

He knew that Kinship was intelligent, and they had given him an offer that he could not pass up. It was evident that Kin will fight all the way if he had to, in order to avoid the path of becoming L's back up. L didn't want that to happen. After the challenge with B he couldn't allow another child to follow that path. All it would lead was destruction, just as B nearly succeeded.

So there must be a reason why Kin didn't show up. He had requested Roger to go and find him to ask what happened, but the old man wouldn't budge. L didn't pressure him further. Roger was not a man who would be made a fool, let alone by a troublesome child.

But L wouldn't believe Roger's accusations, at least not yet. He had to hear both sides of the story, and he knew that Kin would never pass this opportunity up. It was the only chance that they will provide him so he can escape the path of being L's first choice in a successor. He provided something that would change Kin for the better.

Kin was not a fool. He would never pass up on the one and only opportunity that was given. So maybe some incident that Roger was not yet aware of that held Kin up. But what? For all of his intelligence, L couldn't quite reach the answer that was hidden from him. For all he knew, Kin could be sick or injured, if the fights with Mello had truly become violent.

No, the latter couldn't be it. Injury, sick or not, Kin would find some way to meet with the man L had chosen to be the teen's mentor. The cause of Kinship's inability to come by to the meeting was something else, something critical.

That bit of information L couldn't obtain, for when Roger reported that Kin was ill with the flu the day after he supposedly defied them with excuses about his roommate, L was left to wonder. Roger was a reasonable man, and with a kind heart he always listened to what the children had to tell him. But in Kin's case he was different. It could be that Roger has had enough of Kin's behavior, and thus his patience was wearing thin.

Which was understandable, when for the past year Kin's high sense of pride and unafraid of the consequences of skipping his classes came forth. Not to mention the fights between Kin and Mello, to this day L still had no idea why those two would clash and fight over the simplest of things. So Roger had every right to be harsh with Kin.

But now L had another obstacle as to this complicated puzzle. Why, and more importantly how, did Kin become sick? For all the years he was at Whammy's, he was as healthy as a horse. He never got sick and had no need of flu shots. Although on that part it was Kin's outright refusal, to which they finally conceded when Kin made his point by destroying one of the needles and made an attempt of attacking the poor nurse.

Yes, he is quite violent, L thought. And although of his and Roger's careful planning of setting up Kin's classes to grow up and avoid such acts of violence. Apparently their plans have failed, and quite miserably at that. L had miscalculated how deep Kin's pride ran through him. Perhaps that had something to do with his upbringing, long before he was brought into Whammy's.

Thus far L was not close to figuring out Kinship's true name, but since the little challenge has begun he was a little better off than when he began. L has learned through subtle hints from Watari that Kin was a child of a chief detective who was on his way of earning trust with the Watari figure whenever there was a case from Japan L happened to be working on.

L had yet to conduct research on past investigations in Japan, for he had been distracted by the Los Angeles BB Murder Case, and among other matters such as pondering what was going on at Whammy's.

It has been about a week after Kin's Defying Act, as Roger liked to call the incident, and he's been receiving rather odd reports. Kin was still sick, and gradually getting worse. Near was given clearance from his classes to stay and help his roommate since Kin refused having the "creepy nurse" watch over him.

Aside from Kin's illness, Mello had become more violent than ever. This, L at first guessed was a reaction to have no one else who gave him a challenge now that Kin was sick, but that guess was soon crossed out. At one strange incident, a group of boys tried to lock Near in the bathroom when Mello happened to walk by and violently attacked the four boys responsible.

This attack was more violent than any of the fights the blond child had with Kinship. One boy had a black eye, and a concussion from Mello beating his head into a pulp. Another boy had a broken arm and missing a tooth, the other two had broken noses with large and very deep bruises over their chests and stomachs where Mello kicked them. There were a few things that bothered L about this attack.

One, Mello wasn't provoked. L had asked the blond straight out through the laptop, who responded that he attacked them as soon as he turned the corner and saw what they were doing. This was completely different than the fights the blond had with Kin, for they would start with words of insult and the tension would build until one of them took the first punch. At this incident Mello attacked them from behind and didn't even give them a warning.

And the blond wasn't the least bit sorry. Not even L could convince Mello to apologize, let alone figure out just why he attacked the four boys. For whatever reason he remained quiet, and Near wasn't much help. The boy L had been particularly fond of after Kin, Near avoided the laptop by caring for his roommate.

L didn't press the matter. If the boy didn't want to answer questions, then once he did meet the laptop he wouldn't speak a word. It'd simply be a waste of time on both of their parts.

Another thing that bothered L, was the fact that Mello rescued – _rescued_ – his rival, Near, from the boys. This was a complete 180 turn that was certainly not expected. Since the beginning Near was the target of Mello's bullying. First it was because he simply didn't like the pale boy, but once it was learned Near was above Mello in the list of potentials, his anger towards him escalated.

Thirdly, all of this couldn't be coincidental. Whatever prevented Kin from his meeting, Mello and Near may have been a part of it. What event that could draw them closer together, even more bizarre Mello, L did not know. If L could guess, it centered on either Matt or Near, seeing as how they were fond to either of them. But L didn't really think that given any circumstances Kin would stop and help Matt. So, no, maybe it was Near.

Now that he thought about it, it did make sense. Near was Mello's rival, a rival he hated, and maybe he had been searching for the pale boy in means to bully him. If the blond and his roommate met Kin, who was going around to check on his pale roommate, then the three of them could have worked together to find Near.

The probability of such an event, however, was about forty six percent. No, it was more forty eight percent. Either way the probability was low. But it was a better circumstance than anything else L could think of, which were in the less than ten percent range.

Just as L figured the most probable conclusion, his computer startled him out of his thoughts with a beep. Upon looking at the screen, L blinked.

On the very white screen, was one instant message.

'_Um…I suppose I can't exactly call you what you're known to us. Now please, hear me out. This is a kid from Whammy's.'_

A child was contacting him from the orphanage? How in the world did this child manage it? Unless this prodigy was good with computers, and not to mention good hacking skills in order to pass all of the firewalls L had set up. The detective leaned closer to the microphone.

"Yes, it would be wise not to address me in that fashion, seeing as how you infiltrated my computer. What is it that you need?"

There was a pause on the other end. Maybe the child was surprised about his behavior? Normally L would scold anyone who attempts to hack into his computer, but his gut told him that this was an emergency. In the back of his mind L was cross referencing all the children he could think of that had the capability to hack into his personal computer without setting off alarms.

'_You have to come back. Kinship needs your help. He's delusional from his fever, and as much as Near tries to help him I don't think he'll pull out of it.'_

L frowned at the information. For the past few days Roger didn't give him anything abnormal about Kin's illness other than it was becoming worse. Also, this child that contacting him would have to be someone who was close enough to Kin and Near, for all L guessed Near was the most probable to know about his friendship with the teen.

"Why ask me in particular? I am no doctor, isn't there a doctor checking up on Kin–kun too?"

'_Of course, there's the doctor, but he's no miracle worker. Kinship won't eat or sleep, he keeps rambling on about smelling blood and hearing screams. Just recently he tried to attack us, and if it weren't for Mells he would've harmed someone. Also, you need to hear the entire story behind Kinship unable to come to the meeting.'_

This worried L. It was one thing that Kin was suffering from the flu and gradually worsening, but it was another if he was delusional and the horrors from past trauma were haunting him. L was beginning to worry about the teen's sanity.

And he also figured out the identity as to who hacked into his personal computer. No one else would dare give Mello a nickname.

"I am aware that I have not all of the information needed about this incident, however, why can't you tell me here and now?"

'_I'm pressed on time. I'm risking myself from getting caught for staying too long.'_

Understandable, L thought. To use a computer without permission, as well as sneaking around at night, and hacking into L's personal computer, would have major consequences.

"All right, I'll be there as fast as I can."

'_Oh, one more thing.'_

"Yes, Matt?"

'_What? How'd you…? Oh, never mind. Anyway, what I wanted to ask, actually it's more of a favor. Could you maybe come here by the 28__th__?'_

L hesitated, thinking over what the date today was. The 28th would be the day after tomorrow. That's quite too soon to pack up everything that's needed on an important case and make it to the orphanage in England in time.

"Any reason why that particular date?" He asked more out of curiosity.

'_The 28__th__ is Kinship's birthday. He was rambling how his birthday was the 28__th__, and that it'd be as boring and unappreciated as the previous years he's been here. I thought it'd be a nice birthday present.'_

At the last bit the detective smiled. Although Matt was a tad socially awkward, he had a sense of kindness that was rather surprising for a child. It was even more shocking when the gamer was very close to Mello.

"It'll be a bit stressful, but I'll do my best to arrive in the morning of his birthday. Oh, and Matt? Thank you, for going through all of this trouble."

'_Anytime.'_

And with that, L contacted Watari to begin preparations for a flight that will help them arrive at the orphanage by Kin's birthday.

=3=

Near was at his wit's end. He's been losing more sleep, although he has chronic insomnia, he still manages throughout the day with at least four to five hours of sleep every other day with short naps along the way. But for the past few days the pale boy has been unable to recuperate the few hours he could sleep.

Kin's soft rumblings would sometimes escalate to shouts, and often switching languages from English, Japanese, French, a few curses in German here and there. At one point the teen switched to all four languages in one sentence, which further confused the very sleep deprived Near.

Matt and Mello would try and help, but the blond didn't know what to do and Matt could only cook and serve food that Kinship would barely touch. And about the only thing the pale boy could do was gently run his small hand through his roommate's hair, which seemed to be the only effective method to calm him down.

And thus, another reason why Near had been losing sleep. It didn't help matters that the boy was rather bored, and he couldn't stay on the floor for very long with his toys. So Near decided to adapt by using Kin's chest and stomach as a battle field with army toys. Thus far he has completed the lines of the soldiers in red, and was now finishing the soldiers in blue.

How he had gotten this far in lining up his soldiers, Near still didn't know. He kept one hand twirling a lock or two of Kin's hair in replacement of his own hair, and the other worked on his toy soldiers. Each placement of each soldier was careful, so as they won't tumble down each time Kin took a breath or as he mumbles about random ideas.

For the most part since Near began to work with his toys, Kin had retreated into a calmer state. At this point in time while he was almost done with the blue soldiers Kin's eyes started fluttering, as fatigue finally caught up to him. The teen was worse off compared to Near about the need for sleep, as the fever and his delusions never allowed even a few minutes of shut eye.

Apparently he wasn't done talking, though, when Kin started rambling again. His voice sounded hoarse, and incredibly sleepy enough that he spoke so softly Near had to hunch his back a little more to hear.

"I can't remember if I ever told you, but I don't really like this place. But you and Mello made it more bearable here, and sometimes I wish you two could meet L in person as I had. He's probably too paranoid to come here after the BB case, so I can't really promise he will come."

Near blinked, surprised. He knew of the first part of Kin despising the orphanage, but not the rest. The pale boy guessed that his roommate missed L, even cursing him out of frustration that he hadn't visited in so long. But as soon as his venting had passed Kin was back to missing the detective once more.

And maybe, just maybe, Kin was starting to accept Mello as a friend. The blond would come by to check on them at least once a day now, but his visits were short due to his inability to interact properly and his detention for attacking four boys required his attention. Roger had punished Mello by giving him janitor duty, cleaning the kitchen, library, and all of the bathrooms in the building. And the old man took away the entire stock of Mello's chocolate, which didn't help.

"You're really fond of L, Kin." Near stated, returning his attention to his toy soldiers.

"Of course, he was my first friend." Kin smiled fondly. "And he made me realize that coming here wouldn't be so bad. Although it could be boring at times, you guys made this place more fun. And I've come to think of you as a little brother."

Again the pale boy paused. Normally Near was not one to be caught by surprise, and yet Kin had managed to do just that not only once but twice. Near studied the teen's face, and saw the honey brown eyes seemed to shine like gold. He seemed to be telling the very truth.

But Near was not yet ready to call him big brother. And maybe once Kin was over his illness he won't remember anything. So the pale boy decided to change the subject.

"What are you most afraid of? And why do you hear the screams and smell blood?"

Kin frowned, not expecting such a question. In truth L had briefly breached the subject, but never dove further for more information when he clammed up and refused to look L in the eye.

"I only hear it when I or someone I'm fond of are in danger. I always thought it was because of the first bit, but on that day when I woke up I could hear the screams and smell the blood, although very faint and distant. But both grew more intense as I searched for you. They stayed with me well throughout that day, even after we found you." Kin stared off into space. His eyes no longer held the golden shine and the honey dulled into a dark brown.

"Does it happen often?" Near knew that he was treading on thin ice, but if there was any chance to ask it was now when Kin was in this state.

"Sometimes it comes and goes, it happened a lot the first time I came here. But now it's almost rare, and I'm not too bothered by any of it." The teen nearly shrugged, sending a few soldiers to tumble down into an early death.

"Oops. Sorry."

Near sighed. "I can always start over, anyway. At least it was only the blue soldiers and not the red ones."

"You like red?" Kin tilted his head up at his roommate awkwardly.

"No, red is the color of the hatred, blood, violence, vengeance. The red soldiers are the evil ones in this battle. Blue is calming, and at times can be deadly. And I like to think that blue signifies justice."

"Personally, I like red. Sometimes to do justice you have no choice but to get your hands dirty."

"You've been smelling blood for far too long, Kin." Near remarked with a small grin.

"Did you just joke? Who are you and what have you done to my roommate?" Kin frowned.

"I didn't go anywhere, Kin. You're the one losing it from your fever." The pale boy shot back.

"I blame the rain. And my stupidity for sleeping in wet clothes instead of dry pajamas."

"He admits that he was stupid? All right, now who are you and what did you do with my roommate?"

"I don't know, I didn't go anywhere, and yet I'm the one who got sick." Kin grinned.

Near rolled his eyes as he went back to lining up the blue soldiers that had fallen earlier. But now, thinking back, he was supposed to have a serious conversation with his roommate.

"So I'm guessing you had some sort of psychological and emotional trauma from your past that causes you to hear screams and smell blood. Does Roger know about this at all?" Now that he thought it over Near was worried whether or not anyone else knew and why Kin didn't reach out to anyone for help.

"I don't even think Butler Man knows, despite him being there when I had my break down from being chased by B. I briefly mentioned it to L, but he didn't press further on the matter. I don't really care about it anymore. I'm over the horrors that caused it." Kin replied.

"Butler Man?"

"My nickname to Watari."

Near picked up a random soldier, and asked, "If you're over the horrors you saw before you came here, then why are you still hear and smell those same horrors?"

For once since his ramblings started, Kin remained silent. Either he was too tired or he didn't know the answer at all. Near suspected it was the latter, for Kin was now wide awake.

The pale boy continued with his toy soldiers, silent and as determined to finish setting everything up for the epic battle that was to come. As silence filled the room once more, Kin's eyes began to flutter, now more tired than before. Within five minutes the teen was almost fast asleep, unaware of the toy soldiers in battle on his stomach.

Just before his eyes closed, Kin spoke again for the last time.

"What I'm most afraid of…is that no one will ever whisper my name in a friendly and loving way. Somehow B knew my name. He knew my name just by looking at me. And since then I guarded my real name with fear. Although it's for my own safety, it still hurts, that no one knows not of it, and I will never hear my name in a loving voice again."

For the third time that night, Near was caught off guard. He didn't know what to do about this information, or how to comfort his distraught roommate. At the time all the pale boy could do was gently twirl with Kin's hair or running his tiny fingers through it in a soothing way.

=3=

It was about six fifteen in the morning when L and Watari arrived at the front gate of the orphanage. The morning was rather cold, and the pair was bundled up in their coats and scarves and, in Watari's case, his favorite traveling hat. As of yet only Watari could guess as to why the sudden and unexpected trip here was for, and he believed the main cause would be Kin.

It had been rather stressful packing everything up, but somehow they managed when L actually helped. When their flight came in the airport, Watari had called Roger's office with a brief talk that they were visiting. Roger had been surprised, for usually they gave him a twenty four hour moment's notice.

And now here they are, walking into the orphanage. Watari was the first to walk in, L close at his heels. The young man held the panda bear he had cherished for all these years close to his body, eyes scanning for any of the early risers among the children here.

"I'll head for the kitchen to check on the sweets." L stated, for he wasn't able to eat too much of the sweets available on the airplane.

"Don't eat all of it, as I understand most of those sweets belong to Mello." Was Watari's only response as he headed towards the shared bedrooms reserved only for them.

L simply nodded as he continued on his way. Just before he reached the door he heard a rather loud sneeze, followed by what sounded like a curse. Without thinking the young man entered the kitchen, panda in one arm, a suitcase in the other, and without confirming exactly who was in there.

At his entrance two heads immediately turned towards him. Both pairs of eyes widened at the sight of him, and L briefly wondered if he actually looked as horrible as the jacket he wore. He stared blankly back, recognizing these two as Mello and Matt.

The blond was the first to recover as he tilted his head, studying the unknown figure with interest.

"…Are you L? No, wait, you _are_ L. I don't recognize your face, and you appear to be too old to be here." Mello chomped on what looked like toast with peanut butter and melted chocolate all over it.

L pouted, feeling rather insulted. "For your information I'm twenty one. I am inclined to say that I am not _that_ old."

"So I was right, you are L. You never denied it, which means I hit the jackpot. And, really? You're twenty one? You know you're at a drinking age for America, right?" The blond grinned.

"Why are you talking about alcohol at this age, Mello? You're not sneaking around Roger's stash, are you?" L lowered his voice into a serious, quiet tone.

"No, of course not. I only search for whatever chocolate he's hiding." To prove his point, Mello took another bite of his strangely chocolate and peanut butter toast.

"He's telling the truth. I follow him around just to make sure he doesn't make trouble." Matt quickly added.

At this L finally backed off on the matter. He made his way to the cupboard for his own search for sweets.

"You should be grateful, Mello, that you have a loyal friend who is willing to follow you to the ends of the earth and back." L said, as he grabbed a muffin and put it in his mouth so his free hand could continue to grab other sweets.

"So, why are you here? Is it to see us in person, or to check on Kin?" Mello inquired.

With a muffin in his mouth, L had to let it drop to the counter in order to reply while his hand continued on its mission for sweets.

"A little of both, for I was summoned here by Matt. I was told that I could hear the entire story as to how all this trouble started."

"…You want the whole story?"

"Yes, preferably. I'd like to know why Kin–kun didn't show up at the meeting and why you seem closer to Kin–kun as well as Near. For last I checked, you wanted nothing to do with him."

"I still want nothing to do with him, but he's mine to bully and no one else's." The blond retorted.

"I think it'll be best for you to sit down, L. This story is rather complicated with many misunderstandings." Matt motioned for the empty chair across from him.

"Oh, please call me Ryuzaki. It's too dangerous for that name to be mentioned while I'm here."

"Right, Ryuzaki." Matt corrected himself.

As the boys explained what happened, L sat in his chair listening intently. He didn't interrupt them as they talked, only eating his sweets and wiping crumbs off the panda bear's head from his eating.

When they finished explaining, silence filled the kitchen. L began to bite his thumb in thought. All of the pieces of this puzzle were coming together, and now everything was starting to make sense. It explained Kin's illness, and Mello's drastic behavior. The reason why none of this was explained earlier was because Roger refused to listen to their excuses, and Near was excused from his classes to care for Kin. The pale boy still had bandages over his fingers from that day, and since he was never seen outside his shared room no one else but Mello and Matt knew about his injured hands.

If only things didn't turn out this way, L thought gravely. He feared that they may have just lost the trust from Kinship. He was not one to sit around and not allow such a blow to his pride for not being given another chance when he had done a good deed. It was at that moment that L felt a tad grateful that Kin got sick. The idea of him suffering in a bad flu made L feel guilty, but since the teen had been sick he had been unable to retaliate against them.

And with that in mind L stood up from his chair, ready to brave Kin's room.

"Thank you once more, Matt. If you had waited until after he was better, then I'm afraid we would have another B on our hands. " The young man stated as he passed the boys.

The pair didn't bother following him. But Mello had a strange sense that finally someone wanted to listen to what he had to say. He felt that the weight on his shoulders has been lifted. Meanwhile Matt had a feeling of dread of L's choice of words.

The detective gently and silently opened door as best he could, peeking inside. A soft smile crept upon his lips at the sight before him. Kin was fast asleep, and how he's grown the past years, L noted. The teen was starting to grow too big for the bed, for he barely gave enough room for his roommate.

Near lay curled with his head near the older boy's stomach and his legs used the rest of the spacious pillow Kin was using. One of the pale boy's arms was outstretched over Kin's stomach, holding onto what looked like a blue toy soldier. L realized that Near must have started playing with his toys with the teen as the platform, for red and blue soldiers were scattered over the bed. Some were even on the floor.

Carefully L made his way towards the bed, stepping lightly so as not to disturb them. The detective set the panda bear to lean against the bedside lamp. With a smile at his success, L pulled out a small envelope that had been stuffed into his pocket. He then set it between the panda's paws, the envelope reading "Happy Birthday".

Feeling rather proud of his handiwork, L turned and left the boys to rest a little more. And for the first time in many years, L felt giddy and excited. He couldn't wait until Kin woke up to see the panda on the nightstand next to him.

'_I imagine he'll be delighted. He deserves something that will brighten up his spirits after all he's been through.'_

=3=

Death: Well, I did say L would make an appearance. I just didn't say that he would meet Kin, er... Light, did I? And yes, the beginning of chapter has opened up with a change compared to all of the previous ones. For one I couldn't think of what lesson or thought Kin...*cough* Light, would have that's related to the chapter itself. So I just thought that maybe instead of Light this time, it'd be L. It was a nice change of pace.

1) Near's Toy Soldiers: I was kinda making fun of the Death Note anime. Remember how Light/Kira would be red, and L would be blue when they have the intense stare or when they have each other cornered? I can't remember if Near was blue or not, but I think he was, so I was kinda making a small referance to that through his toy soldiers and Light choosing the red ones over the blue, etc. I thought that it's about time I make at least some referance to the anime/manga, whichever worked best for this chapter.

2) Mello's Toast: That was something I made up on the spot. I have no idea if that kind of toast is edible. Now I've had toast with peanut butter with slices of bananas, that was good. But I don't know if peanut butter with melted chocolate is good on toast or not. I imagine it would, after all peanut butter works well with chocolate, and peanut butter is also good friends with toast. The only thing that worries me is the chocolate part with toast. Would anyone care to try and tell me how it is? Cuz I'd love to try it myself, but I don't think my mom would approve such a thing for breakfast...

I think that wraps just about everything here. So please, leave a review by clicking the lovely button below. Reviews are my inspiration to keep going.


	8. Comatose

Death: Yes, I'm sorry for the long wait. Some personal drama, school, and the loss of my baby (my cat), have done nothing in my already stressed life. Also, I have also introduced a new story...I may regret this later. But, I will do my best with updating everything I can.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The song _Comatose_ is by Skillet. Finally,_ finally_ I have used a song from Skillet. Expect more, for to me their songs suit well with Death Note in my opinion.

**Chapter 8** – Comatose

=3=

Many would say nobody can ever live a wonderful life without love. Loving someone, and thus being loved equally in return. At such words Light could only laugh. Some would assume that he was a sociopath if anyone could read his thoughts on the matter of love.

He understood the concept, and he wasn't completely heartless. He did love his parents and sister, after all. But Light considered such emotions as an impossible feat for someone other than his family. People were disposable, and thus, relationships were too. These views of romance first took place when his parents' met a violent and sudden end that left his heart cold and bitter. Separation from his sister didn't help matters, either.

Although L helped speed up the recovery process and Mu's persistence to help keep the boy in line, Light still felt cold about the thought of love. Despite him being more open and interactive in the orphanage, Light held everyone within an arm's length (Mu being the only exception). He didn't become emotionally involved with anyone, for the scar of his parents' death left him weary and perhaps a little paranoid.

The orphanage is an innocent, somewhat happy atmosphere. Underneath that mask anyone can betray and stab you in the back down the road. Beyond Birthday is a perfect example of this. Yes, he was rude and maybe a little crazy towards other children (in Light's eyes, B was completely insane long before he left), but it was clear he was fond of Whammy's. The proof was simply through his actions.

If B wanted to, he could've leaked information about Whammy's actual goal and the whole world would come running to destroy or take over the orphanage by force. This act of monstrosity would've certainly harmed L the most, emotionally wise. And yet B didn't do a thing either because he was fond of the place, or he was focusing too much on destroying L that harming Whammy's didn't cross his mind, it was hard to speculate.

Of course if he did have some affection towards Whammy's, Light could relate to a certain degree. Although he didn't like it here in the orphanage, over the years he had grown to appreciate how this place offered every child equally and without the stress that accompanies regular schools. Well, for the most part anyway (him being appointed as L's first choice without his consent or knowledge set his trust in them back a few notches).

And as the place was finally starting to grow on Light, he noticed some small changes. Nothing too drastic, but enough or him to notice perhaps he's not entirely cold and bitter anymore. As time flew by Light was more accepting of the idea of thinking of Near as a little brother, for whether he liked it or not the pale boy grew on him.

At most times he found Near annoying. The boy was blunt and not afraid to express his thoughts when confronted with someone he truly held respect for. Light happened to be one of the few who gained both Near's trust and respect. He saw firsthand the quiet boy was never to be underestimated despite his appearance and attitude. And although Light despised the toys (he couldn't say how many times he injured toes or stepped on them on his way to the bathroom), he knew there was no effective method to change Near, for the toys were like a safety blanket for him.

All in all, Light didn't think after Mu had left he'd ever see anyone else as a brother. Although they were important enough to be considered as brothers, his thoughts and interactions between the two were different. Mu was the responsible affectionate older brother keeping him in line, while Near was the younger brother who needed his protection.

And through the change of interactions and actions, Light began to wonder if his thoughts of romance were perhaps a little off. Light has started to think maybe he should reconsider love, and if he was presented the chance of experimenting with relationships he might take it. However, there was one small challenge that prevented him from giving anymore exploration of this.

Light wasn't quite sure what his interests into other people were. He didn't know if he even preferred women, men, or both. However, as a perfectionist Light has quite an eye for beautiful things. Although beauty was one thing, personality is an entirely different matter altogether. From his distaste for the bratty children, Light could at least say he didn't go for the clingy or hyper type.

This was all he could narrow down. Light had spent many nights (when he wasn't studying), deep in thought on what he would prefer in someone he could call his partner. Despite all his various angles of looking at different people, Light couldn't get any more specific on his required tastes in another person.

So, Light began to question what he liked in other categories. Did he like cute things? A little, he did have a soft spot (not that he'd admit it out loud) for stuffed animals, preferably cute plushies. Did he like sweets? Perhaps on a special occasion like holidays, but never more than that. Light had a taste for spices. Even so, Light had begun to tolerate sweetness thanks to Mello, and the bitter dark chocolate was gradually become a favorite of his.

Did he enjoy sports? Not for a career, but Light did have an interest in tennis and martial arts. Did he like politics? Not entirely. Light remained up to date, but more for the study of psychology to better understand the minds of people. Politicians are overly sensitive and rather easy study subjects for him. What of religion? Light had an interest in what could be out there, but his mind being too logical, there weren't any he could grasp and remain loyal to.

And most important, what did he think of justice? Light believed that the justice system was not entirely perfect, but there was a reason why L was around in the first place. Through his vigilante status, as L said himself some years before, the justice system (or systems) was more efficient to society. So, as long as L or his successors were around, then justice would be just fine in his opinion.

Basically, he was a tad loose about the ideas of the justice systems. However, that didn't mean his ideals he learned and valued from his father was still there. He couldn't really push those aside when his admiration for Soichiro were the stepping stones of his life.

So with all of these qualities he liked within himself, maybe he would meet someone who has the same interests as him. As long as he kept these interests within mind, Light would perhaps meet that someone someday.

But Light wasn't completely sure if he would ever experience true love. For, what is love based on lies on his identity? He would never reveal his true name, or else he would end up in a casket six feet under. Even sadder no one would show up for his funeral and leave him flowers. His true name would never be known, or held ever held dearly in anyone's heart.

Light didn't know which was worse. Not having anyone whispers his name lovingly, or it wouldn't be held dear to someone in their heart when the time for him to leave this world comes.

=3=

He felt warm, his limbs heavy, body and mind seemed content to just lie in this warmth. And yet something was nagging in the back of his mind that he shouldn't miss this day. With great reluctance, Light stirred from his slumber. His eyes fluttered open, and then closed as the sun beat down onto him through the windows.

Opening them once more, Light began to have a better feel of his surroundings. The first thing he noticed was the source of the warmth was not just the sun, but a small body curled up to his side. Blindly reaching over Light recognized the soft curls of his roommate, lying with his head against his side and tiny feet currently taking residence on the other side of his pillow.

This knowledge brought a smile to his face. An odd position to fall asleep, but he didn't object. Light slowly sat up, finding his body covered in dry sweat and his hair in disarray. He felt disgusting, and a much needed shower was in order.

Being careful not to disturb Near, for the pale boy appeared even more tired than usual, Light swung his legs over the side of the bed. Just when he was about to stand, he paused when something else caught his attention. From the corner of his eye he noticed something white and black on the bedside table. One glance over he nearly did a double take.

There, sitting upright with a small envelope with a card being held by what could be the very same panda bear he had given to L so many years ago. In utter amazement Light reached over to the stuffed animal with one hand, the other went for the envelope.

Upon further examination the teen realized that this was, in fact, the very same panda. From the pink tongue sticking out, to the red scarf decorating its neck, it was indeed the stuffed animal that he kept as a keepsake of his family, and then handed over to L nearly a month after he was brought here.

This last thought made him frown in thought. Did this mean L was here? Or was this sent over by mail? No, it couldn't be by mail otherwise it'd be inside a box, not sitting on the bedside table.

Gently setting the panda down Light turned the envelope over and pulled out a card. To his surprise it was a birthday card. This further confused him, why would a birthday present be sent now? His birthday wasn't until the twenty–eighth. Opening it up, Light began to read.

_Happy Birthday._

_I have heard you haven't been feeling appreciated on your birthday the past years since your stay. So I thought maybe perhaps I should start making it up to you? When you're ready, you know where to find me._

_Oh, and would you please bring the boys along with you? There's something I have to tell all four of you._

_P.S. Thank you for what you've done for N. I knew you had a good heart. _

_- Ryuzaki._

Light blinked several times. For one, the card wasn't typed at all. If L was to give an order or anything at all, he would type it by email or paper. This was handwritten, and in the most perfect handwriting he had ever seen. Light had to read the content of the card about two more times in order to fully comprehend the words.

He found it a little surprising that L wanted to make up for his boring birthdays. What puzzled him was exactly how the detective knew about his birthday, for never once did the teen complain about it. And the fact L was here, actually _here_ and wanting to see him and the other three brought a bright smile on his face.

And L was actually thanking him for his good deed. Light was finally being appreciated for what he did.

When the meaning of the message registered in his head, Light almost jumped up with a scream. But he remembered he had a roommate, one who was still sleeping in fact. So instead the teen smiled widely, carefully setting the panda on the bed and the card on the bedside table and made his way to the bathroom.

'_He's back. He's really back!'_ For whatever reason he could not fathom Light felt giddy all over his body.

=3=

Near awoke to the sound of running water from the shower. Lazily sitting up the boy yawned. By the looks of the light outside, he had slept in. Couldn't be bothered, for he had very little sleep the past week. And with the shower running, it would be good to assume that the fever had broken and the elder teen was feeling much better. Kin had been bedridden during the entire time he was ill, and not completely in the right mind to even move either.

The pale boy tilted his head when his eyes set on an unfamiliar object on the bed. A panda plushie lay there, on the spot where Kin had fallen asleep. Out of curiosity and his interest in toys of any kind, Near pulled the stuffed animal into his lap for a better examination.

The plushie was incredibly soft to the touch, and the pink tongue protruding from its mouth brought a rare and small smile from the boy. Near didn't know which was cuter, the red scarf or the pink tongue that gave the round fluffy face a more childish expression.

It dawned on him then that the plushie wasn't here the night before, or anytime at all. So, when did it arrive here? And exactly who put it here? It couldn't have been Mello, that blond was rude and went about with so much noise Near would've woken up when the panda was placed into the shared bedroom.

Matt was also out of the question, for wherever the gamer went Mello merely followed. Plus Matt didn't have any taste for toys such as this, his love for video games were so great Near could relate, for he too loved games. But the games he was best at were puzzles, not virtual ones.

However, now remembering what day it was, Near realized that the panda was supposed to represent. Today was his roommate's birthday. Well that solved why there was a random panda in their room.

Near examined their surroundings, and found a birthday card sitting on top of the bedside table. He didn't get a chance to read it, though. For just when he was contemplating whether or not to reach for the birthday card his roommate exited the bathroom.

"Hey, you're awake." Kin said as he used one of the towels to dry his hair.

"And you're doing well, after a whole week of fever induced trauma. You've been completely out of it the entire time." Near replied not so sympathetically to his roommate.

"Wait…what? It's been an entire week? Are you serious?" The teen blinked several times at the pale boy.

"Do I look like I'm the type to joke? Your fever had been so bad I had to remain cooped up with you in this room until you were healthy again. And I have to say, it was pretty traumatizing. You kept babbling on about some pretty dark stuff." Near said, and then adding indifferently. "Oh, and happy birthday. I suppose this is your present from someone?"

The pale boy reluctantly held up the panda. Yes, Near had a dozen or so robots, toy soldiers, action figures, but he had never owned stuffed animals. In an orphanage such toys didn't last very long, for the younger children always fought over them and more often than not the very object they were fighting over was torn to pieces. Near didn't bother requesting a stuffed animal for Christmas or any other special occasion, in fear Mello would destroy the unfortunate toy. But this panda was just so cute.

He must resist the cuteness.

As if sensing the boy's internal distress, Kin raised an eyebrow.

"Why, are you jealous?" The teen laughed at the deep frown of his roommate.

"Oh, relax, will you? If you want, you can have it. But! You have to promise to take real good care of it, all right? It's something special." Kin smiled – yes, smiled – and not one of those fake smiles, either.

Near briefly wondered if the fever had reversed his roommate's behavior. Then again, there was the talk of his greatest fears and how he thought of the pale boy as his little brother, so Near didn't know exactly what to think of the complete one eighty of his roommate.

Oh, what the heck. Near was being given his first stuffed animal.

"Well, if you insist then thank you." The younger boy held the panda closer to his chest.

"You're welcome. And by the way, once I'm done changing we need to go find Mello and Matt. I was planning of keeping it a surprise, but I guess it's all right to say it. L is here and he's requesting I bring the three of you to his room."

At the last bit of information Near blinked, eyes widening even more if it were possible. Just the night before the elder teen had been going on how he wished for the potentials to meet L in person, and now it was coming true? What a birthday this had turned out to be.

Then the words sank in. L was going to see them. L was going to see them! The L, the one and only world detective! Near was very well about to get off the bed and do a little victory dance. But due to his ego (yes, even a quiet boy genius such as him has pride issues), and among other reasons only he would know, Near simply stood up and patiently waited for his roommate to finish changing.

Near could hardly contain his excitement.

Just as Kin had finished buttoning his shirt their door opened. Startled, both boys turned to see Mello and Matt strolling in rather rudely. Well, the blond was being rude, which no one could really expect less from him. Matt just happened to be on his tail playing with his Nintendo DS.

"Hey! Looks like you're all well, again. Good! Guess what happened to us just an hour ago?" Mello grinned widely.

"Hey, have you ever been told you need to knock on the door before entering someone else's bedroom? If you happened to come in a few minutes before, I'd be in nothing but a towel." The eldest boy scowled.

"Oh? That would've been one sexy sight." The blond snickered.

"You know, the one thing I wished on this day, was that you learn some manners. Oh well, I guess having Ryuzaki back will make up for that. I have been waiting for what, five, maybe six years? Now that you two are here, let's go already!" Kinship grabbed his roommate's wrist and walked on past the other two on the way out.

"Hey, wait! How'd you know about Ryuzaki?" Mello yelled, quickly following them. Matt more or less sighed as he folded his portable game before sprinting after the others.

"It's supposedly my birthday, remember? I got a present from him!" Kin answered as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

"For your information, it is your birthday! You just happened to be a week behind thanks to that damn fever of yours, Kin!" The blond shouted back.

"Uh, Kin…" The smallest boy was struggling to keep up the pace without tripping over his pajama bottoms.

"Oh, oops, sorry Near." The teen slowed down considerably for his roommate but still lead the way.

"Hey, is it just me, or is Kin acting differently?" Mello leaned over to whisper in his friend's ear.

"It could be just an after effect from the fever." Matt whispered back.

"What are you guys whispering about?" Kin glanced over his shoulder.

"Nothing!" Both boys piped at the same time.

"Nothing what?" A different voice spoke.

All four boys stopped where they were in the hallway. They stared in surprise at the thin man before them, shoulders hunched and just about to leave the room.

Kin was the most surprised of the four. It had been about six years since he's last seen the detective. L had grown. His limbs were longer and he was now the height of an average man. Or at least he would be, if his hunched shoulders and back didn't hinder his height.

His hair was much of the same. Wild and stood in random directions. Now that he was older, L's hair seemed thicker than it was when they first met. And for some reason, Light had the strange urge to run his hands through the dark mass of wild hair.

Ignoring this random impulse, the teen lowered his gaze to L's eyes. Light felt a swell of pride in his chest that he was right about Near's eyes being nothing at all like L's. His pale roommate had grey eyes, and when under a certain light they would appear to be a near black. But L's eyes, they were so dark they could only be black. They weren't soulless or blank, if no one knew what to look for that is. No, these eyes drew Light in like a bug to a lamp.

When they didn't answer, Ryuzaki pressed again.

"Well, am I going to get an answer?" The elder man tilted his head.

"We…we weren't talking about anything!" Mello quickly turned to his roommate. "Isn't that right, Matt?"

"What he said."

Ryuzaki sent them a hard stare, unbelieving a word they said.

"I find this hard to believe, and I have to say that you may try to fool me once, but do it again and there will be repercussions. Kin–kun had learned this, didn't you? Although, I did let you off easy, since you happened to be recovering from a nervous breakdown." Ryuzaki grinned at the scowl he roused from the teen.

"You know, for what started as a good birthday, you kinda just ruined it." Kin deadpanned.

"Did I? Well I have been told that I'm horrible at socializing, I was hoping I'd be better at it by the time I met you again. Guess I still need some work, done." L frowned at the conclusion.

"Anyway, you wanted all four of us here, didn't you? So what's this all about?" Light decided to be kind and change the subject for them.

"Oh, yes. Please, follow me into my humble room. I am sorry to say it will be a bit crowded, but there should be enough space to accommodate all of us. I wanted to give an extra surprise for Kin–kun, but what I propose will also be given to the rest of you as well. Please make yourselves at home." L led the way in and sat in a chair, knees up to his chest.

For old memories sake, Light sat on a corner of the big bed. Out of nervousness, Near crawled to the front end of the bed, a little behind his roommate. L, who had begun eating his tower of sugar cubes, paused upon seeing the pale boy cuddling with the panda bear to his chest.

'_This is surprising. Kin–kun must have grown a bigger heart since last time. But at fifteen now, he's bound to believe that it's a matter of keeping up a good appearance and gave it to Near. Or perhaps he gave it to him for the same reason he gave the panda to me, by a means of comfort? It would certainly explain his attachment to the plushie.'_ L brushed the pondering theories to the side as the other two boys settled down in chairs next to the bed.

"So, what'd ya wanna talk to us about?" Mello stared at the detective with a tilt of his head and snatching his hidden chocolate from his pocket.

Despite his rudeness, L answered anyway.

"First, I apologize for all of this unnecessary drama that all four of you have endured. I am especially sorry for you, Kin–kun, when you've done a good deed and was otherwise punished. I know, by coming here, I can at least try to amend what you've been through. And for this reason, I am removing you as my first choice as my heir."

Light blinked, surprise clearly shown through. He had clearly did not expect any of this.

"However, you are still being given this chance to come with me and the three boys as part of their training. As I have yet to come to a decision between Near and Mello, I would be willing to grant them hands on training. And with Matt around we would get a lot more work done. He is excellent in computers, and very well with hacking. We could use his talents, and in turn he is trained along with Near and Mello." L spoke right to the point.

"So, what am I supposed to be doing then?" Light furrowed his eyebrows.

"You'll be helping me train them, of course. I know you're four to five years older than them, but you have so much potential you'd be able to reason with them more than I would. Also, you boys knew each other more than I do, so in a way you're the bridge between the boys and I as we adjust to this new life."

The teen frowned slightly at the idea. He did not want to sit around and teach these boys. He wouldn't mind doing anything for Near, and Matt would be all right. The problem was Mello.

"All right, so I'll be the over stressed mother of this whole family, then what's in it for me?" Light crossed his arms.

L blinked as he tilted his head. "I thought it'd be obvious, even to you Kin–kun."

The teen only raised an eyebrow in question.

"Freedom. You'll be granted to be free of this place. And not only that, but you and I will be able to spend more time together and catch up over lost time. I know you've never truly accepted this place as your home. And I admit, it has taken me this long to come to terms with such knowledge."

Light's heart literally skipped a few beats at the words. This strange act of kindness from the world's greatest detective was everything that he needed to hear. These words were like a breath of fresh air that his body and mind had been deprived of for many years. It was as if he had finally been given the chance to live, to really live.

And with a smile graced from the heavens, Light agreed.

"Very well, I'll accept this gift of yours. Why wouldn't I? You're my friend, and I've been waiting for six years you bastard. I simply wanted you to say exactly what I needed to hear. And on that note, your apology is accepted. However, you still owe me for making me wait."

'_When have I been so possessive of him? It's only been six years. But, I did miss him. And he did make me wait. So…why do I feel like I sound like some love struck girl? Wait…'_

Light began to compare the qualities he kept note of for any potential interests to L. Did this man like cute things? It would seem so, he accepted the panda without question or out of pity. And now that he thought about it, he did say L reminded him of a panda. Panda's were cute, so didn't that technically mean L was cute too?

Did L like sweets? Insanely so. He lived on nothing _but_ sweets. In fact, the man was eating raw sugar cubes right now! Light moved on to the next quality. Did L like sports? That was hard to tell, the man was so thin. Perhaps there should be further study for this answer.

Light knew L had some interest in politics. He had to, for as L, he'd be playing the strings with the politicians as his puppets if he wanted to. As men were corrupted and easily fell into temptation, Light wouldn't be surprised that many politicians were the culprits of heinous crimes such as theft and abusing their power to the fullest.

The teen didn't really need to cover the justice quality. He used the basics of L's own justice for one of his own, with the addition of his father's thought process of justice. Although it was a strange mix, Light wasn't all too bothered with the way L handled cases or how picky he was when files were presented to him.

All in all, L fit the qualities Light liked within himself. But that didn't mean he, dare he say, _love _L right? No, that couldn't be right. Yet, why did he feel a pang in his chest at that thought? He shouldn't be feeling this way. Or perhaps he was simply in denial about all of this?

'_Forget it. This is neither the time nor place to ponder such ideas. First I have to conduct further study about all of this. Right now, I'll just pretend I didn't just think of all of this.'_

If possible, the pain in his chest intensified, if only a little bit. Light quickly pushed his feelings aside.

L smiled in return. "I'm glad our friendship has remained all these years. And for the rest of you, what do you say?"

"I accept." Near tightened the hold on the panda to his chest as he raised his spare hand.

"Ryuzaki, I've been itching to get outta this hellhole for the past two years. Now I won't be so bored anymore with so many challenges. Perhaps I don't have to bully Near or pick a fight with Kin anymore, but who knows? I'm not making any promises, though." Mello snickered as he took a bite of his chocolate.

"Not that I'd expect you to make any promises anyway. What about you, Matt?"

The redhead tilted his head, considering for a few moments. Matt then shrugged without care.

"Sure, it'd be boring without Mello around. I need my source of entertainment, too you know."

"Good, we've all come down to an agreement. We'll move out starting the day after tomorrow. Meanwhile, I've brought cake since today is Kin–kun's birthday." L spoke with enthusiasm.

'_Day after tomorrow? How'd he know I would agree?'_ Then the answer hit Light like a slap in the face.

It's because this man was L, as simple as that.

=3=

Death: Finally! Some love is in the air! Or at least the very beginning. This is all based on my own love for someone, which I shall keep hidden from the special someone. Anyway, I wanted to portray that when in love, denial comes first. Even for a boy genius.

1) Hopefully I get this in time before the date changes, but this was supposed to be finished for Light's birthday. So, happy birthday Kira!

Please click the lovely review button~!


	9. Alumina

Death: Excuse me for the wait for you guys. Had some trouble finishing this chapter, but I'm happy how it turned out. I also had trouble figuring out what song to use for the title of this chapter. I first wanted to call it with this song, but then I started looking around for something else. When I got tired of searching, I used my iPod to choose for me. And, well, I guess Alumina was going to be the title no matter what xD

Disclaimer: It's what I've been trying to say for the past eight chapters. I own nothing.

The song _Alumina_ by Nightmare. Yes, it is the ending of Death Note Season 1.

**Chapter 9** – Alumina

=3=

Since his acceptance into Whammy's House, Light had felt as if he were in chains. Figuratively speaking, of course, since he had the option of wandering the orphanage's property and enjoy what little warmth the sun had to offer. Really, it was colder here than it was in Japan. As to why he felt he was in chains, well, it could be that he wasn't allowed to venture outside of the gates.

Yes, the property was big enough for a good sized garden, and a greenhouse to top it off, but that was it. At some point there had been a second building here on the property, which used to be a church. But due to a fire, whether it was by accident or intentional Light didn't know, the church was no longer there. He guessed the matters around the burning of the church was leaning more on intentional, if no one bothered to inform him of the cause.

Anyway, the real problem Light had with the orphanage was that he couldn't get rid of the feeling he was being trapped. Having a garden around was good and all, but after a certain amount of time it became rather boring. Light wanted to explore the town they were in, since he was given only two chances to see Winchester.

The first chance was when he had been escorted by Watari to the orphanage. Although half the time he was sleeping, he did manage to catch a few glimpses. With those few glimpses of the surrounding area, all Light could think it was completely different from the bustling streets of Tokyo. It made him curious enough that he wanted to give this new place a chance when he arrived.

The second chance was when he had finally been given an opportunity to leave the property without sneaking. Roger offers everyone a chance to go and experience church on sundays. No one is forced to go if they don't want to. After all, the orphanage takes in children from around the world with different religions and cultures.

At the time Light was given the chance, he had been itching to get out and explore. He grew up in one of the busiest cities of Japan, Light was too used to walking about in society than being cooped up in a small amount of space. All of these rules were taken seriously by Roger and the rest of the staff was just too foreign to him. In Japan, he could walk around without worry of being abducted. In fact, in given time he could have taken the bus and subway all by himself.

But he wasn't in Japan, but in England now. Some changes were hard for him to adjust to, besides his disinterest to interact with others. The second time Light had been given a chance to see Winchester he didn't have a great opportunity to take in the surrounding areas. Roger didn't allow the children a chance to stop and stare as they walked along. And once they were sitting in the church, Light thought, maybe he could get used to the idea of only coming here just for an excuse to leave the orphanage.

Then the priest spoke.

Being the critical thinker that he was, everything went downhill from there. He was eight, he couldn't hold back the snickers, the glares, or the increasing urge to throw something at the priest. Preferably he wanted to throw one of the bibles that were meant for children at the strange man. When the priest had enough of being patient, he paused and _politely_ inquired what was wrong with him.

Thinking he didn't need to lie (he _was_ in a church, after all), Light proceeded on explaining and questioning the flaws of the Holy Bible and anything else related to church. Flabbergasted, the priest couldn't reply as the boy continued on speaking. No one else could raise a finger at the boy, for they were too shocked or embarrassed to intervene.

But when Light started about Heaven and Hell, everyone couldn't hold back the gasps or the harsh whispers. He wasn't bothered at all, though. Light continued to pester the baffled priest. Finally having enough, and probably regained enough composure to put a stop to this, Roger stood up. With a gentle hand on Light's shoulder, he apologized to everyone for the interruption. Roger then requested one of the staff members escort Light back to the orphanage.

Light had been scolded heavily on his actions from just about everyone. And from that day on he was prohibited from leaving the grounds, never to be invited to the church again. Not that he cared, anyway. He could never fully grasp the idea of religion. His over analyzed mind wouldn't allow him to take the leap of faith. But his actions cut off the only chance he could meet society.

He hated himself over it. Why couldn't he keep his mouth shut, just for once? Light knew, though, that it wouldn't work out anyway. It was better to speak than to snap and throw the children's bible at the priest. Speaking wasn't considered assault, at least back then which was what he believed anyway.

The only chance he could ever see cities was to graduate and become a letter. By being assigned a letter, he'd be one of L's direct subordinates. Therefore Light would be given the chances to work on cases and explore the world. He'd been cooped up for so long he didn't care where he went, so long as Light could just become part of society, any society. It didn't matter too much to him, he just wanted out.

This was one of the reasons why he gave his best at the orphanage. He spent countless hours in the library studying nearly five chapters ahead than the rest of the class. Light had been that determined. Even if he couldn't become a letter, there was still the forensic art department he had grown an increasing interest in. He thought that maybe, if was really good at this, then L would consider him to help on some cases.

Light had planned on nearly everything on what he wanted to do with his life.

And then his longtime roommate had moved, with L's second choice as his heir taking Mu's place. With Near came the news of Light named as L's first choice. Everything had come crashing down, the ground crumbling under his feet. This wasn't what he wanted. L was a treasured friend, to know he'd be taking his place if something happens – such as L _dying_ for example – Light couldn't live with that.

So he simply rebelled. Certainly he could've done something better than not showing up for classes, but it was the only effective method he could think of that would most likely lead to not so drastic matters. One of which, the worst case scenario was that L would be forced to break away from his work to visit only because Roger couldn't handle the situation. If it came down to that, it would've been the first time L would put his foot down on one of the children of the orphanage.

Light would've been the laughing stock. It was only a matter of pride that he managed the straight face as he continued to do whatever he wanted while still maintaining perfect scores. Besides, so long as he showed up on important tests and pass them with straight A's, then he saw no real problem

The plan took a year to take full effect, but he finally had a result. Light was removed as L's first choice. Even better he was given a chance of freedom and be part of L's team as they solve cases around the world. This turned out to be a not so bad birthday after all.

'_Freedom. You'll be granted to be free of this place.'_

Yes, finally the suffocating cage that imprisoned Light had finally been opened. Light now had hope for achieving his original goals, before all of this unnecessary drama happened. He could now leave this boring orphanage and see the world he so wished to explore. If anything, Light secretly wished to eventually come to Japan, his home. He had been granted to be free and sometime in the future he can go home.

Freedom. The very word echoed in his head, with L's soft spoken voice. The word – no, the way L had simply _spoken_ it – left little tingles up and down his spine. The feeling wasn't annoying, but Light couldn't really appreciate the strange sensations either. The tingling was like how a foot would be when it fell asleep, only it didn't leave his back numb or tense. Also, Light didn't know of a case where someone had suffered from their back falling asleep like a foot would.

In fewer words, Light didn't know why this was happening. He could analyze all the facts, but the answer eluded his sharp mind. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't reach the conclusion. Light's inability to come to one was what really irritated him to no end.

He was perfect, he always found the answer. Light had considered all the angles of how to find the answer he sought, and he still didn't understand why. Light Yagami, Kinship, was supposed to be the perfect image of a fifteen – no_, _the perfect_ human_ on earth – he shouldn't be held up because of some simple issue of a tingling feeling in his back.

Light blamed everything on his musings over whether or not there might be something between him and L. Ever since he doubted such thoughts was when it all went downhill for him.

Wait a minute…

Could this be the conclusion Light had sought after?

Well, Light did agree with himself that he was willing to study further on the requirements of L, or anyone for that matter, as a potential relationship. But, if he did reach his answer from this study, what then? If L did indeed reach these requirements, then what sort of relationship will happen, if L accepted him at all?

Will it be a romantic one, as seen in all of the stories and movies, or will it be a 'friends with benefits' thing? For some reason, the latter part left a pang in his chest that Light could not explain. This can't be right.

Light was torn. He wanted to follow his logic, and put everything aside and believe there was nothing going on. And yet his intuition, which had brought him luck thus far, told him otherwise. Which was he supposed to follow? For the second time in his entire life, Light was truly and utterly lost.

As the prideful young man he was, he desperately wanted to believe all of this was nonsense.

An image of L smiling fondly at him entered his mind.

'_I'm glad our friendship has remained all these years.'_

So then…

… Why did his heart flutter at those words? Why couldn't he erase that particular smile out of his head?

_Why_…?

=3=

His birthday wasn't jotted down as his happiest, but it was definitely the most memorable. And if he were to compare, it would've been close to what was the happiest birthday with his parents when he had been four years old with cute animals as the theme. The only reason his fifteenth couldn't go beyond the four year old level was, well, to simply put…

Mello.

Granted, Light had witnessed Mello at his worst of behaviors. But the moment he set eyes on the cake L had chosen for Light, the blond nearly ravished half it. Then the Mello proceeded to be rude and insult the teen at every chance he could. For the most part Light didn't give into the temptation of punching Mello in the face. He simply allowed himself to take a deep breath, and continued whatever conversation he had with L or Near.

Well, that was until Mello went too far.

Light was doing his best with conversing with L when it happened.

"Kin, you're a coward."

Mello started laughing. Light _hated_ being laughed at. On top of that, the blond had just insulted him. The air thickened with such intensity everyone residing within the room knew what was going to happen.

Before L had the chance to stop the teen, Light had already flung across the room towards the blond. Mello shrieked, having realized too late he was under attack. He didn't even have enough time to defend himself when the punch landed square in the jaw.

Mello fell to the floor with a pained groan. Light was about to land another punch when thin arms suddenly wrapped around his waist and pulled him away. Thinking the arms belonged to Matt the teen struggled against the other and elbowed the other's stomach.

He heard a pained grunt, but the arms around his waist didn't loosen. Frustrated the teen half turned to face his captor. Honey brown eyes widened when he met obsidian black. Light's heart skipped a few beats, even speeding up in a wild rhapsody of horror. Whether he was frightened because he happened to be in L's lap and held tight against the detective's chest, or because he had just assaulted the man, Light didn't have the time to ponder which was the reason why.

The teen only knew one thing, which was he's frightened from being held like this. What was worse was that he could feel blood rushing to his cheeks. Since when did he ever become flustered? Light was supposed to have the best poker face in the orphanage!

With that in mind, the teen began to struggle again.

"Let me go, Ryuzaki!"

"Your heart is beating too fast. Are you sure you are all right, Kin–kun?" L tightened his hold while settling his chin on top of the teen's shoulder.

Light nearly shuddered at how close their faces were. If he hadn't been struggling, he most likely would have.

"I said let me go!"

"Not until Kin – kun calms down."

Light almost cursed aloud. The teen angrily pouted and settled with glaring daggers at the blond. Mello cringed a little from the intense hatred showing through those eyes. Boy, if looks could kill, the blond would surely be dead by now.

'_But the way Kin reacted when L held him, one would think he's got something for L.'_ The blond thought. Maybe he should ask Matt later. He would most likely know.

"Matt, would you be so kind as to escort Mello out of the room? I believe he still has some cleaning to do around the orphanage. He will need to finish cleaning by the time we're leaving the day after tomorrow." L spoke as if Mello wasn't even in the room.

"But…!" The blond was too flabbergasted to come up with an excuse to defend himself.

The teen snorted. It took every ounce of his control not to laugh at Mello's expense.

"Now would be most preferable, if you would please."

Matt simply nodded. He knelt by Mello and helped his roommate up to his feet.

"C'mon Mells, it's about time we're supposed to leave anyway."

Amazingly Mello only complied without a complaint. He didn't even look back with a glare of his own as h followed Matt out. When the pair left did L finally unwound his arms around the teen's waist. Light quickly scooted away and stood up.

"Let's go, Near." The teen held out his hand to the pale boy.

Blinking in surprise, Near accepted the outstretched hand anyway.

As they were about to leave a hand caught Light's wrist. Surprised, the teen sent a questioning gaze at the detective. L simply stared back with a blank expression.

"Kin?" Near questioned.

"I apologize, Near, but I'm going to need to borrow your roommate for a few minutes." Funny, he didn't sound sympathetic.

The pale boy didn't buy Ryuzaki's tone. Near felt the uncertainty rise as he turned to gaze up at Kin.

Light sent his roommate a reassuring smile. No one else would believe it, but he could tell the pale boy was worried enough for his emotions to show through his mask.

"Don't worry, Near. I'll be there in a few minutes to help you pack."

Reluctantly the pale boy silently nodded. He eyed Ryuzaki for a few seconds, and he turned around and left. When the door closed L released the captive wrist.

Light raised an eyebrow in question.

'_This better not be about my attack on Mello. I've held onto my anger for as long as I could.'_

"You may sit, if you'd like. There are a few things I wish to talk to you without the boys here." L answered as if the teen had actually spoken and took his seat where he was before he broke up the fight.

This sounded serious, so maybe he should sit down. Light adjusted one of the chairs so he could face L from across the table and sat. For a brief moment he realized the table was the very same one he and L played chess on. Light almost smiled at the memory, but the serious expression on the detective's face ruined the moment.

"So…what did you want to talk to me about?"

"For starters I suppose I should say that I am shocked at how much you've grown. You even dared to use profanity against me, Kin–kun. Then again, you are fifteen. There was a seventy–three percent chance of your behavior taking a drastic change from when you were eight." L stated, his expression serious, but his eyes gave away the fact he was simply curious.

Really, after all this time, Light could still have enough understanding to know how to read his friend's emotions. In many ways L hasn't changed too much in the past few years.

"Ryuzaki, you have my respect. I trust you. There's no harm in calling you names when you've left me waiting for so long, right? Surely even you would understand you deserved that one. And you have Mello to thank for my vocabulary. That boy can curse like a sailor if he's really riled up." Light simply shrugged.

"Yes, I completely understand. However, I wonder why did you not want to be my first choice? I trust you, Kin–kun, most and foremost than the other two. I'm not going back on what I said earlier, you're no longer my first choice. But, as L – no, _as your friend_ – I have the right to know why."

The teen tensed. Obsidian eyes stared unblinking at the teen. L the detective was staring him down, not his friend. Light was too shocked at the words to fully understand that L wasn't angry at him. Yet, as soon as he made eye contact with those eyes, the urge to reply as an angry teenager shrank and died down. L was not asking out of spite, he was asking out of trust.

So many years apart from each other, Light had nearly forgotten L's abnormal way of wording things. Well, he had accused the detective for being weird, didn't he? He almost laughed as the memory replayed in his head.

Light relaxed his shoulders, a charming smile made itself known on his handsome face.

"I thought it'd be obvious, even to you Ryuzaki–san."

L cocked his head to the side, perplexed that his own words were turned against him. But he waited for the teen to continue. Kinship wasn't angry, which he found curious.

"I already came to my own conclusion of what I wanted to do with my life. I suppose it wasn't made quite clear, since no one bothered to simply _ask me_. What I wanted had nothing to do with becoming your heir. I am honored that you would consider me, but honestly, I wouldn't be the best choice, let alone your first choice." Light leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Oh? And why is that, Kinship? Please, continue. I am curious as to why you say this." L blinked in surprise.

"Well, for one, you're my friend. To know that I'll be taking your place if something happens to you while I know you personally is not something that will settle well in my head. That is the reason why I don't want to be your heir."

"So, as your friend, you don't feel comfortable taking over the title of L. I had suspected as such, so then why do you say you're not the best choice then?" Kin did explain why he didn't want to be his heir.

Light diverted his gaze, breaking eye contact from L for the first time since this conversation started. The teen shifted in his seat, growing more nervous as he carefully thought over how to word his answer. Also, in admitting he most likely has mental issues, would not only harm his friendship with L, but hurt his pride too. At the moment he didn't know which would hurt the most, yet he was leaning more towards the consequences of their friendship.

"I…I'm too stubborn. If any criminal were to challenge me, if I was L, I'll take it too personally. You saw what happened when Mello called me a coward. I won't be able to handle any cases without allowing my emotions to get in the way. It might work in a normal society as an average detective, but to hold the title of L, such behavior can't be accepted. Also…"

L stared as the teen paused in mid sentence. Whatever reasons Kinship had, they were affecting him. But, to L, this seemed more as if Kin was admitting something. By simply saying, "I'm too stubborn", was a nicer way of confessing, "I have pride issues". For Kin to be admitting such a thing meant he was taking a leap of faith in his trust in L.

Throughout the six years, Roger had given him updates of Kinship's behavior, social status, grades, and growing interests. It had been noted Kin had a large amount of pride, but it couldn't be proven the extent of his pride went until he rebelled against them for being chosen as first choice. The reason why L didn't allow Roger to take any actions was because he thought the teen wanted attention. If by simply ignoring him, the teen will eventually grow bored and drop the whole rebellious stage.

Yet, the teen never gave in. Kin had proven he could be patient, never surrendering when he was determined to allow his plans to be drawn out for as long as it was needed until either Roger or L snapped. If anything, this only encouraged L to choose him as his first choice among three. But was he serious? Or was he setting up some sort of game to test them?

This was why L gave the condition of giving Kin the chance to be taken off the list of choices. He needed to see if the teen was completely serious with objecting the idea of L's heir. But then, when the arranged meeting was to happen, Kinship didn't show up. Roger had lost patience and ignored L's requests of hearing Kin's side of the story.

Everything went downhill from there. If it weren't for Matt contacting him before Kin recovered from his fever, he would've been lost to them. L had said so himself that Kinship had the power of being a great help to L, but he also had the power of becoming L's greatest opponent if he so chooses.

After the Los Angeles BB Murder Case, there was great reason why L took immediate action. Although he opposed the idea of giving into Kin's demands, he saw no other method that would prevent the teen from walking down the very same path B had chosen. It was only through luck, and swift action from Naomi Misora, that L had barely won the war. What would happen if he were forced to face his best friend in the ultimate war? If it were to happen, the war wouldn't stop until one of them were to die.

The answer was obvious. L wouldn't throw away the only chance he had to prevent such a war from happening. Even the world's greatest detective needed a friend by his side, rather than put his work before his social life (if interacting through the use of a computer to the children was considered as one). It was a choice L felt he made the right one, which was a breakthrough in his understanding the values of friendship.

Look at what happened to B.

"Also…?" L gently inquired, hoping he could at least get a little more out of Kin.

Light bit his lip, suddenly losing confidence. It wasn't that the teen couldn't trust L, but now wasn't the time. They've just been reunited! Maybe he should wait a bit, when the timing was a little more perfect. And perhaps after Light could settle on whether he truly had feelings for this man or not.

Once more something in his chest clenched. The teen bitterly hoped this wouldn't happen every time he pondered over sorting out his confusing emotions. It was starting to become annoying.

Decision made, Light stood up. The action surprised L, who had been staring intently at Kin, frowned as he watched the teen but made no indication for him to sit back down.

"Never mind, I can't say anything right now. Maybe sometime later, when I'm ready to tell, all right?"

L didn't know what was going on, therefore couldn't come up with anything to say. And before the detective knew it, the teen was making his way towards the door. For some reason that L couldn't fathom, his heartbeat quickened.

"Wait, Kin–kun."

He wasn't intending to reach out for the other's wrist. But his arm had moved on its own accord. The teen stopped where he was, and nervously half turned to the elder man.

"Yes, Ryuzaki?"

Light didn't mean to sound nervous. But the worried expression in L's eyes gave away that he had failed. L's expression hardened as he spoke.

"You said _maybe_. Kin–kun, you know I mean no ill intent towards you. You know this, right?"

Light refused to flinch. Those words didn't hurt.

"I know you're socially inept, Ryuzaki. But I know you mean well."

_Liar._ L had seen that coming. But he wasn't going to reprimand the teen for lying, he'll give him the slip this one time. What was it Kin was so afraid of? Why couldn't he tell him?

"Then when you're ready, please tell me what it is that's been bothering you. This may sound cheesy, but it's the truth. You're my friend, and friends are there for each other. I won't judge you, nor would I demand you give me answers now. I know you need space, but at the same time don't leave me hanging. I will worry for you but I won't ask questions. You mean that much to me, Kin–kun."

Light was at a loss for words. He had expected L to be angry at him, not supportive. Not that he was complaining, no not at all, the teen was grateful for the support. It was just a shock to receive any of it from the detective. Light visibly and mentally relaxed, as he smiled fondly.

"Thank you, Ryuzaki."

"Anytime, Kin–kun."

Light's smile widened.

"And, for the record, that was pretty cheesy."

L pouted. The teen couldn't help but giggle. At the detective's confused expression Light started laughing.

Feeling relieved, L joined in. In the back of their minds, this moment was similar to the last time they met several years before when L was leaving. Light had just enough time to give L the panda, as well as saying goodbye. They had shared a moment of laughter, as if to lighten up the mood for the both of them.

Now they were having that moment once again. Only this time, they were not going to be separated.

Light was sure of it.

=3=

Death: All righty, some foreshadowing, a little bit of teasing, a teensy bit of action, and some laughs (not to mention the pouting L is BACK!). Next chapter is when the plot really gets rolling. So expect the next chapter to be really, really, really long. With lots of action, suspense, lots of humor, oh, and maybe a kiss?

Yes, yes I am teasing you right now. And I'm laughing at your face. I can't help it when I'm being evil.

There **_is_** a reason why I'm Kira. Mind you, I'm not psychotic, but I can pull him off with ease. Oh! And please look up Tainted Love Cosplay on either facebook or DeviantART. The President, Gore-Font, first created the group on DA. Now that we have more members, Madame President has created a fan page on facebook. I'm the VP in the group! Which, personally, is not something to brag about, really. Gore-Font is the amazing president.

So, without further ado, please leave a comment and tell me what you think!


	10. Sound of Madness

Death: I deeply apologize for the long wait. My summer has been the busiest it has ever been in many years, probably more than a decade. But! The plot has finally made itself known, and it is time to shock everyone to the point you all will literally fall out of your chairs! And, if I am successful enough, all you Mello fans will be a little bit hot and bothered. For well, um, just read and find out xD

**Warning!** There is crude language in this chapter all because of Mello. He finally gets some _**luvin'**_.

Discaimer: As I have said the past nine chapters and all my other fanfics, I own nothing.

Title of the chapter is named after the song _Sound of Madness_ by Shinedown.

**Chapter 10** – Sound of Madness

=3=

The moment Light first laid eyes on the first case he was to take part in, albeit a shadowed part since he was too young to be in the field, he knew this was where he belonged. The Yagami prodigy and once potential successor of L had spent his childhood years admiring his father's career. After years of lying dormant, the admiration and swell of pride came flooding back.

In that moment, a memory which had been buried deep, also surfaced. The shock of the murder had him forget the important detail as to who had carried out such brutality against Chief Yagami and his wife.

It started when he came down the stairs, ready for breakfast and his routine of cartoons, for it had been a wonderful Saturday morning. When he reached the bottom of the stairs and into the kitchen he found his mother staring at a newspaper laid out on the kitchen table. He read two different emotions from her face. She had a sense of pride in a loving fashion, yet there was a hint of an internal struggle to hide the concern bubbling up in her expression.

When she realized he was there, she quickly hid her troubles and greeted him with a warm smile as if nothing happened. Confused, Light went along with the sudden change. At the same time he silently hoped she would be too distracted in making his breakfast to put the newspaper away. For whatever was printed was the cause of his mother's discomfort.

His chance came when his sister's crying forced Sachiko away from the kitchen to upstairs. Light quickly slid off his chair for a closer look at the newspaper, he wished not to disturb the paper or else she would know he had been going through it, still open to whatever his mother had been reading.

To his surprise it had been about his father, Detective Yagami solving the case of a serial killer the public nicknamed the Demon of Tokyo. Apparently this man, Light could not recall the real name of the criminal, had once lured men and women into his apartment where he proceeded to rape and slaughter his victims then dumping and scattering the bodies anywhere from dumpsters to the bays near fishing factories. If he had read between the lines correctly, it would seem the Demon preferred the men more than the woman.

A bit disturbed, Light had skipped over the rest of what the criminal had done and read where it mentioned his father once more. It was pointed out that it was likely Detective Yagami would be promoted to Chief Detective of his team, due to his months of cracking this case. The young boy felt a sense of bewilderment and delight at the same moment.

He was more than happy for the news of his father being promoted, his admiration grew and Light began to imagine he too, can follow his father's footsteps and bring justice upon the ill conceived. When he remembered the reason why he took a peek at the newspaper, he was more confused than ever.

Why would such a promotion frighten his mother? She was proud of her husband's achievement, he could tell. So then, why would she be concerned? He couldn't ponder over such answers when he heard Sachiko's soft footsteps down the stairs and quickly went back to his seat, patiently waiting for his meal.

He had put the matter out of his mind, for he had spent his days with his father walking to parks or a zoo, if he behaved well enough. Then some two months later, it was learned the criminal had his father worked so hard to capture escaped. A few short years later, his parents were murdered.

While that horrific murder was happening, Light's sharp mind thought of the escaped Demon of Tokyo. He could not remember what the criminal looked like, but he had a feeling in his gut that told him that the man who murdered his family was none other than the Demon. But the shock of seeing the bloodied bodies in the aftermath removed the link he had connected from his mind.

Upon the memory resurfacing Light inwardly cursed himself for not speaking out at that time. Now was not the time to bring it up, not even to Watari, who had personally sought him out and brought the traumatized young Yagami to Whammy's. Light suspected that now he was working with L, Watari would most likely confide L about the once named successor's strange request to look over old cases.

With his life so busy, his thoughts didn't have the time to ponder over the strange feelings that were bubbling up inside his chest. These feelings only seem to happen when he was around L. A part of him knew he wanted to explore what this meant, but he didn't have the chances for the detective worked them around the clock. It didn't help matters that the episodes were taking form once again.

The echoes of screams and sickeningly sweet copper invaded his senses, often leaving him disoriented and weary. When these senses of hearing and smell were so intense, Light wouldn't eat. To avoid being interrogated the young man excused himself to work with Near in a different room. With Mello's constant bullying, it had been decided long ago that the two competing heirs will work separately.

During those hard times Near wouldn't question him about his strange condition. Instead the pale boy would insure that no one was to come inside their suite (as they traveled the world, they mainly lived in hotels), would put a large cross on the door and told, "Sanctuary", to anyone who wanted to come inside.

An odd sort of action, Light always thought. But when they were pressed over the Sanctuary, Near would always answer that his roommate needed some peace and quiet and wished not to be disturbed. When it became obvious they wouldn't get a straight answer, L dropped the subject altogether. But even he couldn't hide the curious and worrying thoughts he had over the strange way of Light running to Near for peace and quiet and using a cross of all things to keep everyone out. Even Watari wasn't allowed inside.

The horrors that haunted him drove any thoughts of his strange feelings for L and his wish to look into the possible link of the case that forced him out of Japan. On good days he can bear with it, and Light did his best not to go to Near very often when he was overwhelmed to the point he was on the verge of fainting.

This continued for years, to Light it seemed to have gone on for an eternity. And now, almost nine years after he and the children left Whammy's into L and Watari's care, the young man began to have nightmares. When he awoke, he didn't remember what he had dreamt about. All he knew was that something was hunting him down. As he worked, he pushed all of his horrors and the episodes to the back of his mind.

Even as he did his best to ignore, deep down Light knew that something was coming. And he didn't have a say in any of it. He didn't know what sort of danger it was, so he could not prevent it.

And that frightened him more than anything else, more than all of his past traumas combined.

=3=

At fifteen, the beginning of his career to work beside L, Light was proven an excellent right hand man. He was quick to connect what little evidence to the culprit, almost matching or rivaling L's own conclusions. At nineteen, Light was given the privilege to of working in the field as L's eyes, ears, and informant. Now at the ripened age of twenty four, Light was made an official detective working under L.

His natural good looks that seem to mature like a blooming flower in each passing year, and his charming ways of being the perfect social butterfly Light could make even a rock confess. And with the promotion, L had given Light a letter. From now on he was K, and was free to work on cases that interested him on his own if he wished.

But Light had hardly been able to take up this new offer, since he had agreed to work directly under L. Although Light was more than delighted to finally been assigned a letter and work directly with L, his growing reputation wasn't shared in Mello.

The blond began to perceive Light as a threat. A threat to becoming L's heir, no matter how many times both he and Near said he did not wish the spot. L wasn't of any help to calm them down, for it became apparent that as the years passed he was no closer to deciding than the first day he took them under his wing. Deep inside, they knew L wished more than anything to appoint Kinship as his heir. But the fear of losing Kin, and the possible threat of him becoming another B, L buried his wishes.

What was most annoying was that Light was still expected to help teach the growing boys. Even worse, he was to work in the field with Mello and Matt in tow. Matt, he did not mind, for the young teen was a capable driver if they were to chase down the culprit. And of the two, Matt was proven to be better at the back stories of their aliases. Often times they abused the idea that he and Light were brothers after so many questioned if they were.

Mello, on the other hand, was a nightmare. When he was quiet and let the other two do the talking, he would glare in a crazed sort of way that made long served detectives squirm. Mello would loudly object as Light tried to use his charms to his advantage over anyone who had a possible lead and didn't know it. The blond would rudely snort, or he would crudely joke at the elder for being queer.

But when things became serious, the culprit known and fleeing from their grasp, Mello was the best ally anyone could hope for in the field. He was quick to determine where the culprit was running to, and where they should block and corner the criminal. Under Watari's careful eye, Mello learned how to handle a gun. If there was no time, he would shoot without hesitation. He never hit any major arteries or life threatening areas of the body. He would often go for the leg or the shoulder if the culprit was too fast.

And once all was over and done with, Mello would be more bearable to be around. The blond was content enough to be nice to Light. Taking advantage of the strange short time Mello was well behaved, Light would take them out for a little celebration. Usually they went to a nearby café or a little restaurant that was quiet and no one bothered to stare at the odd threesome.

That is where they were now, in a café in Berlin, Germany. They had just finished a case of a serial killer who sought young women ranging from high school to early years of college. The case had been a wild one, for at the beginning they didn't see a connection between victims, or if the high school and college girls were victims of the same killer.

They had just begun to eat, Mello ordered a rich German chocolate cake, Matt with a banana crème pie, and Light simply had coffee when a familiar voice rang in the air.

"Well, would you look at that! I thought it was you, when I saw the back of your pretty head from the entrance! How long has been, old friend?"

Light turned to see a strapping blond man in his prime with fine clothes and large headphones hung around his neck. Recognizing his old roommate, Light quickly stood up and accepted Mu's tight embrace in their unexpected yet happily accepted reunion.

"I go by Kyle Kuefer, at the present moment." Light whispered so low only Mu could hear.

"I am Frederick Herrmann." Mu responded just as quietly.

When they pulled apart the two old friends examined the other, seeing how the years had been kind during the long years apart. Mu had discarded the old shirts of 80's rock bands and moved on to a more professional appearance. He wore a long sleeved black buttoned up shirt tucked into a matching pair of khakis, and a white vest over the shirt.

Mu's blond hair was shorter than he remembered, but the cut went well with the outfit and made his overall appearance rather dashing. He was as if he just got out of performing a concert of some sort with classical instruments or something of the like. What caught Light off guard though was a hint of a red tattoo peeking out from the collar of the shirt, he couldn't quite make out what the design was.

Still, the young man didn't question it. He was too delighted to see Mu after such a long time apart to really care for the little changes in his former roommate.

"I see that you've grown up since the last time we met." Light commented with a chuckle.

"Oh, stop that. I was a young lad, then. Hanging on to old things that were most familiar to me, you know? And look at you! The years have been treating you kindly, old friend. You look as handsome as you were back in high school." Mu eyed him admiringly as he made up the most probable of a cover story for their long years apart.

Blushing at the combination of the comment and scrutinizing gaze, Light quickly changed the subject.

"Would you care to sit down with us? I'm sure you remember my younger brother Max, and this here is our friend Mikhail."

Matt offered a polite greeting, while Mello simply glared at the stranger with suspicion and distrust. The obnoxious teen did not like the way this man was eying Kin, and uncontrollable rage began to build. For now Mello was content to sit and watch their guest. He was completely ignoring his cake as he stared and listened intently.

Light pulled out the empty seat to his right, which his former roommate sat down. Matt was to Mu's right, who was beside Mello to Light's left in full circle. He briefly thought of a pattern of auburn and blond haired boys sitting in the circular table.

"Ah, yes, he was quiet when he was younger if my memory is correct." Mu said, recognizing the pair. "I see you guys already ordered."

"If you would like, you can order –" Light was cut off by an unexpected move from the younger blond.

"Here, you can have my cake. I don't have much of an appetite anymore. This should be enough for you, yeah?" Mello promptly pushed the plate towards Mu without waiting for an answer.

Both Light and Matt stared at the leather clad teen as if he grew an extra head. Replacing the crazed stare was a calm, almost charming expression across his young face. It would seem Mello had picked up some of Light's charisma in his acting skills. He would have pulled it off perfectly if not were the strange tone in his voice. One would have thought there was poison in that cake.

Mu didn't seem to be bothered, as he picked up a fork and began to eat. He blinked in surprise of the rich flavor.

"You sure you want me to have this? You're missing out on the best German chocolate cake I've ever tasted."

"If it pleases you, then go ahead and eat. You are our guest at the table, after all. You should have whatever you like." Mello answered with a plain shrug, his smile broadening.

The scent of blood was overpowering, and Light could have sworn his drink darken into a crimson shade in the corner of his eye. He looked down to see the normal light brown of coffee with cream.

"Thank you very much for your hospitality. So, how have been things going with you, Kyle? I heard you had helped in the capture of that madman who hunted down those poor girls." Mu had recognized the alias in the paper. The criminal that he mentioned had made the morning's headlines.

"Everything's been great, actually. For a while I thought I'd never reach this level in the criminal justice field. And yeah, that case took some time to crack, but I'm just grateful to have the guy apprehended and unlikely to walk away free." Light briefly eyed his coffee, unsure if he wanted to drink it or not.

"What about you? What have you been doing? You seem to have landed a successful job, with that kind of attire."

"I'm in the forensics field, working on tracking the money of suspected criminals of fraud or suspicious people who had taken up their victim's identity. I get paid well enough that, I now own a mansion."

Light blinked in surprise. Thus far, he had been paid handsomely for his efforts. But he was never one to shop around, unless it was for any clothes he needed. It seemed much has changed for Mu over the years if he bought a mansion. Years ago his roommate was too humble to even dream of owning one.

"Really? I've never thought you ever wanted a mansion. What's it like?" Curious, Light threw his best charming smile.

"It's a lovely mansion with the best view of Fuji. The gardens are the best one could ever dream of. I love to sit around in summer nights and relax as I stare out into the fair world. But recently, it has become a rather lonely existence. So I decided to take a vacation and explore the parts of the world I've always dreamed of visiting."

'_Not only has he grown out of his humble personality, he's picked up a high class way of speaking. But something's not right, here. I can't place what it is, but I can't shake this feeling he's not telling me everything.'_

Light did not wish to suspect Mu of anything, but his instincts of a detective have been cultivated and honed over the years. Thus far he had never been wrong, and for the first time the young man wished that he really was.

"By Fuji, do you mean Mount Fuji? Is it a modern mansion or a traditional Japanese style?"

At the questions, Mu merely laughed. He was only halfway done with the cake when he set the fork down and turned his full attention towards his younger roommate.

"How about this, why won't you come and see it for yourself? It has been too long since you've set foot in your home country, this way I can also have a hearty welcome of company. We can also properly catch up the years we lost. We can leave now, if you'd like."

Something about this invitation disturbed the brunette. As if to prove his gut was right, next to him Mello's stare hardened while Matt, who had been playing with his PSP, tensed.

"I don't know. It would be too sudden for me to leave work without notice. I also have to take care of my brother. I am all he has left, you know."

"Oh, your brother and his friend are more than welcome to come with you of course. The more the merrier, as they always say!" Mu heartily exclaimed, not at all brushed off by Light's nervousness.

"We'll have to think about it. When's the best convenient time for us to give you a call?" The invitation was tempting, but he wished to speak to L and see what he thinks of the entire situation.

"I'm afraid this is my last day in Germany. I'm leaving later this afternoon around seven."

"I'm sorry to say that's too soon for us. But if we're ever in Japan, I'll be sure to look you up."

"Oh, please, there's no need. Here, I can give you my business card. It has my address as well as my house and cell numbers." Mu reached for his wallet and pulled out a black business card with white letterings and designs over it.

Light accepted the handed card with care, not even glancing at the name to confirm the numbers or address.

"Thank you, I'm sure we can find the time to call and say we will be more than happy to visit."

"So long as it happens, I shall patiently wait for now. By the way, I'm curious, are you currently going out with someone? I don't mean to sound too impolite on such matters, but I'll gamble on this one chance." Mu eyed him as if he were some prize.

"What do you mean 'this one chance'?" The scent of blood nearly made him hyperventilate, but a rational part of his mind kept him calm on the outside.

"Well, in this chance of our meeting, I have to say I've never set eyes on anyone as handsome as you, old friend. It has made me wonder how I never noticed your charms when we were younger."

Now extremely disturbed, Light felt tempted to get up and walk away. He was about to answer when Mu reached for his chin, trapping him in an intense gaze.

"So, what will your answer be, Raito?"

At the mention of the name, horror seeped through his mask and was shown for the world to see.

"What's the matter? That is how to say your name, isn't it?"

Before Light could even scream, Mello ripped away Mu's hand and pulled the brunette closer to him.

"Get your filthy hands off of what is _mine_!"

Alarmed, Mu glared at the pair with a mix of disgust and disbelief.

"Are you two really a couple, or is this a bluff for you to protect each other?" The elder blond challenged.

Through his own angry glare, Mello grinned widely. Light could feel the teen accepting the challenge.

"You want proof? Well, this should be enough to convince you otherwise." Before the brunette could protest, Mello pulled him into a rough kiss. In complete shock Light opened his mouth to speak, only to be silenced by a foreign and yet skillful tongue that was not his own.

Since arguing was pointless, Light reluctantly closed his eyes and went along with whatever Mello was trying to prove. The teen tasted of dark chocolate, his favorite flavor among the numerous chocolates he had stashed around.

To Light's surprise, the kiss was full of passion. Mello was still rough, but the passion and lust he was pouring into their lip on lip action. The young man wondered where all of this was based on in the blond's head. All too soon Mello pulled away, leaving Light blushing darkly and a little out of breath.

"I didn't know you guys were a couple! How long has this been going on behind my back? When were you going to tell me anything?" Matt exclaimed, whether or not he believed that show or not wasn't easy to tell.

Mello only chuckled at his friend's frantic words and appearance. He was most delighted for finally pulled Light off of his pedestal in the most rewarding of ways.

"He's been too shy for any public affection. Too scared how everyone would think of him, I guess. But I suppose the cat's out of the bag, eh Kyle? How about we tell your old friend how we spend our nights together making lovely love?" Mello cooed at the last bit, before continuing in a darker tone.

"How I've always made you moan, beg, and scream in whatever surface I decide to fuck you on. Or how much of a closet masochist you are despite how you always want to be in control of everything. I love seeing you crumble under my ministrations, you know? And don't forget how kinky you are inside, just waiting to burst out of its shell."

"M–Mikhail!" Light whined, obviously embarrassed from the curious and horrified stares.

"What's the matter? Last time I checked you always loved the attention. In fact, you _crave_ it like a man addicted to drugs, yeah?" The younger blond teased.

The brunette squirmed in his chair, uncomfortable with the choice of words. Light closed his eyes in hopes to hide the fact what Mello had said was true. Not the part of the pair doing anything the business of lovers, of course.

'_Damn you, Mello! You stole my first kiss! And a French one at that! I'll kill you once we're safe at the hotel, you bastard!'_ Light cursed at the bizarre situation he had somehow been wrapped into.

"So, do you believe me now, about me and K?" Mello turned his attention back at their guest.

Mu raised an eyebrow above narrowed eyes. "K?"

"That's my nickname for him." Mello grinned, knowing full well Mu understood what he meant.

Threatening a letter under L's command would bring harsh punishment on anyone. A once orphan from Whammy's would be no exception to L's wrath. Mu took the threat seriously, for he announced his leave in a dark tone.

"Well, I see I have over welcomed my stay. I suppose I should be going, now."

The elder blond stood up from his seat. As he was leaving, he stopped and turned to his former roommate.

"Guard yourself well. I did not mean to threaten you with your nickname from our childhood days in Japan. I only wished to confirm if it were true. Since it has, I advise you to be extra careful from now on. There is someone out there who wishes to harm you. I am sorry I cannot say more."

And with that, Mu strolled out the door and disappeared into the street.

'_He knows. He knows my real name. The only other person who knows is…but how and when did they come into contact with each other? What's going on?'_

Confused and afraid, Light couldn't say a word to the other two. Against his better judgment he leaned close to Mello, who remained silent and Light took as a 'go ahead' gesture. The teen still had his arms around him, and Mello was _there_. He just happened to be close enough for Light to lean on someone, anyone.

For a few minutes they stayed like this. All three were quiet and tense, unsure what to do or think about what had just transpired. There was little to be done now, other than get up and call Watari. Once they come back to their current hotel, L must be informed about this incident.

All three came to the same conclusion, for they prepared to get up at the same time. Mello watched as Kin moved about like a robot, void of any emotions. The blond wondered how Kin's original name was known, but he knew now was the time to question. If he was reading the elder right, Kin was in shock.

Mello couldn't blame him, really. To know the true name, especially of a letter, will be a weapon to shut him down as an important and close ally of L. This was a rare and very sensitive predicament for them. And whoever was targeting Kinship, will most likely be going after everyone else he had been working with for the past several years.

'_It has to be someone who once went to Whammy's. But who? The only one who went rogue was…'_

They shuddered before they could finish such similar thoughts. The three hoped that what they suspect wasn't true.

=3=

The drive back to the hotel was eerily silent. Watari grew concerned as the time passed with more silence. He was used to picking the three up in a bickering state, with Mello screaming at the top of his lungs and Kinship yelling back in defiance. Even Matt would speak, in his attempt to calm them down.

'_Something must have happened. Whatever took place in that café, all three of them are frightened.'_ Watari came down to the grim conclusion. Seldom were these brave souls afraid of anything, let alone from the same source.

The boys remained quiet even as they arrived at their destination. As he led them into the hotel, Watari noticed how the boys seemed to be closer together as if following the general rule of prey _safety in numbers_. Watari's concern grew, and he quickly searched for a premade text in his phone for a situation like this and sent it. It wasn't an emergency, but more of a warning that there's something urgent that needs his full attention.

Upon entering Room 323, they were greeted with a concerned L and Near, who was currently arranging a circle around himself consisting of toy robots before the couch. L was sitting in the love seat, knees against his chest while his hands worked on adding more sugar to his tea.

"You sent a text, Watari. What has happened?" Not one to waste time, the detective went straight to the point.

"I am afraid I do not know myself. For it happened to the boys in the café I picked them up from." Was the honest answer an honest man could give.

Watari stepped aside for the boys to face L, who inspected them from head to toe.

"Well? Will someone care to answer my question?"

"There was a graduate of Whammy's at the café. He was an old friend of mine, actually. He warned us that someone out there is targeting me, and knows my real name. And if I am reading in between the lines, he told me that this person is hiding in Japan at the moment." Light was the first to come forward.

"Who was it who brought such grave news to you, and why isn't he here to explain all of this to me?" L pressed hard for answers.

"He's Music, or Mu for short. He said he had to leave and prepare for a plane out. He didn't say where he was going. He only said he was here on vacation and today was his last day."

"So it was your roommate. Someone you would trust. Did he mention what time his plane was leaving?"

Light nodded. "He said it was sometime around seven, local time I believe."

"What is the alias he gave you?"

"Frederick Herrmann. Blond, around my age and height, should have large amount of money to that name."

"Watari, please do a background check of Sir Herrmann. And while you're at it, look into today's flight schedules for that name or anyone who matches his description." L directed, before advising that Matt should help.

Both nodded at their instructions before getting to work on their computers. Although Watari's was perfectly capable to do this, Matt wanted to do what he does best and put his hacking skills to use.

As the computers were firing up, L returned to the boys with a frown.

"Did he say who was targeting you and why?"

"No."

"Did you ever reveal your true name to anyone else, if by accident?"

"No."

"Did you write your name down somewhere, and someone walked by and read it over your shoulder?"

"No."

"Did you tell your roommate? Perhaps in a dare, or he threatened you to tell him?"

"Ryuzaki! I took Watari's warning, and believe me what I say, I never told _anyone my name!_" Light shouted, losing patience and control over his emotions.

Before L could demand for a better answer, the distraught young man continued.

"There was only one person in the damn orphanage who knew my name! I didn't tell him, he only saw my face and knew instantly who I was! He whispered my name, saying it in the wrong language, but it was the same nonetheless. Why else did you think I had a nervous breakdown?"

All eyes were on Light, all but one ever truly believing what he said.

"…Beyond Birthday knew your name as soon as he saw you? I find this hard to believe." L spoke in a harsh, intimidating tone. "Do you realize how much danger you put everyone of us in?"

At the spoken name, Matt stopped what he was doing and stared at the two arguing figures. Even Watari was shocked from the revelation.

"I didn't do _anything!_ Why won't you believe me? I'm telling the complete truth! I don't know how he knew, but he did say my name! Not my full name, he didn't bother whispering my surname." Light defended.

"Why would he mix up the language, then? If you are from Japan, then why would he pronounce your name differently?"

"The hell if I know! If I did, it would answer how he ever knew my name in the first place!"

"Are you sure Beyond was the only one who knew your name?"

"Yes! I never told anyone, he was the only one who ever confronted me with my name! I doubt he would have told Mu while he was in the orphanage, for B practically ignored me like the plague. What else did you want me to say, huh Ryuzaki? That I remained in contact with Mu, and told him my name, when I don't even know his?"

"And did you?" L countered.

"Of course not! Once he walked out the door, I never talked to him again. He saw me sitting with the boys at the café, and that was the first time I saw or spoke to him in years!"

"Enough! We're only going in circles right now. If you won't give me any straight answers, then I will have to send you someplace I choose and you would not have the ability to move out." L never wanted it to come down to this, but he had no choice but to throw the threat out on the table. If Kin wouldn't speak the truth then, it was inevitable to send the threat away before any of the boys were forced to be involved.

_Beep beep._

Watari's laptop gave the sound of a new case that needed L's upmost attention. Butler Man briefly went over it before he spoke in a grave voice.

"Ryuzaki, you need to have a look at this case."

"Not now, Watari, I'm in the middle of something important."

"There is a victim lying dead in an airplane in Tokyo airport. If I am correct, the killer is B."

The entire room froze, hearts stopped beating for a few precious seconds before rapidly picking up speed. L's gaze remained on Kin for a moment longer before his eyes landed on Watari.

"What did he do this time, and how in the world did he escape?"

"I will look into how he escaped, but this should be proof that what K has reported is true. B brutally murdered a passenger during flight en route to Tokyo. The victim's family reported him missing, and when the flight crew began to search they found the body in the cargo area. There are several stab wounds to the chest, arms, and legs. The victim was identified only because the face remained unharmed by the onslaught."

"So, how does this connect with K's story?" L impatiently asked.

"Above the body on the wall of the plane, B wrote in kanji, 'Catch me if you can Light Yagami, son of former Chief Detective Soichiro Yagami of the NPA'. He wrote this challenge with what is most likely the victim's blood." Watari informed.

As soon as Butler Man finished speaking Light fell to his knees, hands gripping his hair as he screamed bloody murder.

=3=

Death: Aaaahhhhhhhh~ Finally the good stuff is about to happen! I've been waiting forever to get to this point.

Um. Please don't kill me over he Mello/Light kiss. I've been a closet fan of that pairing, but was never brave enough to announce it. So I decided to mess with you guys and tested the waters, as they say. I swear to Kira that from now on the only person Light will be getting any kissing from is L.

Now would you kindly please click the lovely love review button and scream just as Light did due to the dark twist of fate I casted upon him!


	11. Revelation, Some Kind of Resolution

Death: I apologize for the long wait. Again. But, _but_, I made it my mission to make this chapter very long. And a few surprises are revealed. And some long awaited loving. And oh my god I think this is the longest chapter I have ever written. Ever. I was almost late to class in my short one hour break trying to finish this in the campus library. Now that I have finished it at home, I feel almost relieved for this chapter to be over.

I mean, this chapter took 17 pages on Word. **_17 pages!_** I believe the longest I've one for was around 15 pages, and that was for _The Last Shisou Vampire._

Disclaimer: I own nothing as I have said in all of my previous stories, which I can't remember how many I have written now.

The title of this chapter is based off of _No Light, No Light_ by Florence + the Machine. And no, the reason why I chose that song as my inspiration for this chapter was not because of the title. Although I do find it funny that I'm actually using it in this story.

**Chapter 11** – Revelation, Some Kind of Resolution

=3=

Trust is something Light took very seriously. There were very few he could put trust in anyone.

And there were different variations of trust he considered in the people around him.

He trusted Mello to have his back when they cornered a suspect. He trusted Matt to not crash the car when they had no choice but to speed chase after the runaways. He trusted Near to find any crucial evidence they have missed. He trusted Watari to do everything in his power to enforce their business as going around as L's underlings.

And he trusted L to do what he did best.

Hunt down criminals.

But all of these mentioned did not mean Light would trust his life with or for them. All except L. And Watari he trusted just as well, for the man played a crucial key to their team. He was a man who served under L since he took up his alias to take on the horrors of the world. That was something even Light had to admire about Butler Man.

Although the two friends had caught up of lost times over the years they have worked together, Light naively turned a blind eye to how sociably inept L really was. He knew the detective had trouble understanding emotions and reactions of his friend and heirs whenever he did something a little too drastic. But Light never attempted to see just how little L really understood society.

So, to look through L's angle when he found out someone knew Light's real name, it was no wonder why he was harsh towards his friend.

In a way both had been at fault. Light for not even trying to get a deeper understanding how the detective's brain was wired. L was at fault for his inability to understand the concepts of trust between friends.

Friendship was one of the strongest bonds between individuals. Yet at the same time that same bond could be just as fragile as thin glass when not cared for properly. It was unfortunate these two experienced the latter the hard and difficult way.

Inside, Light knew this. His mind was rattled and disturbed how little L seemed to show the same faith of trust he put into the detective. He understood the concepts of friendship were to give and take, never more and never less. Light just assumed L knew this simplest of logics.

Apparently, for the first time in his short twenty four years on this earth, he was wrong.

That hurt his pride. He was supposed to be a _genius_. And not just any genius, but one of L's underlings, earning a letter, the alias K. Being granted a letter from L personally, he should at least have known about L's struggle with society.

Honestly, it shouldn't be this surprising. From the very beginning he suspected L was distant and detached from the rest of the world. It shows that he cared about the world around him, but he literally had no idea what normalcy was.

Somehow Light was able to arrive to these conclusions about why L reacted the way he did.

But out of pride and sheer smite, at either himself or at L, Light did not to simply forgive the detective for his behavior. There is little to do to truly effect L emotionally. So it wasn't like the young man could be rebellious as he had done previously when their friendship was strained.

It had worked well to convince L not to pursue the idea of naming Light heir. But this was a more personal matter. It was an issue that ran deep into his very core, shaking his boundaries and his ideals. And if he were to follow the same strategy as before it would only cause more trouble than it was worth.

Instead he thought of a quieter direction to rebel. One does not always have to voice their opinions loudly and demand to have their way. Light decided to turn back the clock of the hard improvement L and Mu had put years into transforming him into a better person in general.

No, he will not be mute. But he will wear a faceless, expressionless mask.

He will be distant and detached, just as L was. Light will be diligent. Not even Near's awkward humor he had grown fond of could crack the smallest of smiles.

L shattered his trust and practically threw it at his face.

The very aspect that it actually happened disturbed him. In his mind, this should not have occurred. In many ways this twist and strain on their friendship could have been prevented.

Yet it did happen. What's done was done. There was no time machine like those in science fiction movies to turn the hands of time back and miraculously everything will be better. There was nothing he could do other than move forward. Move forward and make time for his mind to heal from the shock.

Deep down, though, Light knew L would grow impatient. At many points the detective could be the very definition of patience, unless it concerned his friend. L was blunt but honest, he expected Light to be the very same.

Which he did not mind returning, to say the least. But if it was a pressing matter L found interesting, he would continue to pester until he finally cracked Light open to claim his prize.

It was a new sort of game between them, really. It somehow developed over the years playing chess against each other when bored out of their minds. This happened to be a lot, actually. For two geniuses, nothing is really exciting anymore.

When L was done giving his friend some space, he will first ask Light to return to the land of the living. If he continued his behavior, then L would start demanding. Still if he did not give in then the detective will get furious and start taunting him. L would insult him with phrases such as 'a child throwing a tantrum' or 'a stubborn mule'.

Considering Light still had a temper, the insults will quickly grow into fights. First would come the yelling. And then it was only a matter of time before one of them threw the first punch and everything will become utter chaos.

And it will most likely never stop until Watari or one of the boys interfered to put a stop to all the madness. These sorts of situations had happened a couple times over the years.

With all of his might Light hoped it wouldn't come to that.

The two have had enough of this drifting apart. He knew this.

But not even Light could predict when he will be healed enough to face the problem at the source.

Time was the only answer. In time, the wounds will heal.

Light also knew that time wasn't exactly on their side. Not with this case that was literally thrust onto their laps.

=3=

Light became aware of his surroundings as he stared blankly at a boring wall in a simple, yet boring room. It had come to his attention that this was a different room than the one he had previously known in Berlin.

Did they switch to a different hotel? Yes, but by judging by the painting signed by an English artist, it was safe to say they were no longer in Germany.

He must have had a major shock if he couldn't recall them moving out of a country. But considering the event that had transpired before this moment, it was not quite so surprising. This was not the first time this happened to Light, so he was not stranger to question where he was and how he got here.

The first and only time something similar happened to him was when his parents died. He didn't remember when his father's coworkers arrived at the scene. He didn't remember the ride to the police station, or the fact the men tried to question and separate him from his sister. Later he was told they gave up separating the siblings when he had refused to leave the room Sayu was in.

None of those moments to this very day Light could not remember.

He couldn't say he was drugged to take a short flight over the ocean. Light didn't feel drowsy or light headed. In fact, he felt fully rested and by the announcement of his growling stomach, he was starving.

In agreement Light stood up to find the kitchen. He opened his door to find a short hallway leading into the living room. Why L went for expensive hotels, Light couldn't really bother. The detective always chose what hotel, preferring the best of the city they occupied.

Five pairs of heads turned his direction as he appeared. Light paused, briefly wondering if he should just turn around and walk back the way he came. To his luck (or perhaps he was altogether unlucky), Near was the first to address him.

"Back in the land of the living, I see. You had us worried with the way your mind hid itself in a shell and never came out."

"It wouldn't exactly be the first time. Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to fill my empty stomach with some much needed nourishment."

Light took one step when L interrupted with a stern voice.

"You will sit down. Watari, please get some food for Light–kun. Boys, why don't you three head into the work room." It wasn't a question, it was an order.

Mello scowled, openly disproving the idea of leaving the room yet he didn't complain as he grudgingly got up. Matt followed suit, giving his older potential brother a quick look. Light was too distracted to really notice what the redhead was trying to express in silent message.

Near, however, remained where he was. He sat before the flat TV screen with a tower of cards surrounding his curled up form. The pale boy always obeyed L whether he liked the order or not. This time, it would seem the detective he admired for so long had overstepped his boundaries.

"Near." L stared hard at the said teen.

"K is my roommate. And although he is older than I, he is my responsibility just as he is yours. I understand how his mind works and what he expects while you can only _assume_. Whatever you can say to him, you can say while I am here."

L didn't have time to protest when the other two boys sat back in their seats.

"If the bunny is staying, then I'm staying too." Mello declared loudly as he crossed his legs and dug out some chocolate from his pocket.

"Let's face it Ryuzaki, you are at fault on this one." Matt added with bitterness that surprised Light.

L turned his gaze on Watari, pleading for help. But the old man didn't acknowledge him and instead made his way to the kitchen to make enough food for everyone. With a sigh, L accepted defeat. This time.

"Fine, you boys can stay. I do ask however you three remain quiet while I address Light–kun."

"May I ask that you not call me that? It's a little unnerving to hear someone say it after so many years of being forced to abandon it."

The detective stared at him with a tilt of his head as if he were pondering over the figure before him. It was not the words that bothered him, but the lack of emotion in them. This sudden change in the young man disturbed L.

He said not a word on the matter and instead nodded, accepting the request with ease.

"Very well, then. Until you are comfortable for me to call you Light–kun again, from now on I shall say Yagami–kun."

His attempt to rouse a retort of some sort from his friend failed when Light simply sat down on the couch next to him. The young man didn't appear affected with the taunt. L mentally frowned at the lack of reaction.

Usually by defying him for even a little bit would turn into an argument.

"We're not children anymore, L. So cut the attitude and say what you want to say."

Well, at least he got half of what he expected. Though it didn't feel right to be insulted without a reason as to why he was a jerk.

'_There is still a lack of emotion in his voice, though.'_ L noted in the back of his mind. _'Is he trying to revert back to the days where he kept everyone away at arm's length?'_

If the boys weren't in the room he would have immediately set aside what he planned to discuss and demand what Light was doing. Also, L had the feeling that if he did so even with the three teenagers within earshot Light would still be an emotionless doll.

And then L would be made the bad guy in this equation once more. He's already had enough when they were still in Germany.

"In that case, let us get down to business. I would like first to say that I apologize for my behavior in our last discussion. Your name was known, and I suppose it would be safe to say I panicked. A name we are born with is our keepsake. I had jumped to conclusions when I should have examined all details of the story until I can decide whether you were at fault or not."

'_So you're playing neutral, are you? You still didn't believe me when I told the truth, L. At the moment you don't know what to believe until we get our hands on B.'_ Light crossed his arms, almost scowling.

But he had an image to keep up. He did promise himself to wear an expressionless mask around everyone else.

"You still don't believe me, then." The young man stated.

"I did not say such a thing. Although yes, technically I still doubt B would know a person's name just by _looking_ at someone, there are things about him that I find most puzzling that I have yet to solve. So perhaps you are correct, and I just simply refuse to believe it because it would venture into the supernatural world." L replied dryly.

"Ah, so unless we have hard evidence then you wouldn't believe me." Light shrugged when the hermit of a man was about to retort.

"Anyway, have you guys at least found any leads on this case? I do not believe Watari gave us the victim's name last I remember."

For a brief moment L hesitated. Tilting his head, Light blinked at the detective with wonder. He had a dreadful feeling in his chest.

"What's wrong?"

"We have reason to believe that the victim is Mu. At least I believe this man was Mu. I find it curious that someone would randomly come up to you, claiming to be your previous roommate and long time friend when the real Mu was stationed in Japan."

Light stared at L in disbelief. He met Mu, Mello and Matt was there with him!

'_But there was something off about him. And what looked like a tattoo or something hidden by the collar of his shirt is suspicious.'_ A part of him suspected the man he met was a stranger.

First he would need hard evidence, though.

"Show me the files. I need to see if the victim really is Mu. And if he is Music, then the man who came forward as him is just as dangerous as B."

What's more, it couldn't be just a coincidence this happened around the same time as the murder was discovered.

L reached for the folder on the table next to him and handed it over. Just as Light held the folder in his lap, Watari reappeared with a huge tray of food sorted out. Reminded how starving he was, the young man eagerly reached for a piece of toast and began to eat while his free hand sorted through the folder.

The victim was indeed a natural blond. He was the right age to be Mu. What's more, according this file, the victim's work was in the computer forensics field. All right, it was all just a coincidence in Light's mind. But what really got him was what the man had in his possession on the flight to Tokyo.

His travel bag consisted with a personal computer that has yet to be accessed by the authorities who confiscated it. Apparently the computer was too heavily protected for any normal person to carry around with. Next there were a number of CDs ranging from too many different genres to say what this man's favorite was.

And then there was the clincher. The victim carried an address book with a few notes in the back for appointments. In between a few pages were cut out prints of the cases Light had worked on with the L Team. It would seem Mu was up to date with all cases the Dream Team were on, but by the number of photographs of Light in many disguises L instructed him to wear, Mu kept particular attention on him.

Light also noted the fact Mu married a woman who's family died unexpectedly in a car accident where a drunk driver crushed her parents and little sister. They had been married for about two years. Mu had left behind a young boy and widow.

'_I knew he cared too much. Didn't I say his overly caring personality would be his downfall?'_

Still, Light hadn't thought that Mu would end up dying like _this_.

Suddenly not feeling he had an appetite anymore, Light set his half eaten toast back on the tray before carefully putting the files back in order. Upon closing the folder the young man handed it back to L.

"It is Mu. B murdered him, most likely knowing exactly who he was." Light stated. "He's trying to get to my head. What's more he has an accomplice. It's impossible the man I met in the café was Mu. That man did not have a wedding ring. Also, he had what could be a tattoo on his neck."

L frowned at this. "It is unlike B to work with another person. He prefers to work by himself. But at the same time he does tend to go to the extreme to get close to the investigation. If that man was his accomplice, what worries me is why they would go to so much trouble making it too easy to connect the dots."

Right, Light had nearly forgotten how complicated B would try to make a case so difficult.

"If he were challenging L, then yes, he would create the most difficult case possible. However, what if L was not his target?" Near spoke up from his spot in his tower of cards.

"Are you implying he's challenging Yagami–kun?" L seemed bothered by this, as if he had considered the possibility as well but not quite come to terms with it.

"He did write K's name, didn't he? Also his victim was Mu, who happens to be a close friend of K. B would know Mu since he was still in the orphanage when K was brought to England. And don't forget that he set up the challenge in K's home turf." Near twirled a curl between two fingers as he continued on the list.

"And yet, it is most likely B knows we are working together. So, what is his purpose to challenge _only_ K and not at all acknowledge L, his greatest rival?"

Silence filled the room as the inquiry sank in. Only the sound of Mello crunching on his chocolate bar could be heard, echoing about in the large spaced room.

"He's trying to separate us." The blond concluded.

"For what purpose? Wouldn't B have a personal vendetta to deal with against L?" Matt pointed out.

"Perhaps that is the very reason why he's doing this at all. To get to L, B would first have to ensnare K. His intentions could vary from harm to killing or even to use K against L, to hurt L where he is most vulnerable." At the last word Near added another card not so carefully on his tower. He watched as the fragile structure crumbled and scattered on the floor.

It was then Light had a revelation. All this time, Near had been calling him K, not Kin. It was not because he was distancing himself, but instead it was a subtle hint. B was after Light because of the letter L assigned to him.

K.

It could be a symbol of many things.

Kinship. Kin. King. Kind. Kindness.

_Killer_.

Was it just him, or was B using a lot of deep symbolism here?

'_He wants to separate me from the rest of the team. But, why me? He could do just as well to do the same with any of the other three. What makes me so special?'_

Deep down, Light knew why. He just couldn't face the answer. Yes, he would admit he was in denial. But this was for his own sanity's sake. If he were to accept what B was trying to do, Light knew he would succeed in one way or another.

It took all of his self control not to scream out as he did that day when this case came to them.

=3=

In a matter of two days the group debated on what to do. It was clear they have no other choice but to head towards Japan. But to work on this case, they would need help. With the help of Watari, L contacted the associates of former NPA chief Soichiro Yagami and requested their cooperation.

Without hesitation all accepted. They knew of this case, and all men aspired to work on it anyway. The fact L was paying attention to this bizarre case gave them hope. First L instructed them to keep a close eye on Sayu Yagami. It was a high chance she would be tangled up in this mess.

Next, L devised how this team will work with the detectives in Japan.

Mello and Matt were going to be in the work field as usual. Since B most likely knew their faces, the pair didn't need to disguise themselves for this case. But L heavily suggested using their aliases when in public, especially when around the Japanese homicide detectives.

Near was watch over the surveillance while he went over all of the evidence. The boy had a talent of finding missing pieces of the puzzle when it came down to reading the clues they had gathered together.

Watari would work back and forth between L and the detectives as the shadow he was perceived to be when assuming L's representative in public. Butler Man was to work closely with the detectives while Mello and Matt work from afar, yet still within a moments reach if anything were to happen.

Light, however, was to be confined to work behind the scenes with L. On the outside, he wasn't too bothered by the change. Inside, he was seething with anger as to why he was stuck with the insomniac while Near got a room all to himself to work in.

Still the young man didn't put up a fight or complaint at the assigned job. He knew L was just simply keeping him close to ensure he was not going to do something stupid.

Light was tempted to do something stupid, though. Such as punching the man in the face for not putting faith in him.

But there was little he could do. Light continued his act with the expressionless mask. He was becoming rather annoyed how the rest of the team would attempt to rouse any reaction from him. Mello would jump out of nowhere to tackle him to the floor. Matt would playfully ruffle his hair. Near would aim a paper airplane or any object that wouldn't bring harm at his stomach.

Hell, even Watari was trying to crack a few jokes at him.

No, what was worse though was how much L would _taunt _him. A few times Light's eye twitched or his hands would shake from by sheer will not to punch the panda face.

Honestly, it was hard for Light to realize that only two days had gone by. It seemed more like an eternity until, upon the third day, as they settled in their new headquarters in Japan, everything took an unexpected turn.

Light had just finished unpacking when he appeared in a living room turned into L's spacious make shift office.

The moment he sat down Light was in for another attack. This time, Mello had a plan. The blond had jumped over the back of the couch and pushed the brunette into the cushions while straddling his victim's waist.

Out of reflex Light was about to throw a punch at Mello's face, but the blond was too fast. He caught the young man's wrist and held the hand above Light's head. In a matter of seconds his other hand joined with the first.

Mello's triumphant smirk faltered when Light's mask didn't even so much as _crack_.

"Damn it all to hell, Kin! Cut the crap already and go back to the way you were! I'm sick and tired of that damn expressionless face of yours. You're scaring all of us!"

"Get off, Mello. _Now_." Light was surprised with how angry his voice sounded. He hadn't meant to show emotion through it.

The blond blinked at the older male below him. To Light's horror Mello's classic sneer made itself known as he leaned closer.

"What's the matter, Kin? You didn't have any problems with me kissing you back at the café in Germany."

"That, Mello dear, was different. At the very least I am grateful for your move. Otherwise I would have shot myself for kissing a man impersonating Mu."

Blue eyes narrowed at the lack of emotion in the other's voice. Maybe if he took his plan one step further…

"So are you saying you liked that kiss, Light? How about I give you another one? Just for the fun of kissing. I don't hand my lips to just _anyone_ you know."

For the first time the mask Light had so carefully cultivated and molded to perfection cracked. Mello was beside himself in joy for finally getting a reaction out of the stoic team mate. Even though the blond was giddy at his success, he was true to his word and leaned in.

The second their lips touched Light snapped. His arms struggled to be freed from Mello's constricting grasp. No matter what he did the blond would not let up. So Light went for a different plan.

He first opened his mouth briefly in the kiss, his entire body relaxing as if he were giving up. Mello bought the bait and kissed him more passionately. Before the blond could sneak his tongue into his mouth however, Light bit hard on the intruding lips.

Taking full advantage of the split second he needed the elder male used his long legs to roll on top of the blond. Or he meant to anyways. If they were on a bed Light would have succeeded. But since they were on the couch the pair ended up rolling onto the floor.

Near, who had taken his usual spot before the flat screen, had to quickly scoot out of the way of Mello catapulting towards him. The blond landed in a pile of robot toys, breaking a few of their arms and legs in the process.

Mello didn't pay any heed to the pain, though. He was too focused on getting back at the brunette for biting his lip.

"Light, you fucking bastard, you're going to pay for what you did!"

The said male didn't have enough time to dodge out of the way when the blond launched himself at him. Once again Light was trapped between Mello and the couch. This time the young man was putting his all into this fight.

"You're the one who kissed me in the first place you little cunt!" The brunette elbowed the younger man in the face.

Mello outright seethed at the insult. He kneed the elder in the stomach for payback.

"_Cunt!?_ You calling me a _vagina_ you little fuck? In case you haven't noticed, I'm one hundred percent penis!"

Despite the pain in his gut, Light couldn't hold back a snicker.

"Gee, the way you carry yourself around, I wouldn't have known."

With a yell the two became a flurry punches, elbows, knees and kicks. A couple of times biting each other's arms or hands was uncalled for, but the pair weren't intentionally playing fair. Days and perhaps months of tension were released into this fight.

In the background Near was calling for the others to come and help. Neither blond nor brunette paid any attention to the pale boy. Not even when Near attempted to pull Mello off of his roommate.

Mello just shoved the small nuisance aside. Out of his peripheral vision Light saw the white head hit hard against the table next to the couch. The pale boy curled up like an armadillo, tiny hands covering the spot his head connected to furniture.

The blond hesitated for a moment when caramel brown eyes darkened to a carmine red. Mello didn't have time to ponder the strange transformation when he was sent flying against the wall from a powerful kick to his chest. He stared wide eyed in horror at the young man before him. Mello even backed up into a corner, curling his legs to his chest.

Light would have launched another attack on the blond if two different pairs of hands hadn't held him back. For a few brief seconds the brunette struggled against Matt and L's hold. But when he saw Watari holding a needle, the fire in his eyes died down into a faint flicker. The threat of being knocked out by drugs was frightful enough to snap him out of his berserk mode.

Instinctively Light leaned into L as if he would protect him from Butler Man.

"Have you calmed down enough not to attack Mello?" L inquired, noticing the sudden change.

"Just don't drug me. You above all should know I hate them." Light eyed Watari warily. "I won't lose my temper again."

"I say knock him out!" Mello shouted. "He's not human, not the way his eyes are burning red."

"You're the one who started this by invading my personal space and initiated another unwanted kiss!" The brunette retorted.

"Well I got you to destroy that mask of yours, didn't I? You've been scaring us with the way you've been behaving this past few days!"

"Says the one who practically molested me."

"I can't help it you bastard. You're too fucking gorgeous _not_ to have a taste." Mello cocked his head to the side, taking in the sight of Light comfortably leaning into L, whose arms protectively wrapped around the brunette.

"Of course, I suppose you think I don't deserve your attention with the way you've been ogling L for the past several years!"

Absolute horror spread across Light's face without his consent.

"I have not been ogling him! You're just full of yourself you fucking cunt!"

"You have too! And stop calling me that you fucking bastard! Don't think I haven't noticed how you let him be close to you, closer than you allow the rest of us anyway. Sure, you're protective over Near, but that's not the same as how you interact with L!"

"Says you! You're just jealous over something that's not true!"

"Oh yeah? Then tell me, _Light–kun_, why the hell are you blushing then?"

For once Light was at a loss of words. Indeed he could feel the faint pink in his cheeks that darkened at Mello's observation. With a scowl Light looked away, hoping with all his might that this will end now.

"If you boys are done yelling at each other, then I believe now is the time for our team to diverse. Watari, would you please escort the three to their respective headquarters? It would seem I was right to assume it be best to separate the boys until all of this has blown over."

"Yes, of course Ryuzaki." Watari turned to the teenagers with a sigh. "Will you please gather up your things? We will be leaving now. Anything you can't gather in a few minutes I will retrieve for you later."

Butler man then turned his attention to the team leader.

"And please, Ryuzaki, both of you better be alive by the time I get back."

"You need not to worry, Watari. So long as I treat him as my equal, he will not lose his temper."

"Don't speak as if I were not here!" Light's scowl deepened.

"My apologies, Yagami–kun." L didn't sound so apologetic.

Watari sighed once more, still obviously worried. Still he had a job to do. The old man felt it was best do it quickly and race back to the hotel before anything disastrous happened.

"Come on, boys. Let's take our leave."

Matt helped Mello to his feet. Together the two headed out the door to wait in the hallway. Near was rubbing his sore spot with one hand while he reached for Light's hair with his other hand.

Light blinked at the action. Before he could ask what the pale boy was doing, the small hand was patting his head. The young man almost cried at how similar the action was when Sayu did the same thing when she said her goodbye. But a fascination kept the tears at bay.

Why did everyone want to run their hand through his hair in comfort?

And before he knew it Near had followed Butler Man out of the suite, leaving him in a precarious situation. Light almost screamed when he realized he could feel half hard erection against his lower back. Against his better judgment the young man wiggled as he tried to escape L's embrace.

"Um, Ryuzaki…"

"Mello had the right idea of putting a stop to your behavior. I did not foresee that he would go to this extreme, though." L cut him off, his arms tightening their hold around the trapped brunette.

"Ryuzaki, I'm suddenly feeling the notion we shouldn't be alone together."

L seemed puzzled by this.

"What gave you that idea, Light–kun? It's because of your behavior that I am forced to do this."

"To do _what_ exactly?" Light just about shrieked.

"To take matters into my own hands, of course. Didn't Mello just point out your strong admiration for me? He's not the only one to notice. I always thought it was simple admiration, but from what I understand what he really meant, I am beginning to believe it's more than that."

Furious, the young man forced his way out of the warm embrace to turn around and face the other.

"Don't say it as if it means nothing to you! Honestly Ryuzaki, if you only cared enough about performances, all you had to do was ask. Or at the very least sound as if you were really sorry for what you did!"

"But I am sorry, Light–kun. I've been expressing it in every possible way I know how. How can I make you understand that I am at least trying?" L heavily sighed. "And by the way, I said nothing about keeping up performance. I am simply worried about you."

Light scoffed at the other man's words. But even he was beginning to doubt his side of the argument.

"Ryuzaki, I know how socially inept you are. I get it. But why the sudden interest of transforming our friendship to something that could be potentially disastrous for everyone?"

"Ah, a very good point indeed, Light–kun. But I do have an answer." To prove his point, the detective reached for the brunette's hand.

Light raised an elegant brow. "Oh? And what is this solution that would miraculously make everything better?"

"If you do have feelings for me, then I would be happy to oblige those feelings. But I will do it only if you are willing to take that step. You are dear to me, Light–kun. You are my first friend, and the first person aside from Watari I can entrust my faith into. Therefore, I am willing to explore the possibility of a relationship."

L stared at the gaping young man before him, expressing in all he could that he was dead serious. And, he had to say, it was rather cute to see that pink blush deepen across pale cheeks. But what surprised L the most was how frightened Light appeared.

Although his body gave no indication of fear, the honey brown eyes gave away the true emotions that ran a hundred miles an hour in his head.

"But…but _why_? Why would you do this? I mean, I don't even know if I even _want_ to go through with this. Not if you're only doing this just to make me happy, because it won't work. That's not what relationships are about Ryuzaki."

"You're lying, Light–kun. I can tell by the speed of your pulse that you really want to. As to why I would offer you this opportunity, I would like to make it clear that I don't hand my heart to just anyone, Light."

Although Mello had said similar words just five minutes prior, L's had an entirely different effect.

He broke eye contact. He just couldn't look into those dark panda eyes. Light felt self-conscious about his behavior and his appearance, and he didn't even know why. Well, perhaps the answer was obvious, but once again Light was fleeing from the very idea.

"It's just that… I…"

"You, what, Light–kun? Tell me what it is you wanted to say." L gently encouraged.

"It can't be just about me, all right? If we are going to take this step, and I mean this is a _major _step, we have to be careful about approaching this Ryuzaki. You have to have some indication that you really want to be with me not because _I_ want to, but because _you_ truly see a future with me other than just someone to work alongside with."

L tilted his head. "I would suffice to say this would be rather easy to accommodate, Light–kun. Just a minute ago I thought your blush was rather cute."

Light sputtered at the blunt (and yet unwelcome) compliment. "Th-that's not the _point_, Ryuzaki! What I mean is –"

L unexpectedly cut him off with a passionate lip lock action. The brunette was taken completely off guard by the sudden kiss that was stolen. Honestly, how many times will he have to go through with this today?

And although Light wanted to fight back, he found that he couldn't. The second their lips were interlocked, his overworked brain practically melted. He truly was in denial after all of these years, wasn't he?

Yet even though sheer joy fluttered in his chest, his head wasn't quite up for the sudden jump from friendship to a relationship. Before he knew it, salty tears poured down his cheeks. A sudden flare of anger rushed through him. Light pulled away only to punch the man's chin.

L groaned as he rubbed what would most likely turn into a bruise in a few hours.

"You certainly are a challenge, ne Light–kun? You always have been, ever since the day we met. Shall I ask why you threw a punch at me from just kissing you or shall I assume you've somehow mixed me up with Mello?"

"You _idiot_! What I was trying to say before you went and…did _that_ to me, is that I don't want to be used!"

"Relax, Light–kun. It's not as if I raped you or anything. And with the way you leaned into me is proof enough that you do in fact, have feelings for me hidden away in that locked heart of yours." L fought the urge to roll his eyes. "At any rate, how many times do I have to say this to make you understand? I am _willing_ to go down this path with you. You need not to worry about being used, if that is what you fear most."

"How can you say that if you have no feelings for me? You're the one who's locked your heart away! It's because of you I had to act like a robot for the past few days. And, if I do accept this offer of yours, might I say here and now that it doesn't mean I _forgive_ you for what you did to me back in Germany."

L sighed, feeling more as if they were going around in circles. This conversation was really going nowhere, which was why he initiated a kiss in the first place. He had hoped that if words would not calm Light down then action would. Obviously it didn't help.

"If that is what you truly feel, then I can't really complain. I admit I am at fault for breaking your trust with me. At the current moment, I honestly do not know what I feel towards you. But at the very least, I suppose I should say what I think about you. I believe you are an immature, childish man, and at times you allow your temper to get the best of you. However, it has come to my attention that despite the not so great qualities about you, I still find you cute and charming. And might I also add that I liked that kiss. If you take my offer, then I want another one as your payment for this new bruise you so graciously gave me."

L meant to frown as he explained. But somehow in the middle of all of that it turned into a pout. For a brief moment Light had a flashback of the day when L had to leave after a month's vacation, back when they first met. That was the first and only time Light had seen the other pout, which even then he found rather adorable.

As the words finally sank in, Light was beside himself in giddiness. He leaned in to give a gentle, apologetic peck at the still forming handsome bruise he had left. When he pulled away L was staring at him comically.

"What? You asked for another kiss. You didn't exactly say _where_ you wanted it."

At that L's pout came back with a hint of disappointment. Light pretty much giggled at the sight in front of him. Deciding to indulge L's true wishes, the brunette leaned in for a proper kiss. At first it was gentle and reassuring. But in a matter of seconds their lip lock turned into raw passion. Teeth and tongue were introduced as they battled for control. This would have led to pleasurable actions, as there was too much sexual tension between them.

And then Watari walked into the room.

=3=

Death: *Insert long, over dramatic groan here*. I know, I know, it would seem the long awaited love to blossom between our favorite characters of all time was a bit rushed. Okay, okay, maybe not quite a bit. A lot, actually.

But in my defense, I had to do it. The climax is arriving, and I realized that the love has yet to take part. So, yeah, it might not have been exactly as I had planned, but hey, I like how this option turned out. And to make it a little more realistic, I had it so L's offer didn't quite sink in until a little bit after their first kiss. Light is in denial, he's super sensitive at the present moment, so he's not thinking too clearly or rationally. Thus, there is the reason behind the punch at L's adorable face.

And I admit, I am teasing you guys with the "would have lead to pleasurable actions" bit. What can I say? I have fun making my readers suffer. It honestly makes me laugh.

Although, as one reviewer has declared, I may have sadist actions, that does not exactly mean I am a sadist. I'm actually a closet masochist. But hey, we masochists' get to have our own kind of fun, right? Well, mine is in writing. Muwahahahaha. A brilliant mind, indeed.

Yes, yes, I also played with the Mello/Light pairing a little more. Although many wanted to see them together before L/Light action came into play, I couldn't find room in the plot. Also, a handful of others didn't want to see them get together at all. So, I compromised. Why not them share another hot kiss, but fight about it afterwards? It is what would have happened the first time around if they weren't in public.

So, without further ado, please click the lovely review button and sue me~

Oh, and it is a few days away, but Happy Thanksgiving! For this chapter is my gift to all of you reading this story.


	12. No Bravery In Your Eyes

Death: I apologize for the long wait. I sort of had writer's block for this chapter. But then I listened to a particular song and it got me into finishing this chapter. Also, it has helped that I got the Code Geass itch out of my system, so I shall be doing my best to keep this and a few other stories going.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter title inspired and from _No Bravery_ by James Blunt. This was the song that got me back in the game with this fanfic.

**Chapter 12**– No Bravery in Your Eyes

=3=

Love could be a wonderful thing in life, if used and cared for properly. It requires a large amount of trust to put your life into someone else's hands. Courage is highly appreciated when you do the same for your partner. Though it would be safe to say that love in life is a double edged sword; it can brighten the day or it can block the sun out in an everlasting eclipse.

And at present L was dangerously close to having their newly formed relationship waver down the drain before the two geniuses have had the chance to explore it. He had already abused Light's trust. Both of them were aware of this. And the young man has made it very clear L was not forgiven.

Light had not mentioned the conditions L would have to take to make up for repairing his trust. The pair of them was too caught up in the moment of waking up in the morning in each other's arms and greeting the new day with a few chaste kisses. Despite how socially awkward the detective was, he enjoyed kissing. Most of the kisses they shared L initiated himself.

And if a kiss on the lips was not called for, he would then aim a little peck on Light's cheek or forehead at the most random of moments. To be honest the young man was surprised at how affectionate L could be in the most unexpected of ways. When pressed why he took such actions, L would only reply that it was because Light was cute and leave it at that.

At first Light would protest that he was not cute. L would only laugh and explained that the expressions on his face were fascinating and made him cute, for seeing any emotion at all in Light's handsome face was far better than a blank mask. This sentiment was met with surprise, as Light knew that L made a point.

And for an entire week the pair has not gone farther than kisses and light touches. When Watari had walked in on them he was firm about them not having any sex until both of them were ready. And since then the old man hovered around them, never leaving their presence for more than five minutes. He would stare intently whenever L decided it was time for a peck on the cheek or a brief lip to lip action to brighten the younger man's mood.

Now that Light was in a better state of mind, he was mourning the loss of a long time friend. Mu had been a passionate young man who was one of the few who could penetrate through his defenses. He had died too young and had not had the chance to be a father.

The only bright side of his murder, if but a grim one, was that the child at least had one other parent.

One day as he had pondered over the murder, Light remembered of the man who impersonated his roommate had given him a business card. After going through every jacket he had in the closet he produced it for Watari and L to examine. L found it curious that someone would simply hand over a business card with their number on it while the man was impersonating as a dead man. They suspected the numbers were faked, but they accepted the card anyway in the hopes to find fingerprints.

It was only after Light had given them the card did the nightmares and the episodes begin anew. He had gone through a brief experience of complete bliss, a first break from the screams and the scent of blood that had been haunting him for the past nine years. The mornings were no longer bright and cheerful as it used to be. Light would wake up covered and sweat and held tightly in L's embrace. Often times the detective would be whispering sweet nothings while trailing feather like kisses up and down his neck.

During the day Light would stare into space, forgetting the material of their current case in his lap. He would lose himself in the screams as they reached a crescendo, forcing him to listen no matter what he was doing. When it was over or L's concerned voice broke through the non–existent screams, Light was left in a heavy state of depression that no amount of loving kisses would cheer him up.

If that was not enough the overwhelming smell of wet copper never left him. The sweet scent followed him from the moment Light awoke until he fell into a fitful sleep. After a few days he lost interest in food. On the fifth day he had enough of watching whatever liquid he had in his cup turn dark red.

Both L and Watari were now openly concerned for him. Butler Man was beginning to insist a psychiatrist be brought over, but L was confident enough that he can coax Light to take any substance to keep his body going. By now fatigue was taking its toll on the young man. And no amount of pleads and promises L made would ease Light into taking food. Sometimes he would try, but the smell of blood overpowered his nose to the point that no matter how appetizing the food was, he would not eat.

And now, two weeks after they transformed their friendship, there was another murder. L had suspected B would wait, for he had shown such patience in the previous case he was responsible for. However, it would seem that the time limit B allowed himself in between killings were shorter this time around. And this victim was what finally drew the last straw from Light.

When he opened the file of the newest victim to reveal a teenage boy just about to finish his senior year in high school, he bolted towards the nearest bathroom and began to dry heave into the sink. A woman's scream rang through his ears so loudly he could not hear the shouts of the other two men. Every time he inhaled to cough out his empty stomach, the air itself could have been blood instead of oxygen. Light was too much in shock to even notice a hand rubbing his back in silent comfort.

Beyond had chosen a boy who was similar to him in appearance.

What truly disturbed Light, though, was the fact he wanted to laugh at B's antics. He wanted to laugh at how childish the escaped prisoner was behaving. He wanted to throw his head back and laugh his heart out at how simply hilarious the turn of events was unfolding in this case.

He felt no remorse for the young boy, whose life was taken away before it had the chance to begin. Light found that he did not care for the horrible fate this nameless teenager had dealt with in his last few hours of being violated in the worst of ways.

And while Light was left confused and disgusted with himself, he had to wonder.

How could an innocent, brave soul such as L, fall in love with a monster like Light Yagami?

=3=

"I want to visit the graves of my parents." Light announced one morning. He had been staring off into space for an hour or two since he woke up, still recovering from his self discovery the night before.

L paused in his probing and stabbing the cheesecake that failed to serve its purpose of brightening his mood. It would appear the detective was starting to lose his appetite as well. He slowly raised his head to stare at the other male while he considered the request.

"Under normal circumstances I would not advise such a thing, but I suppose it would do you some good to have some fresh air. Watari can take us whenever you would like."

"I don't want to be driven around like I'm someone important, Ryuzaki." Light cut L off, his expression hardening to show how dead serious he was. "I'm tired of being chaperoned when I've done nothing. And for someone who does not like attention, you sure don't travel like a normal person. Did you know that people would stare whenever you leave with Watari driving one of those fancy limos? Hell, your cars draw more attention than Matt or Mello's, and they drive like crazy."

What brought all of this up, L wanted to know. The young man was behaving out of sorts for him, perhaps it was the fatigue and lack of substance was finally taking effect. Yet he didn't question Light. By now he knew what pushed his buttons, and questioning why Light went into a ranting monologue would earn another senseless argument. A fight at this point in time was the last thing either of them needed.

"So how will you get there, if I may ask?"

"A short bus ride to the station. From there it's a half hour ride to the outer skirts of Tokyo to where their graves are."

L considered for a moment. "Are you thinking of going by yourself or would you like me to come along?"

The brunette shrugged. "It doesn't really matter to me. Though I have another request, I've just remembered something important that could help this case."

"And what would that be?" L was studying the other with intense interest. Although he was willing to carry out these requests, there was something about Light's behavior that was bothering him.

Since the beginning of their conversation Light was detached. And now that he has remembered something apparently more vital than his request to visit the resting places of his family. There was a great deal of hatred in his tone that spoke volumes louder than if he had been shouting and screaming his head off.

"The criminal branded as the Demon of Tokyo. If my memory serves me right, my father had caught and captured him and thus he was promoted to chief. I don't remember much about this guy, only he targets young victims and seems to favor the boys more than the girls."

"Why do you want to look this man up?" L tilted his head.

"Just before the brutal murders of my parents the Demon of Tokyo had broken out of prison. I don't know if that is just a coincidence, or if he's been caught again, or if my father's team located my parents' killer. But if they have not, then this is the only lead I can think of."

"Light, you do know that this murder took place over sixteen years ago, right? If this case hasn't been solved yet we won't have much to go on. Not to mention you will become emotionally involved in the case. You know I cannot work when emotionally involved."

"So, that's it? Are you done lecturing me what you can't do?" Light's eyes narrowed, darkening to a dark brown L was not familiar with. "I seem to recall you gave me a letter, K. I can work on any cases by myself with the occasional help from you or Watari."

L felt a shudder rack his thin frame when the glare was turned up to full intensity. Several weeks ago he would not believe that eye color can be changed. Now, he was beginning to believe Mello was in the right track in saying Light's eyes can turn red if under the right form of light.

"We are in the middle of an investigation concerning Beyond Birthday, and you want to drop this case to a dead one?"

"Haven't you been paying attention? Beyond is challenging me, K! _Not L_. If I'm to figure out what he's planning, he must know about the circumstances of my parents' murder. It might even give us an insight on why he's targeting me specifically."

"While I can't exactly turn down such a promising lead, are you sure this isn't just because you are in Japan and thoughts of your family is the real reason behind your request?"

L could sense he was losing the young man to whatever inner demons he held. He was a stubborn creature, and he had every reason why he would rather keep Light in one place than out on the field. He knew there will come a time when Light will want to leave and get out. And L would be willing to turn him free, but he was still stumped on exactly what was wrong with the young man's head.

Maybe he should have taken to Watari's warning and allowed Light to be evaluated when he came to Whammy's all those years ago.

"Ryuzaki…"

This was the only warning the detective was given before a fist collided into his face. Out of pride and his belief of an eye for an eye L immediately retaliated. He sent a swiping kick and Light fell to the floor with a grunt. As his partner was recovering L took the opportune moment to straddle those slim hips. Light writhed as he tried to dislodge the detective off, but his strength was failing him.

L didn't have to hold down the younger male's wrists. There was no need when Light was weakly trying to push him away. All of his strength was put into the punch. He had nothing left in his arms or legs to effectively push the detective above him off. And yet Light was still trying, his stubborn streak knew no bounds. Usually L would hold his partner down until there wasn't a point to fight anymore. But at this rate Light could over exert himself. With his weak body the chances of any worst case scenario had risen by sixty percent.

So L decided on a new tactic. He leaned forward until their foreheads were pressed against each other. Before Light could demand what he was doing L pressed their lips together. This wasn't a light peck like most of their previous kisses. This was a passionate lip lock similar to that of the first day of their relationship.

Almost immediately Light ceased in his struggling. He couldn't deny any kiss L gave him, even if they were in the middle of an argument. Or in this case, fighting a physical battle, or maybe Light was the one who was fighting. L simply retaliated in the way he knew how, but sought no reason to continue their usual throwing punches and kicks. Sometimes the young man's emotions interfered with his sense of logic.

When L pulled away, Light had already forgotten what they had been arguing about.

"If you still wish to visit the graves of your parents, then promise me you will eat." There was genuine concern in those eyes of his.

"I can't make that promise, Ryuzaki. I can try and eat, but there's no guarantee I can keep it down."

"Then tell me why you can't eat, and I will do everything in my power to help you." L was frowning now.

"If I do you will think I'm insane and send me away and off of this case." Light narrowed his eyes.

"I won't send you away, which I can promise without a doubt." Ryuzaki held his ground. "Would you please tell me what ails you, Light-kun? It's hard watching you waste away like this."

"Tell you what, if I don't give you an answer within three days you can ask Near." Light had a hunch his former roommate knew what was wrong. There was that one night he talked nonstop without his consent, telling the pale boy whatever came to mind.

"Why does he know and I don't?" My, was L, the greatest detective of the world, jealous?

"This is only speculation that he knows. Since he's seen me at my weakest, surely he knows something."

"You don't think you're at your weakest point right now?" L tilted his head. Good, he was distracted.

"I've been far worse. There's that night when I was delirious from a fever. Oh and there's that day when I witnessed my parents being slaughtered." Light smiled at the last bit, it was a smile that sent shivers down L's spine. "I'm still recovering from that, actually."

It was true, since he still experienced screams long dead and the coppery scent that was no longer fresh. At the confession the detective seemed even more disturbed. Even so, he seemed resigned to the deal the brunette offered. It was better to give Light time and space, he thought, than pressuring him for the answers he sought.

"I'll hold you to your word, Light Yagami. You have three days." Right, like that didn't sound like he was pressuring the young man at all.

=3=

Since their argument Light has been strangely active. He was seen more often on his personal computer, going over their current case presumably. Whenever Watari or L was peering over the young man's shoulder, he was going over files of Beyond Birthday or creating a possible time frame for the killings of this particular case. Yet when they're not looking over his shoulder Light seemed to be doing a lot of typing.

L was already walking on thin ice, so he didn't intrude on his lover's privacy. Though he couldn't shake the feeling in his gut that he should try and see what Light was up to. Instead the detective opted for watching the young man, eyes never wavering from him without a second. If Light noticed he gave no indication, and thus L continued to stare.

At night the young man still had fitful sleep from whatever nightmares he had. But L noticed it wasn't as bad as the previous several nights. Whatever had a hold on his lover had lessoned, and thus L was beginning to have hope that Light was getting better.

On the second day as he was typing, Light reached for cheese and crackers. He had only been able to eat a few, for his stomach was unsettled at the sudden introduction of food. But it was enough to give L more hope that the other man was indeed getting better. It was a small step, a baby step, but it was enough to stop the detective from staring at the handsome brunette all day.

Upon the third day Light ate one and a half pieces of toast for breakfast. Taking it as a really good sign, L was in a really good mood for the entire day. He was even going to wait until later at night to ask if the other was going to tell him what was wrong. L was even lenient to allow Light to spend a few hours with Near, as a means of catching up.

Though the troubled feeling in his gut returned when he saw Light slung a bag over his shoulder. Why would he need to bring anything with him to visit Near? L was quick to inquire about the bag.

"What are you taking to Near? He's currently residing in another hotel." The detective stared hard at Light.

"Hm? Oh, these are notes to exchange with him about the case. I'd send it over through the computer, but I think there's a virus on it. It's been acting strange. Watari is trying to clean it out now."

"But aren't you the one exceptionally well with computers to rival Matt?" L countered.

"I couldn't get rid of this one. Thus the reason why I gave it to Watari, see if it's salvageable. If not, then I can always get a new one."

The detective turned to the old man, who was indeed looking through the young man's computer. Butler Man was in deep concentration, as he skimmed over the information on the screen and typing really fast.

"It's possible this was somehow hacked. I'm trying to see what files were hacked and what wasn't." Watari finally said, still typing away.

"Do you think it's Beyond? Although he didn't show much interest with technology, he has a knack of understanding anything he could get his hands on." L was still suspicious, but he can't ignore what Watari had said.

"It's quite possible it's him. Or perhaps it's whoever he has as an accomplice." There was a ding on Watari's main desktop. "Ah, that must be the fingerprints we scanned the card Light was given. The lab results must be done."

"I'll look it over while you continue working on Kin-kun's laptop. Oh, and Light? Matt will be escorting you to Near's hotel. And do please call when you're on your way back."

"You sound like an overprotective mother, Ryuzaki." Light scoffed. "But yeah, I'll be sure to call you anyway. Knowing you, you'll only call me if I stayed out too late."

"And don't think on evading that deal we made, either." L warned, but only half heartedly as he sat before Watari's computer.

"I don't think I could when it's you I have to run from." The young man laughed, surprising the detective by initiating a quick kiss.

L stared after him, shocked. It was the first time for the brunette to initiate one since the short time their relationship became intimate.

And with that, Light left the hotel room. He felt horrible for doing this. He felt even more so when his last sentence was a goodbye, if the wording was a little ironic. He had planned to make his getaway now while still in the hotel, but Watari's computer had access to the security cameras of the hotel. So he will have to play along a little longer.

When he came to the lobby, however, his mood soured.

"He told me Matt would be the one driving me, but he didn't say anything about you." Light glared at the blond, who was completely ignoring the glares and hotel signs that read 'No Smoking'.

"Yeah, well, I'm tagging along whether you like it or not. And…well, I'm sorry. For the way I behaved." Mello didn't make eye contact. This meant he was either embarrassed or lying.

Even though he suspected the latter, Light decided to take the blond's word for it. "You're not the only one who was being an ass, either. So I apologize for my behavior as well."

Mello took a long swig on his cancer stick. "Good. Let's get going."

The drive to the hotel Near was residing was agonizing. Although the ride was short, Light wished nothing more than to jump and bolt like a frightened rabbit. Still he managed to keep a calm mask that had somehow convinced Mello everything was all right. Usually the blond saw right through him, no matter how carefully he built up the mask.

Just as he was about to walk through the lobby, Mello followed while Matt remained in the car. It was then the blond dropped a bomb Light did not expect.

"You know he was using you, right? To keep you close. He didn't want to lose you to Beyond. He knew what that bastard was planning since the very beginning, or suspected it anyway. But now his motives are clear, and he's even more determined to keep you on his side. I have to say I'm surprised he even let you leave his room."

Mello didn't need to give any indication on who he was talking about. Light understood. Although he had suspected what the blond said, he did not believe it to be true. Or perhaps he played the fool on wishing it were not true. Once again his emotions interfered with his logic.

"Perhaps I'm very good at convincing people." Light turned to glance at the teenager over his shoulder, smiling a smile that disturbed the blond.

"Anyway, be sure to call us when you want to head back. We'll be just a few blocks down. There's a mall with an awesome arcade." And with that Mello turned and got back in the car.

They both knew there wasn't going to be a call. In his own way, Mello said his own goodbye. It was comforting, but it left a bittersweet taste in his mouth. Even so Light walked through the lobby doors and continued on his way to Near's room.

Before he could knock the pale boy opened the door, holding the panda bear close to his chest. His dark grey eyes held an accusing gaze, as if he knew what Light was planning. First Mello, now Near? Was he truly an open book? Or perhaps these two boys knew him well enough to predict his actions. This was most probable, considering their close history.

"You're leaving. I understand what you're trying to do. And since Mello didn't stop you, I'm not going to either. But is this fair for Ryuzaki?" Near accused as the young man let himself into the ever so expensive suite.

"It would save him a lot of trouble and pain if I do this. Besides, if we make Beyond think that I've fallen for his trap then we can get this case moving and spring a trap of our own." Light didn't sit down like he normally would. He wasn't going to stick around for very long.

"How would this avoid any pain for him? With emotions he's vulnerable, you know this. And yet you're going to do this anyway. Why?" The pale boy was almost shouting.

"Because I'm a monster." Light glared, eyes burning red. "I've been one since the day my parents were murdered. It's too late to reverse what has been done. Have you seen B's latest victim? I almost a laughing fit at how ridiculous his antics were! What kind of person laughs at the death of someone?"

"Someone with serious psychological problems." Near tightened his hold on the stuffed bear. "But things like this can be treated, Light."

"Treated, not _cured_. Do you know any method where I can no longer hear screams in my head? Endless screams that can rise and fall like music? Do you know any medication to eliminate the smell of blood that invades my nose every single minute of every day?" It was Light's turn to be close to raising his voice.

The young man turned away, turning his back to the pale boy as he took a deep breath to clear his head. The screams have reached a crescendo again. He couldn't ignore it now, not when it was nearly overriding his sense of hearing. The screams were a pitch so high he was close to snap. But he couldn't turn on Near, no, never anyone he knew and was close with.

By the time the screams leveled off, he noticed a small hand on his arm. He turned to see Near staring at him with a look of regret in his eyes. And there was sadness in there, too. Light swallowed a large lump in his throat. It felt like he had just swallowed his heart.

"Then let me ask you something, one that Ryuzaki will no doubt want to ask you. Why didn't you seek help from any of us? Why couldn't you trust us? You're our brother, and for Ryuzaki's case, his lover."

"Because I was afraid to face my inner demons. I was afraid to face them because they will reveal a much darker side of me I denied for too many years. And if any of you were to help me, I was afraid it will hinder on the way you thought about me. I was afraid to lose all of you because I have the want to kill people in order to silence the screams in my head."

=3=

His plan was simple, even if it took a lot of time and effort on his part. All he had to do was create new identities and accounts, pour in money he had in other accounts then erase all traces. Just to be safe he cancelled all accounts Watari and L had set up for him when he was assigned K. All fake I.D. cards L had given him were left in the suitcase sitting in the closet.

Late at night he printed out only one I.D. card, one that has an exact picture of him as he was now. Light brown hair, honey brown eyes. He planned to use this and the matching account card to buy himself good quality wigs, colored contacts, at least two computers and one printer, and a whole new wardrobe set. Once he has obtained all that he needed, he will destroy the I.D. and work on pictures of him in the wigs and contacts for the other identities he had created.

With those identities secured, he will set out on obtaining at least three housing facilities. One will probably be an apartment within Tokyo. Another will be a small house just outside the city's premises. The third, he will have to look around a bit, but he was up for any options available.

The same will be done with cars. He will get cars of different models and make. He will buy at least four. One for each house/apartment and the last one will be for emergencies. He will not by the cars all at once, or at the same dealership. He will not risk being recognized even if the chances were small.

Once all the essentials are gathered and he is sure, sure that he will not be found, he will begin setting up records for the identities he used to purchase the cars and housing places. Fake birth records, school records, fake family history, everything to properly create a person out of nothing. With those four identities done, he will continue to do the same on a few others for emergencies or back up. He can't be too careful, after all.

Just to show variety, one will have to have a criminal record of some sort. Maybe one identity would have spent a year or two in juvenile somewhere. Another will have the boring yet well paid career of accounting. Another will still be a student, applying for online courses. It will be a breeze to go through the homework. The possibilities were endless for him.

But there was one career he will definitely have for whichever identity he felt most comfortable with. He will be applying for the work of a detective. He will have to do his hardest to make a convincing, clean record to set up that he was ready to become a detective now. It might not be enough to keep this job, no, eventually it will come under suspicion no matter how much he will try and keep it safe even under L's scrutiny. There will be no escaping the greatest detective.

Yet this was what hurt him most. To walk away from L when they had just begun a relationship, to turn his back on the man he had become to love. If it was even love he felt for the man, but he did care for L, he cared for him greatly. So maybe this was love. Yes, Light was ready to sacrifice everything for L. They say that's when you know you're in love, when you sacrifice everything for the one you loved.

And this was what he was doing. It hurt. It hurt so much he was beginning to have doubts. But he couldn't turn back no matter how much he wished it so. They faced a dangerous man with the high chance of an accomplice. In order to catch Beyond Birthday off guard was only to do as he wanted, to divide them.

A strange tactic, yes. But if he played his cards right, he could get close enough to Beyond. Close enough to end this threat. The deranged man had threatened Light Yagami, and in doing so threatened L and his heirs. He was not going to stand for such a threat. Not when the stakes were high and the possibility of someone dying was a far greater chance if he had stayed with the L Team.

Not to mention there was the chance his sister was going to be caught in the middle of all this mess. After all these years of separation from her Light still loved her. She was his sweet little sister. It was enough her parents were ripped away from her at an age she couldn't understand why, and then to grow up without a brother to protect her, a brother to drive off boys, help her with her homework.

She didn't need to be caught in the war. She didn't deserve all of this strife. No, she deserved all the happiness in the world after losing her entire family in one full swing. Although he didn't die, he might as well have for disappearing to some far away country never to be heard or seen again.

This was his entire motivation. The reason why he literally walked out on L's life the way he did. Coward he might be in some eyes, he knew he was doing what he believed right. He wished nothing more than that this didn't have to be the path to take, but no matter what conclusion he drew it was always the same. It was safer this way. It was safer for L. This way, if he did die in this war, there will be no hard feelings between them.

At least, he hoped so anyway. Knowing L, if he still loved Light even after all of this, there will be. But if he becomes the greatest detective, casting aside all emotions as he did before they jumped into a relationship, then he could live with that. He was fine with it, in fact. For this case, it was needed for L to take up his persona without regret or guilt.

He was fine with all of this. And yet he could not prevent the tears from flowing. His heart ached for the sacrifice he has done. The tears just keep flowing. It has been a long time since he last cried, since before the day his life changed forever. Perhaps this was why the tears flowed out so greatly like waves. He had bottled everything in, and now he couldn't hold them back any longer.

It was perhaps good that it was raining as he let the tears flow out. He stood alone in an alley. It was late, too late for anyone else to be out. Even in this heavy fall of rain no one would even want to be outside anyway. Still, even as he stood while his clothes were being drenched, he let the tears out. In his mind it was best to let it all out now and not try and control it only to burst later.

At some point he sobbed, his throat constricted, releasing only a whimper. Right now he was grateful he was alone. Here it was natural for people not to show any emotion, to show they were troubled or needed help. This sort of diligent control had been drilled into their genes for centuries, built into them like second nature. Although he grew up in Britain, he still withheld many of the beliefs and customs he had been brought up with.

And just as the tears began to stop, just as he reigned in his emotions for control once more, the rain had lessoned. It was not so hard now, instead became a light drizzle. The wind had picked up though. It bit through him as his clothes were wet. He shivered, and began to wonder where he should go for shelter. He knew he should avoid hotels. L would watch all of them like a hawk.

Just then something fell from above. He had become accustomed to the silence he nearly jumped at the sound. He looked over and saw that the object that fell next to him was a notebook. It was black and thin, and strangely its spine was not spiraled like so many notebooks he had seen in the stores.

He picked it up and turned it over to see that it had a name written in strange white ink.

Death Note.

=3=

Death: I realize that this might be a bit short compared to previous chapters. But this has a lot of heavy stuff, I think that it doesn't matter if it's shorter or not. Plus, I think many of you would be happy enough for an update, no? And I have finally reached the point I've been waiting oh so anxiously for since the very beginning.

And this is also when the writing style will change. I am sorry, but it has been getting harder and harder to write the way it's (mostly) been since the beginning. Where it sets up the theme of the chapter and all. Plus, Light Yagami has discarded what he was and is going to become someone else. He will not make an appearance for a while yet. We have to see how L takes to losing Light and how or if he recovers.

However, maybe the theme will continue, only the focus won't be on Light but L. This will prove to be challenging, as I've said earlier I am best with Light. L is a challenge for me, mostly because I am a full out Kira supporter even if I don't fully agree on methods. Anyway, it is something I will have to think about.

So, please leave a review.


	13. Sell Your Soul

Death: Well, here it is. I've decided to give L a try. Again, might I say that this was the freaking hardest chapter I've ever written. I had to make a few slight changes of the plot line, but these changes overall don't interfere with what I originally had in mind. Anyway, there's a few things here that will be just as big of a shocker than Death Note making an appearance last chapter.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter title is the same title as the song _Sell Your Soul _by Hollywood Undead. Yes, I did this for the sake that this is chapter 13 and the lyrics are somewhat the theme of this chapter.

**Chapter 13** – Sell Your Soul

=3=

He knew he shouldn't have become emotionally involved. He knew the chances of Light fleeing were high. He was L, it was his duty to foresee all scenarios and prevent the handsome man out of his sight. But he let his guard down. That was no excuse and he knew he should not have allowed such a thing to take place.

He had been so caught up in actually finding someone he could pursue a relationship with. He had the notion to believe that together they could continue working as the ultimate team. Only now he realized too late that this was just wishful thinking on his part. Light made it clear to him that it would be nothing more than a dream.

Of course, that just leaves the question as to _why_ Light would do this. Why would he resort to falling through Beyond's trap? Surely he was aware of B's plan to divide the L Team. Besides L, Light was the one who wanted to take Beyond down more than anyone else. After all as Light had said, B challenged K and_ not_ L.

Unless…

Unless Light was planning to take advantage of the plan to divide them for a strategy similar to the saying, "Divide and conquer."

L paused in his stirring of his tea for the past several minutes. Yes, it would make sense. He was counting on the L Team to continue in their investigation as their top priority. They would still be working together if indirectly, but they would still continue taking B down.

It still didn't make him feel any better. L felt so _used_. He was the one who used people to his advantage, not the other way around. Though if he were honest with himself, it was his own fault for allowing Light so close. K had chosen the worst opportune moment to leaving when L had reached a vulnerable point in their relationship.

He had been close to revealing his true name to Light.

A high risk, but he had been willing to put his entire faith and trust into Light. He knew the man was still furious about the entire L Team figuring out his real name, L thought he would return the favor in the hopes of gaining the man's trust. It was the only conclusion he could come to no matter how many time he thought it out. But his faith was shattered the moment Light walked out of the door.

No, it was shattered the moment Light initiated the kiss.

Somewhere deep in his heart he just _knew_ that meant goodbye. And yet he allowed the one man into his heart walk out the door. He didn't know exactly what their relationship meant to Light. Perhaps he will never know.

L was needed in this case. He needed to be at his best, which meant he needed to set aside all emotions and be detached as he had always been. And yet he was finding it harder to accomplish setting aside the hurt he felt about how well Light betrayed him. He had done it as if their relationship meant _nothing_ to him.

No matter what he couldn't do as everyone expected him to become.

They have been patient for the past three weeks, but he could tell they were becoming irritated with him.

He had been moping around but he couldn't help it. L couldn't get back into the game. He can't keep going like this, and he knew it. But thus far there was nothing he could do to put his mind back on the right track.

And to top it off he had a strong feeling in his gut that something was about to happen, something big. Something he had no control of whatsoever. This tight knot in his stomach was certainly not helping matters.

=3=

"You've been sitting around for three weeks. How about some fresh air? It would do you some good." Watari offered one morning as he made coffee.

L didn't turn towards the elder. He simply stared at the computer like he's been for the past several days without sleep. Or maybe he did nod off at some point. There were a few times where he had a lapse in memory. But at this moment he didn't care too much.

He just couldn't keep his mind off of Light. L kept replaying that day when the man disappeared over and over in his head. He should have stopped him from leaving when he initiated that kiss. He should have never allowed Light to visit Near in the first place. But it was clear the man needed some fresh air, and being the stubborn creature that he was Light only agreed if he was to visit Near.

What was a real blow to the face for L was that the man didn't explain what was wrong with him. Instead he had to hear from Near that the man he loved suffered some serious psychological problems. The boy said Light kept going on and on about screams in his head and the smell of blood.

L honestly didn't quite know what to categorize what was wrong with Light. It wasn't bipolar, even though it would explain a whole lot of what was wrong with Light, but it wouldn't explain the screams and smell. No, he could actually come up with a whole list of reasons to explain the screams that only Light could hear. But when he added the scent of blood into the equation, he was at a complete loss. In his mind that was not a symptom at all. The sense of smell could not be manipulated by a broken wire in the brain. It just could not be unless Light was taking drugs twenty four seven.

The only conclusion he could draw to was that it was a memory relapse of some sort. Light was still recovering from the death of his parents. But why would he hold everything in and not seek help? Why hold onto the horror for so many years? This confused him just as much as to why Light would make a plan of his own to ensnare Beyond by falling for his trap.

And then it hit him.

In his head he saw every moment he had with Light. In almost all of these memories Light had been polite, whenever he was inquired about his well being he wouldn't reveal anything but redirect the conversation, and he always flashed a handsome smile that until now L did not realize was a mask. It would seem as if the culture Light had been brought up in made an even more impression on him than he originally thought.

L reached for his phone and dialed in the number of a detective who was a close friend of Soichiro.

"Yes, Aizawa-san? This is Ryuzaki, I apologize for this sudden call. I just have this one question concerning former Chief Yagami you worked under."

"_Okay, sure, what do you want to know?"_

L had been good on his choice. This man didn't raise any questions as to why he was curious.

"Actually, this concerns the relationship between Chief Yagami and his son, Light. Did Yagami-kun ever look up to his father?"

"_Well, of course he did. Every son would. But I suspect you're asking just how much Light-kun worshipped his father. All I remember is the boy wanted to become everything his father stood for. He tried to be like the chief in every aspect as possible."_

There was hesitation in the man's voice, as if he wanted to say more. L sensed this and gently inquired for more information.

"I suppose there were difficulties?"

"_Yes, actually. Light-kun had some violent tendencies. He didn't initiate a fight or anything, it was all self defense against the bullies. But he still did hell of a lot of damage." _

That sounded like Light, it would seem he hadn't changed much.

"I see. By the way, since we're talking, I was wondering if you were part of the investigation of the Yagami homicide."

"…_Yes, sir. All of us who worked with the chief were on the case. But we couldn't solve it. Mostly because their youngest didn't remember a whole lot and her brother wouldn't speak to us at all."_

Aizawa sounded nervous. Curious, curious indeed. And the man called him sir when he had no obligation to do so.

"Very well. Once again I apologize for the random call. I'll let you get back to work."

L hung up before the man could reply. He reached for his personal laptop and pulled up all information about the Demon of Tokyo. His dark eyes skimmed through all the basic information since he had gathered enough from what Light told him. Then he stopped when something caught his eye.

The Demon of Tokyo, Takuo Shibuimaru, had escaped from prison and was still on the run. According to the file he was roughly thirty two when he made his escape. The man would be in his late forties by now. And L remembered how utterly ridiculous this man's thinking process was. This man had been clever enough not to be caught until his ego got the better of him. And then the man somehow escapes prison and poof, disappears.

He must have had connections. What sort of connections, L would have to work through them. There was just one detail that he had to go over. He scrolled through the case information for the victims. He did a quick count and his heart sank when yes, Shibuimaru preferred young boys from eight to ten. Although the man sought out young teenage girls and younger, the young boys was this man's favorite.

'_Why was Light so convinced this man was the one who murdered his parents? Yes, he raped countless victims, but would he really go for murder? Unless…'_ His heart stopped. He quickly dialed Aizawa's number again.

"Aizawa, I apologize for calling again. But there's something important I have to ask you. The day Chief Yagami made the arrest on Takuo Shibuimaru, the Demon of Tokyo, do you know if when he brought the man to the station if Yagami-kun was there?"

"_What? Ryuzaki, this is ridiculous –"_

"Was he or was he not there?" L's voice was firm and his free hand shook.

"_Well…I can't quite remember. It was over sixteen years ago."_

"All right, think. Do you remember what part of the day did he bring Shibuimaru in for questioning? Was it morning, mid morning, afternoon, late afternoon?"

"_Actually, yeah it was late afternoon. I remember because I arrived at the station later than everyone else for the interrogation because I had to pick the chief's kids up from school. When they called me we had him I brought them into the station."_

Everything clicked together. Wait, he shouldn't jump into conclusions just yet.

"Aizawa, I need you to answer me with the best of your ability. Do you remember if there were any bruises on Yagami-kun to coincide the murder of his parents?"

"_Yeah…I remember he had bruises on his arms and legs, but he wouldn't talk so I assumed whoever attacked him was intercepted by the chief. He didn't appear like nothing else was wrong…wait, there was something I found odd. He had trouble walking for a few days…"_

There was a pregnant pause from both men as they came to the same conclusion. L heard a loud bang as if the man on the other line punched a wall or a desk.

"_Damn it! I assumed it was just the shock in his system that he couldn't walk! But that wasn't the case, wasn't it? The man who killed Soichiro and his wife really was Shibuimaru as we had first suspected. Shit! They weren't his targets, it was Light who was the real target. His parents were just in the way. Shit, shit, shit, SHIT!" _

L heard what suspiciously sounded like papers and office supplies being pushed off the desk and fall to the floor in a loud clutter.

"Take it easy, Aizawa, calm down. I deeply apologize for not realizing any of this sooner. I assure you we can still build a case. Shibuimaru is still out there. We have to bring him down."

"_What about the case you've got us working on how?"_ Aizawa was breathing heavily as he was trying to calm down.

"The killer hasn't made a move yet. And I have the feeling that these two cases are linked somehow."

"_Ryuzaki, what do you know that you're not telling us? What are you keeping from us? I want to know, damn it! If we're going to work together successfully then we need your full trust on this."_

Well, he had to say, this was the first man to ever curse while even speaking to L other than his heirs.

"I promise you I will reveal everything in due time. If you would wish, I will meet with you and your team in private. However I would have to send Watari to hand over all the information."

"…_All right, fine. Whenever he can get here, we'll wait. In the meantime, send us whatever you have about the Demon of Tokyo."_

"Will do. And Aizawa-san? Please forgive me for not coming to this conclusion any sooner. If I had known earlier then we wouldn't be in this mess in the first place." L was sincere, mostly because of the guilt pulling at his heart.

"_I know. I know, I should have realized it, too. You're not entirely at fault. I just wish it didn't take us this damn long to realize the critical piece of that case had been the boy. And I was the one who took him in briefly."_

"Don't blame yourself, Aizawa." He wanted to say more, he wanted to say more to convey his guilt but he would give away too much. Right now L couldn't explain that he had met Light.

"_Yeah, I know. And hey, you shouldn't go blaming yourself either, Ryuzaki."_

"I'll keep that in mind." And with that L hung up once more. He wrapped his arms around his knees and tightened their hold.

"It all makes sense now…"

"What does?" Watari sounded as if he already knew due to hearing half of the conversation, but for their sake L had to say it out loud.

"Light wasn't hearing the screams of his parents dying. The screams he hears inside his head were his own. Due to the culture and the way he worshipped his father, Light held a vengeance deep within that he denied from the very beginning. Also, he might have pretended that the rape never happened. The shock was too great on his young mind and to top it off he may have witnessed his parents being slaughtered in front of him. He's been suffering from a small form of memory relapse. His subconscious has been trying to tell him what really happened, thus the reason why he hears screams and smells blood wherever he went."

At the end his voice broke. His throat constricted and he held back a sob. L had solved what was wrong with the man he loved, but it didn't make him feel any better. He should have taken up the case of the Yagami murders. But he had been worried he would become too attached since he had taken a liking to the promising chief. And now he wished that he had done what he should have.

"Watari, send word to M and N of what we just learned. I leave them to continue the search for Light. In the meantime I will help Aizawa and his team for the search of Shibuimaru."

"What about Beyond Birthday?"

"We wait until he makes his move. If he does, then I will personally look into it. But no matter what the police task force have to continue the task I have set for them. Same goes for the boys."

"Very well."

=3=

A month went by in a blur. Although L was back in the game, he still had moments where he wanted to run away or hide in the corner. The guilt was eating at him, but at the same time it was his drive to continue in the search for the man that had harmed Light in so many ways. Some days it became easier for him to slip on the mask of L, the greatest detective in the world.

During this time there was a strange incident that caught L's attention. There had been a criminal who had been taken an entire school as his hostage but then suddenly dies of a heart attack before the police could make their move. L was curious as to why the man had a heart attack, but let it be. He had other more important cases to tend to.

And yet he still had the feeling in his gut he should look into it. Instead L filed the incident away for later reference.

Another month went by and L had no choice but to call off the search for Light. The boys were switched in to add more support for the search for the Demon of Tokyo. They had sixteen years to recover and search for some sort of trail. But even with Mello and Matt in the field, they had to seek out more help.

By now the entire world was in an uproar at the increase of criminals dying of unexplained heart attacks. This was something the L Team could not ignore. This sort of case needed their immediate attention. L was beginning to have a plan forming, and thus he needed more manpower if he was to continue in the cases he was already working on.

In Aizawa's original team were of course the men that had worked under Chief Yagami. Kanzo Mogi was rather quiet and kept mostly to himself, but he was loyal and good on his feet. Hideki Ide was rash and he's made it clear he disliked L. Ide was close friends with Aizawa which would explain why he put up with L most of the time. Hirokazu Ukita preferred to take action and jump into conclusions. And then there was the youngest of them, Touto Matsuda nicknamed by everyone else as "the Clown."

L was often spent day after day resisting the urge for his forehead to meet the desk at how clueless and dense Matsuda was. But the man had a knack for thinking outside the box even if he came up with the most ridiculous of plans or conclusions.

And so Aizawa requested for a few more detectives in the field, preferably the best. Out of hundreds of candidates, only two were sent. The first was Taro Kagami, a man in his early thirties and has been a homicide detective for roughly six years. The second was a young hot shot who has been a detective for two years, Tatsuya Miyano.

L found Kagami promising and allowed Aizawa to give him the green light. Kagami was a detective that notices the little details and he like Matsuda had a knack to think outside the box. However, unlike Matsuda, his ideas weren't so dangerously idiotic. Maybe Matsuda could learn a thing or two, or so L hoped.

As for the hot shot, L wasn't quite so sure. Yes, Miyano had potential, great potential in fact. But the fact he was young was a drawback. Miyano had yet to have the experience of the field compared to Kagami. To top it off Miyano came off as arrogant and somewhat holier than thou to L. Still they needed all the help they could get, so he included Miyano as an asset to the team. Perhaps the Shibuimaru case will give him the experience he needed.

Now that Aizawa had two more members of his team in the field, Mello and Matt were pulled out to work with Near on the case concerning criminals dying of heart attacks. L helped both teams whenever he could, but most of the time he was dead set on the Shibuimaru case. What truly disturbed him though was that during all of this Beyond has remained strangely quiet. It was unlike him to lie low when before he was intent with a pattern. L couldn't see a pattern no matter what angle he looked at.

Even so L was slightly grateful that B hadn't made another move yet. The L Team as well as the Task Force has enough resources stretched as it was. Or perhaps B was somehow behind the deaths of the criminals? No, that wouldn't make sense at all. Beyond was the type of criminal who sought his victim and killed them with his own hands. He made the killing personal on a level that left most detectives confused.

This person responsible for the killings of criminals didn't do it by hand. There was no possible way for that to happen. Assuming of course this was all the act of one person. Mello believed it to be some giant organization, but L had his doubts. One, such a large group would have shown up on their radar at some point. Two, he had the feeling in his gut that this had to be one person casting judgment.

He had a suspect in mind already, but L couldn't even think it was possible. But part of his subconscious nagged him to trust his instincts.

Even so he set a trap to lure what the masses called Kira out. With the help of Aizawa pulling a few strings, L watched as the man sentenced to die today stare into the cameras in a cold stare. L had to give the man some credit, Lind L. Taylor had good acting skills to pulling his end off. Now to wait and see if the trap he had set will spring.

As Taylor began to poke fun at Kira's pride and how justice was going to catch up to him, that was when Kira struck. L watched with wide eyes as the man clutched his chest and then slumped over, dead. The spoon that he was using to stir his coffee with fell with a clang on the floor.

After a few seconds he recollected himself and his symbol appeared on the screen and he leaned forward into the microphone.

"I…I don't believe it…This was an experiment to test a hunch I had, but I never really thought…" He was still recovering from his shock, it would seem. No matter, it made him sound at least a little more human through the voice emulator.

He mustered up the strength to acknowledge the one responsible for Lind L. Taylor's death. He didn't know why he was hesitating.

"Kira…" He hated branding a name of a face he did not know, but this name fit well with the personality of someone who murdered criminals. "You can actually kill people without direct contact. So…my hunch was right. I couldn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes, but you can…You'd have to of course, it didn't make sense otherwise."

L took a breath. This time he had fully recovered as he addressed the entity one more time.

"Listen to me, Kira. If you just killed Lind L. Taylor, the man you saw on your TV, he was a condemned criminal scheduled to die today at this hour. That wasn't me. His arrest and conviction were kept secret from the media, and went unreported even on the internet. Even you had no way of knowing him, it seems."

He paused. There was a hint of a smile on his face now. Although he was afraid for his life L was enjoying this.

"But I, L, do in fact exist. So, come on! Kill me if you can!"

Yes, he was bold. He was risking his life on the line. But if he was in fact correct then he shouldn't have anything to be afraid of. Still he couldn't stop the adrenaline pumping through his body. He was challenging probably the most dangerous criminal. Beyond doesn't even compare to Kira, now that he had just proved that Kira existed.

"What are you waiting for?"

Nothing had happened for approximately a minute, so L changed tactics to provoke Kira.

"Come on! Go ahead and kill me!"

L didn't know when he became so suicidal. He knew he was going to get an earful from Watari and the boys later.

There was a long pause. He waited for another minute. L could practically hear his heartbeat in his ears. It was so loud and fast he was slightly worried the microphone would pick it up. But there was no soft echo of a heartbeat in the speakers. There was nothing but silence.

"I'm still here, can't do it, Kira?"

Such a worthy opponent deserved at least one last provocation. To make it all the better L laughed a little as he said the name of his opponent.

"Evidently you _aren't_ able to kill me." L was smiling now. "So there are people you can't kill. That's a valuable clue."

"Now I'll give you some information, in return." He didn't know why he felt so generous, but he had the sense Kira deserved such knowledge. "Although it was announced that this was being televised globally, it was broadcast only in the Kanto region of Japan, actually."

Somehow he had the notion he didn't have to explain that they had planned to broadcast around the world eventually, there was no need. There was no doubt in L's mind now as to who Kira was. Still he explained as to how he came to suspect why Kira was within Japan.

"And although the police have missed this, your first victim was the Shinjuku killer who took eight people hostage in a nursery school. His crime, when compared to those of the notorious murderers who've died of heart attacks, was not very serious. Moreover, this case was reported only in Japan, nowhere else."

L resisted the urge to laugh. Although he should take this more seriously he felt that this was nothing more than a game for Kira.

"That was all the information I needed. Therefore, I knew you were in Japan and since your first victim was a guinea pig just two months before I know you have not been killing for very long. We broadcast first to Kanto because it has the largest regional population in the country. That you happened to be there was pure luck."

L didn't dare say it would be short time for him to send Kira to die. If his assumption was correct, he wouldn't be able to stand it. And in the hopes that this wasn't who he thought he was, L addressed the criminal and not the handsome face he loved.

"Kira, it would interest me greatly to know how you carry out your murders. But that's something I can find out _after _I catch you."

"Kira…" Suddenly he felt as if he were saying the same words as someone else, someone with a familiar voice.

"I'm going to find and dispose of you, if it's the last thing I do!"

'_I'm going to find and dispose of you, if it's the last thing I do!'_

"I am…"

'_I am..'_

"Justice!"

L had no idea where that last bit came from. He was probably too into the moment. He still couldn't shake the feeling that he was hearing that familiar voice inside his head. Or maybe it was wishful thinking on his part. No, no, he did not wish that to be true.

"Till we meet next time, Kira." And with that L cut off the link.

He leaned back into his chair, his hands shaking. There was no sense in denying it. L knew it within his heart the identity of Kira was. It was most likely the boys had reached the same conclusion. However, there was the question of what he was going to do about Kira.

Firstly, he could not reveal this knowledge to the Japanese Task Force. Most of these men knew and worked under former Chief Yagami. It would break their hearts and their morale if they learned that the son of the beloved chief was Kira, the killer of criminals. There was just the problem of how to capture Kira without the Task Force to learn of the identity.

L would have to work on that. The second thing he needed to do was gain the trust of the men who were willing to work under him. Although he trusted the older men by now, the two newest team members he wasn't so sure about. Still, he was willing to give them an equal opportunity if they wanted to meet with him. They were going to be part of the team for the search of Shibuimaru.

But it would have to be after they capture Shibuimaru to tell if he could trust the two new men or not. L will be revealing himself to the rest of the Task Force, he was confident in them to keep a secret. Even Matsuda had enough sense not to blurt anything dangerous out in public.

Although he was tempted to show up in the field under the guise of Ryuzaki, see for himself how Kagami and Miyano reacted around him. Wait, no he shouldn't. Beyond was out there. Light had warned him that B had some sort of power where he instantly knew a person's name just by looking at them.

Now there was a thought.

L had something there. Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait…

If Light Yagami _is_ Kira, then he _knew_ what L looked like. If this was true, then Light just killed the man who pretended to be L knowing full well it was a set up. Light played L for a fool.

Unless…

Unless Light willingly fell into the trap for the world to see that he truly did exist. This incident did just prove that Kira was real, a real person and not some vengeful god passing righteous judgment. L was tempted to throw something now. Luckily he had been practicing being the emotionally detached figure of the greatest detective in the world and didn't strike out.

"Light-kun…if you truly are Kira, if this is your plan in helping us corner B, I would hope you will be willing to face the consequences of your actions. I cannot protect you if you continue down this road beyond the cases at hand."

L wished he could convey this message out, but he didn't want to reveal anything for the public or the Task Force to know. The very fact of Light becoming a criminal, it made L feel sick. But if they caught him, and he explained it was all to capture B, he just might be a little more lenient.

Even so, L knew he couldn't continue on like this. He had no choice but to lock away all of his feelings for Light Yagami.

=3=

Death: Hmmmmm. Again it feels like a short chapter. Although I could just be comparing this to Stage 05 of my other fanfic, which has broken my record of 17 page long chapter with its 22 pages.

1) Takuo Shibuimaru: Anyone recognize that name? Anyone? He's the experiment Light used after he killed the guy who took eight people hostage. Yeah, remember him now? I was actually running out of ideas of stalling in revealing the real name of the Demon of Tokyo. I was in a serious debate between Higuchi and Shibuimaru. But in another story Higuchi was the one responsible for the death of Light's parents (wait, am I sensing a theme, here? Ugh.), so I can't really use him otherwise there would be even more similarities between this story and _The Last Shisou Vampire_. So, I went with Shibuimaru. Which actually makes a lot sense, actually, considering what he was trying to _do_ when Light killed him.

Taro Kagami and Tatsuya Miyano: Ok, ummm...The first name people should recognize just by a quick look up. But, the second one? Well, it's...yes, it's recognizable, but...it's sort of complicated. I can't reveal too much. Although I get the sense I've already done so...

And I have finally revealed the real reason why Light has his strange symptoms! After like...13 chapters. Wow. Threw you off your chair, I bet? Yeah...

You know, I don't think we've ever seen L's side to the whole Kira vs L incident. I mean, yes, in the manga and anime we see him, but we don't exactly get to "see" his reactions. Or his thoughts, for that matter. It was...interesting, to write this famous scene through his eyes. And some of you may notice I omitted a few things. There's a reason why, most of it is due to the plot.

I believe that is all. So, please leave a review~


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